Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

15 Things You Shouldn’t Say to Your Family During Your Holiday Get-Togethers This Weekend

Since we’re in the middle of Hanukkah and this Sunday is Christmas, chances are a good number of you will be spending the weekend with family. To avoid unnecessary stress, I’ve put together a list of 15 things we should all avoid saying during our family holiday get-togethers. Check it out after the jump.

 

1. I can’t believe that sweater’s too big for you. You sure don’t look like you take a smaller size!

2. When are you going to get married/have kids/buy a house/settle down?

3. Mass is at six tomorrow morning.

4. I hope you saved the receipt.

5. I sure wish you and your ex never broke up. I liked him so much.

6. You don’t mind sharing a bed with your Aunt Suzy, do you?

7. Your face looks funny.

8. It’s okay that I gave your dog my chocolate Santa, right?

9. You probably don’t need that second helping of mashed potatoes, sweetie.

10. Anyone up for a game of strip poker?

11. I think I broke your toilet.

12. No thanks, Grandma, I’m on a diet.

13. I can’t wait to tell my therapist you said that.

14. Can I borrow $1500?

15. Let’s do this again really soon!

15 comments… add one
  • avatar

    MissDre December 23, 2011, 12:02 pm

    My mom is DEFINITELY going to be asking my boyfriend when he’s planning on giving her grandbabies. LoL.

    Reply Link
  • avatar

    Carolynasaurus December 23, 2011, 12:05 pm

    I would love to see the corresponding list: “How to Deflect the Asinine Comments Your Relative Make”.

    Reply Link
    • avatar

      summerkitten26 December 23, 2011, 12:31 pm

      i would “need” to see this list. my family doesn’t even make comments anymore. came home for thanksgiving and my dad put his hand on my stomach and jiggled a little bit, then laughed. yeah, thanks dad. not the best thing to do when i’m all period-bloaty. next time, i’ll bite him. probably shouldn’t do that, either.

      Reply Link
  • avatar

    bethany December 23, 2011, 1:33 pm

    11. I think I broke your toilet. –This is my worst nightmare!!!

    Reply Link
    • avatar

      silver_dragon_girl December 23, 2011, 1:51 pm

      It is my worst nightmare to be the person who breaks someone else’s toilet, too. I would probably climb out the window a la Rachel Green’s wedding before facing anyone after that!

      Reply Link
      • avatar

        Mel December 23, 2011, 2:00 pm

        My ex-roommate used to clog our toilet and mention it casually as she left the apartment to do god knows what.

        Link
      • avatar

        Taylor December 24, 2011, 10:36 am

        Who does that?!

        Link
  • landygirl

    Landygirl December 23, 2011, 2:03 pm

    Happy Festivus everyone!!

    Reply Link
    • JK

      JK December 23, 2011, 2:08 pm

      A festivus for the rest of us!!!!

      Reply Link
  • avatar

    Morgan December 23, 2011, 3:29 pm

    The only thing I plan to say this weekend is “Pass the wine.”

    Reply Link
  • avatar

    kittyk December 23, 2011, 8:32 pm

    I wish my grandma read dear wendy for #2 alone- she’s the worst about this! But its out of love I suppose 🙂

    Reply Link
  • avatar

    Theenemyofmyenemyisagrilledcheesesandwich December 23, 2011, 10:39 pm

    I’ve personally witnessed #5.

    Reply Link
  • avatar

    Sami December 25, 2011, 9:00 am

    Or how about, “I was only trying to wake him up!”, as my mother was slipping a plastic shopping bag over my boyfriend’s head as he dozed in a chair at his first family Christmas Eve….

    Reply Link
    • avatar

      kali December 26, 2011, 4:44 pm

      Wow, seriously?

      Reply Link
      • avatar

        Sami December 26, 2011, 5:28 pm

        Yep. Pretty creepy. I’m surprised he didn’t run from the house.

        Link

Leave a Comment