Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Dear Young Me

Over the weekend, Huffington Post featured a website that’s new to me called “Dear Young Me,” a submission-based blog that publishes bite-size notes and messages people would send to their younger selves if they could. File this in the “Wish I’d Thought of It First” category. Who doesn’t love nostalgia, anonymous confessions, voyeurism, and pondering terrible past mistakes, heartaches, and everything that has been lost along the way?

Not surprisingly, there’s a shit ton of “You shoulda MOA right away” messages, which get tedious to wade through, but sprinkled among those are some funny, wise, and truly sad ones, too.

My note to my younger self would probably go something like this:

“Wear sunscreen, make the most of piano lessons, and take a taste of everything (you never know what you might end up liking).”

What about you?

[via HuffPo]

112 comments… add one
  • JK

    JK June 11, 2012, 3:04 pm

    Remember that some people are out of your life for a good reason, don´t let them back in!

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    • JK

      JK June 11, 2012, 3:31 pm

      Also (and kind of related): It´s OK if not everybody likes you.

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest June 11, 2012, 3:38 pm

        I’ve thought of writing a book to my daughter of all the advice I wish I could’ve given myself way back when. Someday maybe I will, for now torn off scrap paper and notes on napkins in a box will have to suffice.

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      • JK

        JK June 11, 2012, 3:39 pm

        Ooh, good idea. I´ll take 2 copies. 🙂

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      • dandywarhol

        dandywarhol June 11, 2012, 6:27 pm

        That’s exactly what I would say. If only i had a time machine!

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    • avatar

      Jessibel5 June 11, 2012, 4:00 pm

      Unrelated to topic, but this piece of advice hits so close to home it’s like a dagger in the heart. My first love came back into my life about 6 years after our emotionally devastating breakup, and tried to get me to sleep with him one night. A few months earlier, I had been at a Halloween party and a hand reader told me to not let someone from my past back into my life, or it would cause me pain. I refused to sleep with him, not even thinking about the hand reader’s prediction (which was totally vague, so it is obviously something they say to plenty of people). I found out later that he had herpes, and probably would have passed it to me if I had slept with him! Hooray for dodged bullets!

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      • JK

        JK June 11, 2012, 4:06 pm

        Wow… dodged bullet indeed! And what an ass your ex!

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  • avatar

    Christy June 11, 2012, 3:07 pm

    It’s ok to like girls. No one cares.

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    • avatar

      Christy June 11, 2012, 3:12 pm

      Related: She likes you back. Just go for it.

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    • honeybeenicki

      honeybeenicki June 11, 2012, 5:09 pm

      And if anyone cares, theirs is not an opinion that you should really care about anyway.

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      • avatar

        caffeinatrix June 14, 2012, 12:56 am

        Because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind. 🙂

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  • Lili

    Lili June 11, 2012, 3:11 pm

    Losing your self respect and losing yourself are one and the same. Never let either go for another person.

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  • avatar

    Suzanne June 11, 2012, 3:17 pm

    If a romantic interest likes you, they’ll let you know. Don’t spend time and energy worrying about it – choose to spend time with the ones that make you feel special.

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    • Brad

      Brad June 12, 2012, 6:48 am

      Heh probably true for the most part, especially the older you get. If he’s a teenager or low 20s it’s possible he’s just really shy and has convinced himself that he has no shot with you.

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      • avatar

        Christy June 12, 2012, 8:20 am

        Preach! It took me six months to make a move on my current gf, and it took me ANOTHER 8 months to make another move. It’s a good thing I did though, because she was even more reserved than I was.

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      • avatar

        Suzanne June 12, 2012, 11:14 am

        Nope. This is just the kind of excuse we girls use to hold onto hope for someone that really doesn’t want us. “Maybe s/he is shy, maybe they didn’t get my 14 emails, maybe they’re afraid, intimidated…” That is exactly the kind of thinking we should avoid! If you want someone, you have to let them know and then let them make a move. If they don’t, move on.

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      • Brad

        Brad June 12, 2012, 6:28 pm

        Well I can’t speak for all guys out there, but I can tell you straight that I used to be the type of guy I described. I only started coming out of my shell in my late junior year/senior year of college, and I know a guy in my office that’s 31 who is only now starting to break out of his shell. Some people just aren’t comfortable putting themselves out there. I used to have insecurity/lack of confidence issues that kept me from asking someone out. I “just knew” that she didn’t like me so there was no point asking her out because she was just going to say no. Had nothing to do with how much I liked them or was attracted to them. So it’s not just an excuse girls invent out of no where to make themselves feel better, some guys really are like that (especially the younger ones).

        However, if you’ve been clearly communicating that YOU ARE interested in them and have said so in an email (or 14), and it’s gone no where, then yeah I agree that’s a MOA situation.

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  • avatar

    lets_be_honest June 11, 2012, 3:19 pm

    Your “wear sunscreen” reminded me of the Buz Lurman (sp?) “song” written to the younger generation. Remember that? Google it and have a listen guys.

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    • avatar

      lets_be_honest June 11, 2012, 3:28 pm

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      • Kristina

        Kristina June 11, 2012, 3:31 pm

        Yes, I love this speech/song!

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    • avatar

      *HmC* June 11, 2012, 4:08 pm

      Haha, that was written to *my* graduating class, so I could never forget it! It’s weird listening to it now though, it has more meaning.

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest June 11, 2012, 4:30 pm

        Wow, very cool. I heard it a long time ago, and found it more true now than I did then, too.

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    • caitie_didnt

      caitie_didn't June 11, 2012, 4:23 pm

      I have that printed out, framed and taped to the wall above my bed. I’m not usually one for trite quotes and sayings, but “don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours” and “the race is long, but in the end, it’s only with yourself” are my two favourite pieces of advice of all time.

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  • mandalee

    mandalee June 11, 2012, 3:19 pm

    Stop looking to others to validate how you feel view/yourself. In the end, it’s got to come from within.

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  • avatar

    kerrycontrary June 11, 2012, 3:20 pm

    It’s OK to say no to the men who worship your body. You don’t want them anyways so get out of their bed and go home. Be happy when you are alone.

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  • avatar

    lets_be_honest June 11, 2012, 3:20 pm

    GET ON A PLANE TO ANYWHERE AND STUDY ART THERE! Hurry, you will be pregnant before you bat an eye and will miss your chance.

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    • dandywarhol

      dandywarhol June 11, 2012, 6:34 pm

      Yes to the first one!! Best choice I ever made.

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      • dandywarhol

        dandywarhol June 11, 2012, 6:34 pm

        Ooops i mean yes in general haha. You know what I mean.

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  • avatar

    Kimothy June 11, 2012, 3:21 pm

    People can be attracted to only one gender/sex without being sexist. Yeah I wan’t smart.

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    • avatar

      Kimothy June 11, 2012, 3:26 pm

      Also, organisation is key and talk to more people.

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  • Brad

    Brad June 11, 2012, 3:25 pm

    Dear Young me: Stay the hell away from video games. Trust me. You’ll just get addicted and spend most of highschool and college trying to get headshots and exp rather than a girlfriend. And on that note, just ask Missy out already. She’ll probably say yes if you man up (but please for the love of God don’t go over there wearing socks + sandals, it doesn’t end well). Oh and buy as much Christopher & Banks stock (CHBS) stock as you possibly can when it’s 50 cents a share and sell it 5 years later. You’ll never have to work again. Now stop reading my note and go fucking make us rich, I’m waiting.

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    • honeybeenicki

      honeybeenicki June 11, 2012, 5:15 pm

      Stock tips to the young me would definitely be good.

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      • Brad

        Brad June 12, 2012, 6:56 am

        Right? It’s like the whole Biff thing from BTTF or Lou from Hot tub time machine. You’d have to be careful of the butterfly affect prior to the big event but as long as you keep a really low profile most of the events you know about should in theory still happen. The only problem I’d have is the initial capital to do it, or more specifically, where to get it from. To even hit 1 million you’d have to invest over 20,000 in that 1 stock and 1 million isn’t quite enough to retire on anymore (at least not anywhere near a city). To truly retire on that 1 stock would mean raising roughly $70,000 to invest with. If I knew anything about sports I could get it from sports betting but … yeah … the day I know anything about sports is the day you all better make your peace with Jesus because the world is surely about to end.

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      • avatar

        cporoski June 12, 2012, 9:02 am

        so you have really thought this through.

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      • Brad

        Brad June 12, 2012, 6:31 pm

        Surely you must have picked up on the fact that I’m a geek by now, lol. You can’t tell me this (“so you have really thought this through”) surprises you. 😀

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  • Kristina

    Kristina June 11, 2012, 3:27 pm

    Never let a substance fill your emotional void and that all of your tribulations will teach you some of the greatest things in life. Smile everyday and be appreciative of what you have, not what you don’t have. And, fall in love with yourself before you give that to anyone else.

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  • avatar

    bethany June 11, 2012, 3:28 pm

    Put down the credit card. You don’t need any of that stuff. Also, C is a sad, pathetic excuse for a man. There is nothing special or unique about your situation.

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  • avatar

    Lydia June 11, 2012, 3:36 pm

    You’re beautiful. You’re seventeen and skinny and tall and your skin glows. I wish you could see it and enjoy it and not be so insecure. You deserve so much better.

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  • avatar

    ktfran June 11, 2012, 3:38 pm

    Dear 10, 14, 18 and 24 year old self,

    Stop being a doormat. Also, stop worrying about what others think of you. Live life, have fun and remember to smile. Although still be considerate of others feelings. It’s who you are.

    Sincerely,
    32 year old me

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  • BriarRose

    BriarRose June 11, 2012, 3:39 pm

    Take college and a career more seriously. That way, when your big mistake (marrying the first boy you ever date) explodes in your face, you can take better care of yourself and your daughter. But please do marry that boy, because your daughter is legit the best thing ever.

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  • bittergaymark

    bittergaymark June 11, 2012, 3:43 pm

    You’ll never be hotter, sexier, or thinner than you are RIGHT now. So go enjoy it. One day you will be amazed that you ever genuinely thought you were hideously unattractive…

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  • avatar

    Jessibel5 June 11, 2012, 3:56 pm

    One day, you will be the exception for another guy who becomes your husband. But right now, you’re just the rule for this one. He doesn’t really want to date you, so stop pursuing him. Stop believing his lies. Just like the ones in HS who didn’t really like you but were just using you.

    Also, never stop running! You ran 10 miles a day in HS and college, keep that up! It’s a lot harder to get back into it as an adult if you’ve stopped for 5 years!

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  • avatar

    rachel June 11, 2012, 3:56 pm

    Start working out. Seriously, like regularly, not a few times a semester. And you should probably stop eating Taco Bell multiple times a week, even if it is free.

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  • avatar

    cporoski June 11, 2012, 4:02 pm

    Dear Young Me: Stop wasting your money at bars. The alcohol makes you gain weight and you could be saving that money to travel or do amazing things. You frankly are boring doing the same thing every weekend for YEARS.

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    • avatar

      quixoticbeatnik June 11, 2012, 11:39 pm

      This is a good point. You’re making me rethink why I like going out and drinking – I guess it’s the time with my friends that I like, but we don’t need to be drinking each time we hang out!

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      • avatar

        cporoski June 12, 2012, 9:06 am

        right, you and your friends could be doing all sorts of stuff. Like trapezee lessons or rock climbing gym or riding a mechanical bull or learning to cook or camping. Instead, we went to the same tired two or three bars for years, spent thousands of dollars, and gained 20 lbs. definately annoyed at young me.

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      • avatar

        quixoticbeatnik June 13, 2012, 12:20 am

        I’m annoyed at myself right now! I swore off alcohol for this week so that I could maybe lose just a bit of weight before going on a cruise next week and what do I do – drink every night. I’m not an alcoholic. I just go out with friends and before I know it everyone has a drink. Must. Break. Habit.

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      • avatar

        quixoticbeatnik June 13, 2012, 12:22 am

        It is kind of ridiculous actually. Like I have no problem wasting so much money on booze, but I balk at paying for pole-dancing lessons (so fun, BTW) or getting a Groupon for some fabulous place (which I did actually get a Groupon for a hotel in NOLA – everyone should check it out if you want to visit the city!). Like seriously, what is wrong with my mindset?

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      • Brad

        Brad June 12, 2012, 6:34 pm

        Careful, this statement is blasphemy to most young 20 somethings. I wouldn’t want you to get lynched or anything.

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  • avatar

    Stanfishing June 11, 2012, 4:05 pm

    Don’t start snapping your zippy so much…you will never stop. On the same note you will also not go blind as Sister Mary Alonzo said, so just do it once…or twice in 7th grade do not wait for high school.

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    • avatar

      lets_be_honest June 11, 2012, 4:10 pm

      The palms of your hands will get hairy though…

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      • Brad

        Brad June 11, 2012, 4:23 pm

        So that’s why that started…

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    • honeybeenicki

      honeybeenicki June 11, 2012, 5:14 pm

      But the real question is does God really kill a kitten every time?

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      • avatar

        Stanfishing June 11, 2012, 5:31 pm

        Not only does he kill a kitten he leaves a venial black mark (Sin) on your soul for which the only known cure is to tell as a priest…sitiing by himself in a dark room speaking to young boys… hey wait a miniute, hmmmm, maybe he, naaah!!

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      • Brad

        Brad June 12, 2012, 6:57 am

        The continued existence of my allergies says no.

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  • avatar

    *HmC* June 11, 2012, 4:06 pm

    Don’t think that giving everything to a man, or anyone else, will make them like you more.

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    • avatar

      MissDre June 11, 2012, 4:16 pm

      I definitely wish I had known this when I was 20.

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  • FireStar

    FireStar June 11, 2012, 4:18 pm

    Love yourself just as you are – you are going to be downright nostalgic for the problems you think you have. And embrace hair products – they are your friends.

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  • Fabelle

    Fabelle June 11, 2012, 4:27 pm

    High school/college self: Do your work now, because you won’t do it later. Don’t be a caricature of yourself. Participate. Don’t get those fucking highlights! Stop watching yourself make horrible decisions just because your writer’s mind finds it interesting. Study abroad.

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    • avatar

      cporoski June 11, 2012, 5:18 pm

      I love Participate! There are so many opportunities in High School and College to learn and explore. I was too busy thinking it was lame.

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    • Ettakit

      EttaKit June 11, 2012, 5:24 pm

      Participate! Yes! I feel like I didn’t take advantage of all the possibilities in college. There were so many study abroad programs and intramurals, but I was too wrapped up in my little group of locals to take part.

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      • avatar

        cporoski June 12, 2012, 9:09 am

        me too. my college had a planatarium that they did lectures about stars and different speakers. They had local trips camping and spelunking. I didn’t do any of it.

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  • katie

    katie June 11, 2012, 4:30 pm

    dear me:

    no one is going to care that you had a crazy childhood and you didnt have a social security number. actually, its going to be an awesome story that people are going to want to sit and listen to.

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    • avatar

      rachel June 11, 2012, 4:38 pm

      Um, I kinda want to listen to that story. Have you told that story before?

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      • katie

        katie June 11, 2012, 4:39 pm

        on here, a little… but its seriously a big long story. lol. it would be a lot of typing..

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    • avatar

      painted_lady June 11, 2012, 10:37 pm

      Yeah, katie, I am totally down for that story.

      Isn’t it strange and kind of sad that the things we think make us weird and unlovable when we’re young are the things that actually make us awesome and fascinating once we get older?

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      • avatar

        painted_lady June 11, 2012, 10:38 pm

        I remember the short version, btw, but I adore long stories about people I like a lot.

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  • caitie_didnt

    caitie_didn't June 11, 2012, 4:34 pm

    Do whatever it takes to make your parents take your acne seriously and get you to a proper dermatologist, so you won’t suffer years of terrible acne and the lifetime of self-image and self-esteem issues that come with it. Oh, and get a good haircut and some styling products too, okay? Dressing in clothes that flatter your body isn’t selling out or being shallow. Recognize that being smart doesn’t mean being better or smarter than anyone, and that it’s okay to be wrong. Know that there is more than one right way to do things. Don’t worry so much that not dating in high school will mean you’ll be alone forever. And don’t waste so much time with that boy in undergrad- he’s not worth it.

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    • avatar

      cporoski June 12, 2012, 9:11 am

      So I had acne for years and I went to specialist after specialist. when i was 29, we figured out it was dairy products! seriously! Not one doctor brought that up as a possibility. I couldn’t believe it. All those YEARS of bad skin could have been stopped.

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  • avatar

    Lindsay June 11, 2012, 4:49 pm

    Even if you think college grades won’t matter, consider that you might want to go back to school later and will want a nice-looking GPA.

    Also, insist that your parents put you in sports — it might make you more coordinated when you grow up.

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    • JK

      JK June 11, 2012, 4:51 pm

      Don´t worry about the sports… I did HEAPS of sports, dance, etc when I was little (up til I was 15) and I´m a major klutz. 🙂

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      • avatar

        Lindsay June 11, 2012, 5:01 pm

        Haha, good to know! I did dance for a long time, but it didn’t translate well when I got to high school and wanted to try out for sports…

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      • avatar

        kerrycontrary June 12, 2012, 2:38 pm

        The only thing I’ve naturally been good at is ballet, and I’m incredibly klutzy in real life but a very graceful dancer. It’s weird.

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      • Brad

        Brad June 12, 2012, 6:36 pm

        I can picture you as a ballerina. You’ve got the cute little body for it after all.

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  • Ettakit

    EttaKit June 11, 2012, 5:12 pm

    Don’t stop being active when you get to college. You can give up an hour of drinking and watching TV everyday to go to the gym.
    That tattoo that was so awesome when you are a badass 20 year old is not as cool when you’re a mellowed out 26 year old.
    And especially, don’t let him go. Work through your problems instead of finding validation from another man.

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  • honeybeenicki

    honeybeenicki June 11, 2012, 5:14 pm

    Don’t date someone just because they’re older, have a car, and can buy you cigarettes (among other smokables). When you wake up one day, you’ll realize you’ve wasted some of the best years of your life. Oh yeah and that guy Dave in your freshman neuropsych class? GO OUT WITH HIM.

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  • honeybeenicki

    honeybeenicki June 11, 2012, 5:19 pm

    I love this one from the Huffington Post article:
    Its okay to cry, its okay to be hurt. But dont cry for the same reason twice, dont let the same people hurt you again. Be strong, and dont let anyone bring you down. Its going to be okay. and if its not okay, its not the end.

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    • avatar

      MissDre June 11, 2012, 6:52 pm

      I love this!

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  • avatar

    Stanfishing June 11, 2012, 5:47 pm

    Waterproof mascara will not make your legs look for hairier, just because you haven’t hit puberty before all the other guys don’t fret, you will hold on to your hair longer, don’t get involved out of loneliness, a nice car will NOT help you keep women / friends, mocking people will not make you cooler, and the ole reliable, wherever you go there you are!!

    I could go on forever, having made so many stupid ass decisions.

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    • avatar

      painted_lady June 11, 2012, 10:40 pm

      Waterproof mascara? Adorable!

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    • avatar

      Trixy Minx June 11, 2012, 10:51 pm

      My favorite-don’t hold onto something that isn’t there. Its okay to let go cause being alone isn’t the same as being lonely.

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  • JK

    JK June 11, 2012, 5:57 pm

    Learn to drive as soon as possible. Don´t leave it until you´re 30, you´ll get freaked out too easily, and hate driving from then on.

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  • dandywarhol

    dandywarhol June 11, 2012, 6:55 pm

    Always be yourself. Don’t try to change yourself just to get someone to like you- it never works. Oh and it’s okay to be smart and act on it. And there is nothing wrong with you as a person!

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  • avatar

    Lamia June 11, 2012, 10:04 pm

    It’s ok to walk away from an unhealthy relationship. In fact, it is vital to your emotional well being to do so.

    No means no. Forcing it is called sexual assault and it is a crime. It’s ok to report it to the police.

    Its more than okay to get a restraining order on stalkers. Don’t waste pity on them.

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  • avatar

    painted_lady June 11, 2012, 10:49 pm

    From above: the things we think make us weird and unlovable when we’re young are the things that actually make us awesome and fascinating once we get older.

    Remember that Mom and Dad in a lot of ways, while wonderful and supportive, are sort of screwed up and unhappy, too. Love the support that you get, but when it isn’t there, it’s more about them than it is you.

    Also, one of my favorite quotes and why I think Maggie Gyllenhaal is the coolest ever: “There are two ways to be cool: One is to be disinterested and make it seem like you must be doing something much more interesting than everybody else if you are this disinterested. The other is to be extremely interested. You are not trying to please anyone, but you are really invested and really focused.”

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  • avatar

    Addie Pray June 11, 2012, 11:07 pm

    This is fun. I’d tell myself:

    1. Pace yourself on the nutty butters — you’re gonna be chubby
    2. Don’t play soccer — not worth all the knee surgeries and having to give up running and any sport involving pivoting and jumping (so, almost all sports)
    3. Play golf — You’re gonna love it and wish you didn’t suck so bad
    4. Don’t bother with the piano — you’ll forever suck at music, it’s hopeless, and you’re wasting your parents money
    5. Be nicer to Chris B. because he will grow up to be HAWTTTTTTTTTTT and dammit he liked you!!

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  • Lianne

    Lianne June 11, 2012, 11:14 pm

    Dear Young Li –

    He is a manipulative asshole. Don’t let him talk you into NOT moving to Western Mass for college because you will continue to tell people forever that it’s one of your biggest regrets. OH. And don’t stop singing and performing. It’s daunting to get back into when you feel “out of practice”. And finally, DON’T FILL OUT THAT CREDIT CARD APPLICATION!!!

    – Your older and SO MUCH WISER self.

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  • avatar

    RhyanShae June 11, 2012, 11:15 pm

    I would never know where to start. Perhaps, don’t take out those damn credit cards? Don’t pursue that relationship? Stop being so angry? Get over yourself, you’re okay as you are?

    Unfortunately, all those bad things I’d avoid made me a better, more responsible, more carefree person, so I’m not sure I should advise myself away from that. 😉

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  • MandaNoA

    Mandanoa June 11, 2012, 11:30 pm

    It’s not necessary to have a boyfriend so young, you have all the time in the world to date. Wait longer to have sex with your boyfriends, sex isn’t love. Don’t bother with the braces, you won’t wear your retainer enough and your teeth will go back and they weren’t that bad to begin with. Don’t be embarrassed of being a good student, the kids who think you’re a loser for caring about grades will be bagging your groceries when you’re 27. Tell Aunt Cin you love her as much as you can, you won’t get as much time with her as you think. And finally: PUT THE STIRUP PANTS DOWN! IT IS NOT A GOOD LOOK!

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  • avatar

    quixoticbeatnik June 11, 2012, 11:37 pm

    Dear young me,

    Think really carefully about what college you really want to go to. Take a gap year, even, before heading off to college. Maybe then you won’t go to three different schools before settling at the current one now. Also, pick an activity and stick with it. You’ll end up thinking later in life that you are a quitter. Don’t waste two and a half years of your life pining after K, because HE WILL NEVER ASK YOU OUT. He’ll just lead you on and flirt with you, even when you’re both with other people. He’s not the greatest guy in the world – he’ll come along right after you get over K.

    Finally – get over your phobia of people watching you at the gym and work out. Now I’m trying to make working out a habit and it is DAMN hard, especially when I feel so fat and ugly these days.

    But don’t worry. You are smart and you make good decisions, too.

    Love, older me

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  • avatar

    Anna June 12, 2012, 1:09 am

    Don’t take out a ridiculous car loan when you work at McDonald’s. Are you serious? You can’t afford that! You will end up maxing out your credit cards to pay other bills and having to file bankruptcy. I know old rustbucket cars suck but they are all you can afford! Don’t move in with your boyfriend without previously discussing marriage and setting a timeline. A man with a fake wife doesn’t want a real one, and you’re just going to get your heart broken. Don’t believe ANYTHING your parents told you. They are ignorant racist religious zealots who brought you up to be an ignorant racist religious zealot too. Accept and love everyone. Be color blind. Live your life in a way that makes you happy instead of living it just to avoid going to hell.

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  • avatar

    aisling June 12, 2012, 4:46 am

    dear young me
    doing what you really want, instead of what was expected of you will yield much better result, in everything. but of course, you should know what it is you want first. it’s half of the battle and all that.

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    • avatar

      Addie Pray June 12, 2012, 6:53 am

      oh this is really, really true. i wish i had spent the time to really figure out what i wanted first. you know, in high school and college, there were so many resources – guidance counselors, career specialists, etc. – I could have picked their brains re: career options and skill sets and interests! Instead, in my 30s for the first time I started thinking about what it is exactly I like and dislike about my job and what I want. Unfortunately, it’s kind of late to go back and consider other careers – or it’s just a lot harder to switch.

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  • Just Max

    Just Max June 12, 2012, 8:45 am

    Dear young me,

    You do not need validation from anybody but yourself. You do not need to please anybody but yourself. Accept that you dance to a different tune, and embrace it, and love it, and ENJOY IT!
    Oh, and learn to love your hair! Stop putting it up in a ponytail, please!!! 😉

    Love,

    Older me.

    Oh, and pay more attention during Math/Geometry class; you might need it. 😉

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  • avatar

    CJ June 12, 2012, 8:59 am

    Dear young me,

    It will be okay. I know you’re in a lot of pain and you don’t feel like you can tell anyone, but keep writing. It will all work out in the end. And someday when you’re looking back on those writings, you’ll realize how much you’ve grown and you’ll be proud of how far you’ve come.

    Also, stop putting yourself last. You deserve to be first. You’re the most important person in your life and never forget that.

    Love,
    older me

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  • KKZ

    KKZ June 12, 2012, 10:23 am

    Dear Young Me,

    Just because you think being “open-minded” and “free-spirited” are SO much cooler than being a close-minded prude, doesn’t mean you should avoid setting boundaries in the bedroom and in your relationships. Experimentation is fine but go into it with eyes open, realize what it might do to you, your relationships, and your opinion of yourself.

    Care a little more when people mis-pronounce/misspell your name – if you don’t value it yourself, others won’t either. In fact, value yourself a little more in general. Don’t be so damned shocked that someone would find you attractive that you give over to them sexually WAY before you are ready, just because that seems to be what they want you to do.

    Don’t be so afraid of student loans that you completely forego awesome experiences like studying abroad – you will regret that long after your degree is complete! And on that note, WSU is not a bad school, but you should consider your other options more seriously instead of just going with the “safe” in-state, affordable, satisfactory & adequate but otherwise unremarkable college. You have the qualifications to do so much more.

    Just because you’re not suicidal and still have happy moments doesn’t mean you’re not depressed. It will get worse before it gets better, if you don’t take it seriously.

    Have higher standards for how you expect others to treat you. Again, being easygoing and “carefree” doesn’t make you a better person – but it can make you a better doormat.

    Don’t let your relationship with your boyfriend trump so many of the other relationships in your life, the friendships you’ve spent years building, and the closeness with your little brother. Yes, I know, all you want to do is spend time with Shawn and sneak away for risque encounters whenever you can, but if you want to matter to other people, show them they matter to you.

    At 24 I’m still too young to be much wiser than my younger self – when I’m 30+ and do this exercise again to talk to my 24-year-old me, I’m sure there will still be lessons learned and things I got wrong. But I think those points above sum up the major ones so far.

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    • KKZ

      KKZ June 12, 2012, 10:29 am

      Oh jeez, how could I miss this – Young Me, YOU ARE A GOOD WRITER. You could actually have a shot at being an author like you always dreamed, but you have to share your work with others, not keep it locked with a password on your PC. Always keep writing as a priority, and avoid shoving it to the back burner behind more practical stuff, because you will never again have the kind of free time you have now to write, write, write for hours on end.

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    • avatar

      Trixy Minx June 12, 2012, 11:07 am

      Just because you’re not suicidal and still have happy moments doesn’t mean you’re not depressed. It will get worse before it gets better, if you don’t take it seriously. <<< I needed this. Thanks.

      Reply Link
      • KKZ

        KKZ June 12, 2012, 11:34 am

        You’re more than welcome.

        I have trouble believing I was this naive now that I look back, but I used to see those commercials for Zoloft and Cymbalta and other antidepressants, and the way they talked about depression (Depression hurts, it ruins relationships, it makes you a general sadsack with a cloud over your head, etc.) made me think Gee, I’m not *that* bad so I must not actually be depressed, I’m just in a funk. Well, guess what – let that funk go unattended and sooner or later, it hurts, it ruins relationships, and it makes you a general sadsack, And then it’s a long way back.

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        Trixy Minx June 12, 2012, 11:58 am

        I feel like I should know better. Depression runs in the family. So does suicide. This weekend was my boiling point and I’ve made an appointment with a psychologist. I was able to talk to the psychologist and she made me feel better so I think I’ll be in better spirits until my appointment next week. Though it would be nice if I could stop crying at random times.

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      • KKZ

        KKZ June 12, 2012, 12:22 pm

        I remember my boiling point too. Sometimes it sucks that life has to slap us across the face THAT HARD for us to get it. I’m glad you’re taking positive steps for yourself and wish you all the best in your journey. I wish I had helpful advice about the crying – but I’ve had enough uncontrolled grocery-store breakdowns to know that when it starts, no little words of wisdom (even from sympathetic strangers on the internet) will stop it. It’s cliche, but – hang in there.

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  • iwannatalktosampson

    iwannatalktosampson June 12, 2012, 10:26 am

    Don’t listen to all the mean girls. No matter what they say about you, don’t listen, it’s not about you – it’s about their own need to put people down so they feel higher. Also karma will get them in the end – they all ended up fat and pregnant by guys that don’t love them.

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  • avatar

    Trixy Minx June 12, 2012, 11:54 am

    Don’t give up on playing the Viola just cause you want to play with your friends. You were a natural at it and you are not friends with those kids anymore.
    Just because a guy can eat that much and not gain weight doesn’t mean you won’t.
    Do not get that car at the dealership. It will break down in three months.

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    • avatar

      Ally June 12, 2012, 6:05 pm

      “Just because a guy can eat that much and not gain weight doesn’t mean you won’t.”

      This! If only I had realised this sooner then I wouldn’t have spent the last 2 years losing the weight I put on from eating like my boyfriend does.

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  • avatar

    MsMisery June 12, 2012, 12:54 pm

    Dear 18 year old MsMisery: Break up with him. ALL of them. None of them are good for you. In fact, when your father says “Stay away from boys until you are 30,” listen to him. He’s saying it because he’s a dad, but Future MsMisery is saying it because you pick crappy, waste-of-time men. Also, go to med school.

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  • Budj

    Budj June 12, 2012, 2:42 pm

    You don’t know everything.

    Why were you such a little bitch when Mom wanted to teach us piano at 5? So much harder doing that shit now.

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    • avatar

      Trixy Minx June 12, 2012, 2:46 pm

      I’ve been practicing my viola but it so much harder learning it now than when I was a kid.

      Reply Link
  • parton_doll

    parton_doll June 12, 2012, 3:19 pm

    Lil Parton_Doll,

    All of those career tests that you are taking right now are telling you to be an actress or a psychologist. DO IT! I mean yes, by the grace of heaven you are now an engineer/actress and it works for you. But don’t be so afraid to follow your dreams when you first dream them.

    Ole Parton_Doll

    PS … Ole Parton_Doll turned out to be a pretty enterprising chick, so definitely don’t lose that 😉

    Reply Link
  • kare

    Kare June 12, 2012, 8:52 pm

    Dear Young Me,

    Don’t hurt yourself. It doesn’t make you feel any better and it takes forever for the scars to fade. You will be so much happier in 5 years, so don’t give up hope.

    -Older Me

    P.S. Hide your money because your brother is going to steal it for coke. That’s just the beginning so stay tough because the family depends on you.

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  • avatar

    Sue Jones June 13, 2012, 1:02 pm

    Dear Young Me,

    Don’t ever stop singing! Stay in voice lessons, because you are a natural and don’t take 30 years to get back to it! Just because the new high school choir director didn’t love you as much as the old one did does NOT mean that you suck and won’t succeed at it. Girl, you SOLOED your 2nd year back in a huge chorus… who gets to do THAT??? Good that you actually majored in biology and went to med school and please lose the scumbag boyfriends because you really did not need those “learning experiences”!

    Love, Older Me

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  • avatar

    MarkD June 13, 2012, 3:48 pm

    Dear young me. A smaller university might have been a better choice, and an hour or two a day of studying would have helped. Whenever you do figure out what you want to be when you grow up, tell the older you. He’s still clueless, but happy anyway. Oh, and work out some. You don’t need to be an average, unfit teen.

    Somebody has to be lucky, and it was you. Who else joins the Marine Corps during Vietnam and gets put into an IT career? What kind of idiot asks them to send him overseas, and ends up in Japan? Meets some amazing people, who show him things tourists never see? Ends up getting married to a really cute, nice girl? One whose parents survived the bombing of Hiroshima and they didn’t bury you in the back yard when you married their daughter and took her far away? This just doesn’t happen in real life. Except to you. Oh, and stay away from motorcycles, and guys who are headed for trouble. You were lucky, and you know it. No friends are better than bad friends.

    Then, somehow, you picked the right company to work for. Thirty-five plus years later, you’re still there. That doesn’t happen. Remember you were considering that Xerox job?

    Now the small, bad stuff. That pool? Don’t do it. You’ll clean it more than you’re in it. That trip to Hartford – don’t forget your shoes. Embarrassing. The VW Rabbit that was made in PA – well, everyone has to have a worst car, but that was a really bad choice. Karate – why don’t you start when your son does? It’s much easier when you’re young.

    Stay lucky. You know you wouldn’t change much if you had it to do again.

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  • avatar

    Sabrina June 15, 2012, 11:18 pm

    Don’t carry your anger; it wears on your soul. Just let it go and move on. Each time, every time.

    Reply Link

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