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Speaking of nightmare mothers-in-law, here’s another:


My mother in law is your stereotypical difficult MIL:

– She behaves badly when things are not about her or do not go get way. She had a wedding tantrum when she felt she was not being treated special enough as MOTHER OF THE GROOM. In every photo of her she is scowling. Whenever she talks about the wedding week she refers to her side trip to the Grand Canyon as the highlight of her trip.

– She is a manipulative crier and will start crying when she feels she is being “attacked” (i.e. anyone trying to speak to her about her behavior).

– She is incredibly self-absorbed and controlling.

– One day before the wedding, I was at a jewelry store with her and she was fawning over a necklace but it was more than she wanted to pay. I offered to buy it for her as a wedding gift. She happily accepted and seemed thrilled. She took it off halfway though the wedding and when my MOH asked her where her pretty necklace went, she said, “Oh, well Jane bought it for me but it’s not really my style so I took it off as soon as I thought no one would notice.” WTF?

There’s more, but to get to my question:

We live in close proximity to her and my FIL. She does a lot of things that make me angry, but I limit how much of it I share with my husband, because as much as he “knows how his mother is,” he will still go into defensive mode if I bring up too much stuff about her (I think he is also a bit embarrassed by her behavior).

So whom do I vent to when I need to talk about how I’m feeling? It feels like a betrayal to him when I vent to my friends about her, and yet I don’t want to be constantly talking about my issues with her to him. Getting a therapist just to vent about my MIL doesn’t seem healthy either.

Learn to just suck it up? My other concern is that we will be TTC soon, and after the very entitled “I AM MOTHER OF THE GROOM” behavior surrounding the wedding, I am already dreading “I AM THE GRANDMOTHER, I AM VERY IMPORTANT” routine. She already has baby rabies and is constantly taking about her future grandchildren.

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These days, the sight of Santa at the end of the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade marks the third week of the holiday season, and Black Friday actually starts on the Monday before Thanksgiving. In other words, I guess I’m a day late sharing these quick fantastic Black Friday deals from Amazon, but there’s still plenty of time to save big and get some holiday shopping done. (These are all affiliate products, which means I’ll receive a commission on any click-throughs or purchases you make through the affiliate links. As always, I appreciate your support!).

I just send Drew a link to these boots, you know, just in case he knows anyone who might have boots on her holiday wishlist this year. They’re $50 off at Amazon and if you use code DEALSWEEK, you can save another 20%, making the price quite reasonable for these super high-quality boots. (The short ones are great, too).

Can’t forget about our men. These are pretty hot for a stylish kind of guy. (Use code DEALSWEEKS to save an additional 20%).

This purse reminds me of something our own Kate would have (am I right, Kate?). At any rate, 20% off with code DEALSWEEK at checkout.

And this is a purse I would have (and do have). (20% off, use code DEALSWEEK). I like the sparkly one, too.

This bag is pricy, but so hot (DEALSWEEK, 20% off).

Anyway, there are lots more deals at Amazon all week, in electronics, fashion, beauty, and babies and kids. Even wine!



My ex dumped me about three months ago. Within a month, I started seeing another girl who understood and respected my situation, and we have taken things slowly. (I’m 29 and she is 27, fyi.) All my friends and family thought it was way too fast to find someone else, but I have a connection with her. We are now officially together and I’m extremely happy.

We both live at our respective parents’ houses, and while her parents have been nothing but welcoming, my parents don’t want to involve themselves — or see anyone else in my family involved — with my current girlfriend. I asked if she could come to our family Christmas celebration, and my mum said it would be weird because she and my dad have only met her once (this being because they didn’t want to meet her earlier because it was “too soon”). I don’t think it’s asking too much that my girlfriend be included in my family’s Christmas, and why should I not be able to see her from morning til night on such a special day? If I don’t go to Christmas lunch, I’m an asshole according my family, but my mum doesn’t understand that I love my girlfriend so much that she feels like family to me now, too.

The fact that no one else close to me wants to share my happiness in finding someone new just makes my heart ache. What should I do? — Must Spend Christmas With My Girlfriend

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My boyfriend, Rick, and I are having a disagreement about engagement rings that I hope you can help with. Rick’s ex-wife, since their divorce four years ago, has pawned her engagement ring because she “needed” the money, despite everything she got from their divorce settlement. Rick is very disappointed because he spent a lot of money on the ring and because he thought she would have given that ring to their oldest child and only daughter. Now he wants to get me a ring and get married, despite the fact that it is very early in our relationship, but we disagree on what to do with the ring after I die or if we break up.

Rick has asked if I would consider giving the ring to his daughter since her mother sold her ring. He said because he would be the one to give me the ring, this would be fair. I have three kids myself — one daughter and two sons — but Rick’s argument is that my daughter would probably get my ring that her Dad gave me. But that’s not necessarily true. Yes, she is my only daughter; however, she is the youngest and another tradition for many families is for the oldest boy to get the mother’s ring when he is ready to propose to his girl. Rick claims that my son’s girl is not going to want my ring, but I don’t think that’s necessarily true either. At any rate, I believe that a ring of mine would mean more to my son’s hypothetical fiancé than to Rick’s daughter, and Rick admitted that the ring would probably only be of interest to his daughter for monetary purposes.

Since this ring — that I don’t even have yet and may not want after all this — would be my ring, it would be of sentimental value to my kids, given that I probably would, in a marriage that went well, be wearing it up until the day I died. I’m having a hard time committing to leaving my ring to his kids, just because HE would have bought it for me, knowing upfront that it would be sold. My only comment right now has been to say that I don’t buy something for someone based on who’s going to get it when he or she dies. Also, Rick’s daughter’s not getting her mother’s ring because the mother sold it isn’t my problem.

Do you think it’s a fair and realistic expectation on Rick’s part that I agree to give my engagement ring to his daughter upon my death even though it would be of more sentimental value to my kids?

While we are on the topic of rings, Rick and I also had a discussion about who gets the ring if the marriage does not take place. I said that if I call off the engagement, he gets the ring back, and if he calls it off, I keep it. He says he should get it back no matter who calls it off. What is the proper ring etiquette in a break-up of an engagement?

Honestly, all of this talk about what happens to a ring I do not have yet sours the thought of a ring at all. Any advice or opinion you can give me is greatly appreciated. — Whose Ring Is It Anyway?

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TGIF! Drew’s been going in to work at 4 AM all week and, after spending five days in a row doing the morning routine all by myself, which includes feeding and dressing a 4-year-old and a 4-month-old, as well as caring for two cats, and doing all the other morning chores that have to get done, I have even more respect for single parents who do this all the time, morning and night. Also, I think I earned a margarita this evening (I say that as if I haven’t been drinking a shot or two of whiskey every night this week…).

And can you believe Thanksgiving is a few days away (for us Americans, anyway)? And then Hanukkah and then Christmas and then it’ll be 2016. I mean, what??

Anyway, that’s all I’ve got today. Mama’s mad tired and I might try to sneak in a nap before it’s time to go pick up Jackson from school. Joanie’s falling asleep right now and I’m down in 3-2-1…

Have a great weekend! Oh, and hey, would you do me a favor and ‘like’ me on Facebook if you haven’t yet? Gracias!