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“I Don’t Want to Marry my Fiancé”

From the forums: My fiancé and I have been together for almost five years and have two kids together. Last month we got engaged and now I'm not so sure if I want to marry him anymore. I felt like I pressured him so much into us getting married because I thought I truly wanted [...]

in Columns, weddings
{ 113 comments }

“My Girlfriend Wants to Bail on Wedding Weekend”

My girlfriend of 2.5 years and I have been invited to my friend's wedding on the other side of the country, in California. We will be going there for the weekend. This group of friends is one that I rarely see, and I am excited for my girlfriend to get to know these people better [...]

in Columns, weddings
{ 190 comments }

Updates: “The Bride’s Not The Crazy One” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing now. Today, we hear from "The Bride’s Not The Crazy One" who was afraid her mentally ill dad would cause a scene at her wedding [...]

in Updates, weddings
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Bridezilla Wants Guests to Pay Her Bills

In today's crazy bridezilla antics, we have "Brandy," a woman in her early 20s who got bent out of shape when her childhood friend "Gretchen" hadn't given a cash gift for her wedding yet. Gretchen, who had recently been laid-off "had given Brandy a homemade bridal shower gift and had said (TWICE) that she'd 'make [...]

in weddings
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“Should I Skip My Cousin’s Wedding?”

Growing up, I was very close with my cousins. I was especially close with my cousin Annie because we were around the same age. When we were 9 or so our parents shipped us all off to summer camp. When we returned, we discovered that her parents had divorced. Her mother had thrown my uncle [...]

in Columns, weddings
{ 77 comments }

“My Friend Attacked Me at a Wedding”

My friend Lacy and I were seated next to each other at our friend's wedding reception. After dinner but before cake (I remember because I missed cake!), out of the blue, under the guise of being a "concerned friend," Lacy tore into me. She began criticizing me about things that were none of her business [...]

in Columns, weddings
{ 123 comments }

This one from Dear Prudence really makes the woman who didn't want any toothless groomsmen in her wedding sound like a saint: I am 27 years old and engaged to an amazing guy. When I was a little girl, my dad was involved in a really bad accident and was burned over a large portion [...]

in Columns, weddings
{ 57 comments }

Today you get three letters in one — kinda like shortcuts, but a little bit longer (and you'll still get regular shortcuts tomorrow, because this week is awesome like that!). I'm going to start incorporating more of these kinds of columns — collections of letters that don't warrant entire columns on their own, but work [...]

in Columns, Three-in-One, weddings
{ 189 comments }

It’s time again for Shortcuts. For every question, I’ll give my advice in just a few sentences, because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great, being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to go. My wedding is just a [...]

in Columns, weddings
{ 91 comments }

When Wedding Gifts are Fluff

Yes, we're going to talk some more about wedding gifts, the topic that just keeps on giving and giving. On Monday, an editor-in-chief of a local newspaper received a letter from a reader asking for advice on how to handle a situation involving "a wedding gift, the recipients' reaction and the rapidly escalating conversation that [...]

in Columns, weddings
{ 177 comments }

Guys Don’t Want to Go Into Debt Being Groomsmen

We've discussed the high cost of being a bridesmaid a lot around here, but until recently I've never heard much said about the cost of being a groomsman. According to a study done by CouponCabin.com, more men aged 18-34 turn down requests to be in the wedding party than women of the same age (12% [...]

in In the news, weddings
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You may not be aware, but there's a new movement underway to do away with wedding gifts. As Matthew Yglesias from Slate wrote today: "Traditional wedding gifts no longer make sense in a contemporary context. Our gifting is based on the outdated (and, needless to say, sexist) assumptions of near-universal marriage, a very young age [...]

in Polls, weddings
{ 287 comments }

Poll: Would You Attend a Cell Phone-Free Wedding?

This article in the Times over the weekend made me think of this column from last week where the bride-to-be was annoyed that friends were sharing photos on Facebook of the save-the-date cards she'd mailed. While her annoyance is totally understandable, I'm not sure how I feel about this new trend of couples asking their [...]

in Polls, weddings
{ 118 comments }

From the forums: We sent out Save-the-Dates for our wedding a few weeks ago, and people have been posting pictures of the postcard to Facebook and Instagram, some of them tagging us in the pictures. This bothers me a bit because mutual friends who have not been invited to our relatively-small wedding will see it. [...]

in Columns, weddings
{ 290 comments }

20 Wedding “Must-Haves” You DON’T Need

In honor of Wedding Week on Dear Wendy, I'm re-posting this helpful list, originally published on February 6, of a bunch of wedding must-haves you can totally skip if you want, no matter what your grandmother or best friend (or, ahem, Gator Girl) says. Four years ago today, I got engaged on a snowy bridge [...]

in Lists, weddings
{ 282 comments }