Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Danke Schoen, Darling

By the time you read this, I will — fingers crossed everything goes as planned — be at my parents’ house in Germany, along with Jackson (sans Drew, sadly) for an 8-day visit. Given the time difference (six hours ahead of New York) and the fact that I spent all of last night on a plane either holding Jackson or, if there’s a God, watching him sleep in an available seat right next to me, I will, in all likelihood, be nestled in the guest bed, drifting off for at least six — nah, let’s be wild and say seven — hours of uninterrupted sleep, followed by another five or six hours of sleep, sleep, sleep. The song posted, “Danke Schoen,” sung by a very young, and surprisingly ladylike, Wayne Newton is a message to the powers that be for what I hope was (will be, since it’s still in the future as I write this) a very smooth and uneventful international flight despite doing it alone with a baby and a thousand pounds of baby gear. Amen.

My parents have lived in Germany for nearly 23 years, which means that I spent a few years there myself before graduating high school and starting my 13-year tenure in the Midwest. I haven’t been back to visit since Christmas, 2009, and it’s been since 1998 that I was there in the summertime, so this will be a treat — to eat some schnitzel and frites (plus some of my dad’s concoctions from the grill), spend time with my parents, and watch Jackson get to know his grandma and grandpa, whom he hasn’t seen since he was a newborn. There have also been talks of wine fests, petting zoos, and baby swings, oh my.

Don’t worry, I plan to work from there, so you shouldn’t notice too much of a lull in posting while I’m away. Although it would help if people sent me some interesting letters — come on, we want Intrigue! Psycho exes! Emotional meltdowns! Groomsmen with missing teeth! — and some updates. Come on, surely some of you have some problems you want to share with the internet. Don’t be shy. Oh, and Danke Schoen — in advance.

56 comments… add one
  • JK

    JK June 27, 2012, 12:30 pm

    Have a great time, Wendy!
    I hope you had a great flight, and take advantage of the grandparent-baby bonding to get some rest! You deserve it. 🙂

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  • Cara

    Cara June 27, 2012, 12:33 pm

    Schöne Ferien! 😉

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  • avatar

    jlyfsh June 27, 2012, 12:35 pm

    enjoy your time in germany and the extra hands to help with jackson! 🙂

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  • avatar

    sarolabelle June 27, 2012, 1:02 pm

    I’ll send you a letter Wendy! On my way to write it now!

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  • avatar

    lets_be_honest June 27, 2012, 1:06 pm

    I actually thought about writing one last night 🙁

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    • avatar

      sarolabelle June 27, 2012, 1:09 pm

      sadly, I don’t have that many crazy problems….like groomsman with no teeth. I’d love to hear an update on that one though.

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    • FireStar

      FireStar June 27, 2012, 1:11 pm

      Now this seems pre-emptive – but you okay? Still smoke free?

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest June 27, 2012, 1:18 pm

        Still smoke free.
        I didn’t mean to worry anyone (although its really, really nice that already people are wondering what’s wrong). Having some sister issues, which is upsetting because I never fight with my siblings.

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      • avatar

        ktfran June 27, 2012, 1:24 pm

        Ooh, write in about sister issues. I have plenty. Or start a forum. I love reading about family problems. Not that I’m happy you’re having them. Sorry, that sounded bad.

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      • FireStar

        FireStar June 27, 2012, 1:36 pm

        Sibling issues are sad – sorry hon. I only have one brother who sadly married an evil woman – and now I have no siblings because of it. I hope things work out with your sister – you all sounded so close from your posts so hopefully the fix will be quick and soon. Oh and that’s GREAT that you aren’t smoking even though you are dealing with something.

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      • iwannatalktosampson

        iwannatalktosampson June 27, 2012, 1:41 pm

        Write the letter!! Family issues run rampant. Everyone has them. I actually could probably write a letter – but there should be some developments by the end of the week so maybe I’ll wait until then – because for now the advice would probably be wait it out until you know more – whereas by next week there will be a clear fork in the road.

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest June 27, 2012, 1:52 pm

        Ok, ok, I will. Now I just have to be patient to not deal with it before Wendy replies and tells me what I really should do!

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      • iwannatalktosampson

        iwannatalktosampson June 27, 2012, 1:57 pm

        Ha I know I’ve worried about that before too. I tend to make rash decisions and if I’m faced with a situation it normally needs a response immediately. So write in right now – let her know it’s you and that you need it ASAP. I think she’s done it for a commenter before (someone that had a roommate with a psycho boyfriend) and if she didn’t have time maybe she could make it a your turn. Or a ReginaRey question. 🙂

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      • avatar

        painted_lady June 27, 2012, 2:19 pm

        Yup, that was mine. Roommate at the time had an absolutely insane boyfriend who was bizarrely fixated on me. I was so grateful to Wendy for posting that late on a Friday – the tipping point was finding out she’d told him stuff I’d said in confidence, which happened about half an hour before I wrote in.

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest June 27, 2012, 3:40 pm

        Ok, its submitted!

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      • iwannatalktosampson

        iwannatalktosampson June 27, 2012, 7:28 pm

        I love you for this. Words cannot express my excitement.

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest June 27, 2012, 7:40 pm

        For the record, I did not provide a sign off name so I’m really hoping Wendy comes through with an awesome one.

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    • JK

      JK June 27, 2012, 1:14 pm

      🙁 I don´t like you being sad. If there´s anything we can do let us know.

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  • avatar

    sarolabelle June 27, 2012, 1:09 pm

    Okay, people, groomsman with no teeth, #18 and all the other letters that were juicy last year, need to UPDATE! PLEASE!

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    • avatar

      Rachel June 27, 2012, 1:40 pm

      After the groomsman with no teeth LW replied in the comments and we continued to tear her a new one, I think she will be loathe to write in again, sadly.

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      • avatar

        painted_lady June 27, 2012, 1:47 pm

        Yeah. I’m pretty sure she’s done with us. She said she’d written before and gotten torn apart then, too. Any bets on which one she was? I’m betting the drunken picture-destroyer – something about the unpleasant way both commenters responded reminded me of each other.

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest June 27, 2012, 1:54 pm

        Maybe LWs would be more inclined to update if we made a list of people we really, really want ot hear from. Anyone with a better memory than me care to volunteer?

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      • JK

        JK June 27, 2012, 1:57 pm

        hmm, I´d like to hear from the one who discovered her husband had child porn, to see what happened.

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      • JK

        JK June 27, 2012, 2:01 pm

        Any of the LWs that were in an abusive relationship, as well (hoping they´re good updates, of course).
        And any trainwreck, I can´t think of any at the moment!

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      • CatsMeow

        CatsMeow June 27, 2012, 2:37 pm

        Hmm. I seem to remember some “trainwrecks” involving pregnancies. Like the one who broke up with her partner temporarily and he got a woman pregnant in the interim. And wasn’t there one with a woman whose husband got his ex pregnant or something like that?

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      • avatar

        Rachel June 27, 2012, 2:40 pm

        Yes, I think with their 3rd or 4th kid!

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      • JK

        JK June 27, 2012, 2:57 pm

        OMG yes! The one that kept going between one and the other, knocking each of them up each time.

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    • CatsMeow

      CatsMeow June 27, 2012, 2:33 pm

      What’s #18?

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      • avatar

        rachel June 27, 2012, 3:18 pm

        The crazy one where the woman hadn’t seen her boyfriend and was afraid to go to his house because of scary dogs and the whole family was in some sort of legal trouble?

        Wendy used it as #18 on some list of obvious times to MOA or something.

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      • CatsMeow

        CatsMeow June 27, 2012, 3:33 pm

        HAha oh yeah. That one was………different.

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  • the_optimist

    the_optimist June 27, 2012, 12:14 pm

    Have a wonderful time, Wendy! Out of curiosity, where in Germany are you headed? I’ve got family in Dusseldorf. I love it over there! Oh, what I wouldn’t do for a schnitzel sandwich right now…mmmm.

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    • JK

      JK June 27, 2012, 12:27 pm

      Ha! Im eating one for lunch at this moment. 🙂

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      • the_optimist

        the_optimist June 27, 2012, 1:11 pm

        So jealous!!

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    • Dear Wendy

      Wendy June 27, 2012, 12:27 pm

      A little town called schweinfurt, close to the Czech republic. Made it safely earlier this afternoon, although we didn’t get lucky and score a free seat. Seven hours with a cranky infant in your lap (plus a three hour delay) is brutal. Moms putting jack to bed now and dad and I are going to drink champagne on the deck.

      I will eat a schnitzel sandwich this week for you …

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      • avatar

        bethany June 27, 2012, 12:41 pm

        Just to clarify- Thumbs up was for champagne on the deck… Not for a cranky infant!

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      • Skyblossom

        Skyblossom June 28, 2012, 8:13 am

        We went to Europe this month and the planes were full both ways. Not an empty seat anywhere. We had a three hour delay too and the flight to Paris at the gate next to ours was cancelled.

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    • avatar

      lets_be_honest June 27, 2012, 1:07 pm

      So schnitzel isn’t just a weird word in a Sound of Music song…

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      • JK

        JK June 27, 2012, 1:47 pm

        You´ve never had schnitzel? One of the most delicious things EVER! I´ll have to make a new stop in the DW argentinian food and wine tour I think! 😀

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest June 27, 2012, 1:49 pm

        🙂 I don’t even know what it is. I imagine something like a pretzel, only because they both contain Zs.

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      • JK

        JK June 27, 2012, 1:54 pm

        haha. A meat (beef/chicken/pork) medallion, dipped in egg, then coated in breadcrumbs and fried. Unless you´re a sissy, and do it in the oven.
        Here the “Milanesa (schnitzel) a la napolitana” is really popular, its the schnitzel with tomato sauce, ham and cheese on top, grilled. And there´s a new restaurant that is just different types of schnitzel with different toppings.

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      • avatar

        Rachel June 27, 2012, 2:07 pm

        Well that sounds yummy. I also had no idea what it was.

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      • iwannatalktosampson

        iwannatalktosampson June 27, 2012, 2:18 pm

        If this thread takes a turn down foodie lane I won’t be mad. Lets discuss really fattening awesome food – because I’m on a diet and not eating them, and kinda masochistic right now.

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      • JK

        JK June 27, 2012, 2:22 pm

        That´s the site for the place I was saying, I know most people won´t understand the descriptions (I´m happy to translate) but the photos alone are making my mouth water!

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      • iwannatalktosampson

        iwannatalktosampson June 27, 2012, 2:32 pm

        YUM! My three favorite food ingredients are chicken, sour cream, and cheese. And if those can be fried I am in heaven.

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      • Cara

        Cara June 27, 2012, 2:46 pm

        Schnitzel is awesome!

        The original Schnitzel goes like this:

        calf medaillon – pound it with a hammer until very thin, dip in flour, shake off excess flour, dip in egg, dip in bread crumbs, fry in concentrated butter.

        It tastes sooo good.

        I sometimes make them for my friends. Now, who wants to be my friend?

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      • avatar

        rachel June 27, 2012, 7:34 pm

        I’m in!

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      • Skyblossom

        Skyblossom June 28, 2012, 8:15 am

        Sounds sort of like chicken friend steak.

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest June 27, 2012, 3:39 pm

        Mmmm. So its basically fried meat. Sounds awesome.

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      • avatar

        6napkinburger June 27, 2012, 6:09 pm

        It always struck me as chicken/veal/etc. parmagiana without the parm.

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  • avatar

    painted_lady June 27, 2012, 1:42 pm

    Does anyone else think young Wayne Newton looks and sounds a whole hell of a lot like kd lang? Except kd lang has better vocal quality.

    Have so much fun, Wendy! Post pictures!

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    • Roxy_84

      Roxy_84 June 27, 2012, 5:53 pm

      My brother showed me this video last year. I did not believe it was Wayne Newton. Not just in a “no way!” kind of way, but in a “are you crazy? I’m going to find out who this woman actually is”. It is him though…surprisingly ladylike indeed.

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      • avatar

        painted_lady June 27, 2012, 7:23 pm

        Oh no, I know it isn’t kd lang – she was kind of sort of big in an indie way in the really early 90s, but there’s actually a striking similarity.

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  • avatar

    Addie Pray June 27, 2012, 2:42 pm

    IWTTS – I could write in about my determination to “save” my high school boyfriend even though he keeps disappearing on me. Everyone would be really nasty and then we could say AHA the LW is AP and then they’d be all “oh, you go girl!” Hahaha.

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    • avatar

      lets_be_honest June 27, 2012, 3:43 pm

      Its true tho, usually when the LW starts commenting, we’re all nicer, even BGM.

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    • iwannatalktosampson

      iwannatalktosampson June 27, 2012, 7:30 pm

      Haha they would start telling you to trust your gut. But what they don’t know about you is that your gut is awful! It always leads you astray. I need an update on that situation – and also on the hott attorney down the hall.

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  • avatar

    Rangerchic June 27, 2012, 2:59 pm

    Have a great time Wendy!
    Interestingly enough my daughter (who turned 17 on the trip) just got back from spending 3 weeks in Germany with a small group of kids (about 10) from German class. She absolutely loved it. Started in Munich and stayed 2 weeks in Berlin with a host family (the daughter of the host family stayed with us last year so they already knew each other). It was a great experience for her and I hope to someday visit Germany and Switzerland and Austria. She visited Poland and Switzerland and Austria and Austria was her favorite. I have ancestors from Altdorf Switzerland and would love to visit that tiny town. But, alas, I don’t speak German and would probably feel totally lost – I guess I have to be sure and bring my German speaking daughter!

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