Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Friday Links

Here are a few things from around the web that may interest you:

“America is entering a new and unknown chapter in its ongoing story. With such turbulent changes come heightened fear, anxiety and division. How do we move forward, together? Regardless of where you fall on the political spectrum, there are things that all Americans can do to bring us closer #toamoreperfectunion. We created this poster as a timely gift to our fellow citizens. It is a collection of truths and insights that have the strength to tear down walls and cultivate real connection. Print it out and hang it in a place where it will enter your field of vision each day. Share it with the people in your life. Let it be a frequent reminder of the power you have as a vital member of our diverse American family. Our story is still unfolding — and it’s on us to write it.” — Download here.

Trump budget threatens nutrition services for poor women and children.

Study: Having Weekly Sex Will Make You As Happy As Getting a $50k Raise

New bill takes aim at men’s masturbation habits

How funny was that “BBC Dad” interview that went viral last week? In case you’ve missed it, there’s been lots of follow-up content related to it:

Anatomy of a masterpiece: 13 reasons why the ‘funniest video of the year’ is pure comedy gold

If you saw a nanny in this BBC interview, what does that say about you? (For the record: My first thought actually was that the woman was a nanny, but it had nothing to do with her race. I was more biased by her physical posturing, trying to be as small as she could in the frame, which seemed deferential and didn’t immediately strike me as the behavior of a wife/mother. But then I noticed that the kids looked biracial, and I remembered from my years growing up in Asia how different the culture is and how expectations of women tend to be quite different than they are in the west. By the end of my second viewing, I decided the woman was likely the kids’ mom.)

What If The BBC Dad Were A Mom?

And: ‘BBC Dad’ on Going Viral: ‘This Is Now the First Line in My Obituary’

The author of that beautiful Modern Love essay, “You May Want to Marry My Husband,” that I linked to a couple weeks ago passed away on Monday.

Thank you to those who submitted links for me to include. If you see something around the web you think DW readers would appreciate, please send me a link to wendy@dearwendy.com and if it’s a fit, I’ll include it in Friday’s round-up. Thanks!

Follow along on Facebook, and Instagram.

18 comments… add one
  • Cleopatra Jones

    Cleopatra Jones March 17, 2017, 1:20 pm

    RE: the BBC video

    I didn’t think she was the nanny because she was Asian, I thought she was the nanny because she looked very young (and they say Black don’t crack, Asian women have us beat on that front). I think Asian women in general tend to look very young even when they aren’t, and she was dressed casually so that adds to the misconception of her being the nanny.

    Haha, her face was hilarious though…she looked like, ‘Oh, shit I only turned my back from a minute?’

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      RedRoverRedRover March 17, 2017, 1:40 pm

      I thought it was a nanny because of the roughness with which she dragged the older kid. Like, it was pretty rough, he was on the floor at the end and she was pulling him out with his arm. I couldn’t imagine doing that to my own kid. I thought “holy shit, she’s fired”. I guess that speaks to different cultures again though. In the west corporal punishment and being physically rough with your kids is pretty frowned upon. Not so elsewhere.

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      • Cleopatra Jones

        Cleopatra Jones March 17, 2017, 2:04 pm

        I think it’s cultural. I think Asians and African Americans raise/treat their children in similar manners. I think as a whole we’re less coddle-y than white parents.

        Having said that…I didn’t think she was particularly rough more like panicked, and trying to get that kid out of there as soon as possible. Honestly, it would have been hard for anyone to gather up both of those kids, and exit gracefully from the room. She initially had the daughter by the arm but then she resisted, so she literally had to drag both of them out of the room so he could finish the interview. It wasn’t pretty but I don’t think anyone else would have fared better in the situation either.

        Actually, I thought the dad’s shove to the daughter was more rough than the mother dragging them out of there. He seemed annoyed but in a different interview, he said he was trying to get her behind the desk because there were toys back there.

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    Ale March 17, 2017, 1:23 pm

    About the BBC guy, I was thinking the other day that he is lucky he is a man. If he was a woman, mother of those children, she would be judged so so much. The guy pushes his kid to the side in a rude way and looks clearly annoyed. If a woman were to do that, the same way he did it, she’d be on hell right now.

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      RedRoverRedRover March 17, 2017, 1:43 pm

      I judge him, personally. I think my husband would have laughed and led our son back out. But I get what you’re saying, he’s not getting a level of judgement that a mom would. And I agree with that.

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        Vathena March 17, 2017, 1:47 pm

        I definitely judged him, but then I’ve never given an interview on live TV and will give him the benefit of the doubt for what was probably a reaction born of panic. (I think I also heard that he didn’t stand up because he was wearing jeans or pajama pants and slippers – not sure if that’s really the case, though.)

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    Vathena March 17, 2017, 1:29 pm

    I LOVE this parody of the BBC interview:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Ojvk-4IcOE&feature=youtu.be

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      Louann March 17, 2017, 2:19 pm

      That is hilarious!

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    girltuesday March 17, 2017, 2:01 pm

    I thought she was a nanny too, because of the pure look of “oh shit” on her face when she came rushing in. I got an “oh shit, I’m about to get fired” vibe from her, but then I saw that the kids were bi-racial and I was like, “Oh! That’s probably their mom.”

    I am incensed about the cuts for low-income women and children. I want to ask Trump supporters – seriously, not trying to be smart – why do you agree with him on this (if you do)? Genuinely want to know why.

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      Ange March 17, 2017, 8:06 pm

      I can’t believe he’s cutting meals on wheels funding! That fucker.

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      SpaceySteph March 20, 2017, 8:47 am

      I have a friend (a conservative did not vote for Trump) who says that the only thing about this budget he doesn’t really like is that Trump is using the cuts to fund military spending– as in, he’d be happy with deep cuts across the board if they resulted in a net budget decrease instead of just moving the money elsewhere.
      It’s one thing to be a fiscal conservative/small government advocate, I guess, but how can you not care about starving kids?

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        girltuesday March 20, 2017, 11:37 am

        I can understand that, sort of. I don’t agree, but I see that POV. Our military spending is outrageous.

        They don’t care because it doesn’t affect them. They’re becoming the party of “not my problem.”

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  • Diablo

    Diablo March 17, 2017, 2:19 pm

    If I’m having weekly sex already, can I get the $50K raise instead? Not to rationalize, but it would only be in Canadian dollars…

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      K March 23, 2017, 11:59 am

      Haha, I feel the same way!

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    SpaceySteph March 20, 2017, 8:50 am

    Ugh it is the height of Republican hypocrisy that they don’t support birth control, don’t support mandatory maternity coverage, don’t support abortion… and also want to reduce the ability for low income women to provide for themselves while pregnant and their babies after birth. Every life is precious or what?

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      girltuesday March 20, 2017, 11:37 am

      Yeah, it’s like – WTF are we supposed to do, then? They want us barefoot and pregnant.

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        SpaceySteph March 20, 2017, 11:42 am

        But if you’re barefoot, how can you pull yourself up by your bootstraps?

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    TN March 20, 2017, 9:29 am

    Counter to seemingly most people here, I thought the woman was his wife. Race had nothing to do with it; I interpreted her posture as simply trying to minimize the amount of attention she would get.

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