Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Friday Links: Peek into my Home

Here are a few things from around the web that may interest you:

My home — and Miles and Simone! — were featured on the design blog, Casa Sugar (some time, I will share photos of the rest of our place, including Jackson’s nursery, which was a labor of love).

From Reddit: “My wife wants to have a threesome, I’m having some concerns”

From PsychologyToday.com: “Why Millennials Hook Up”

The identity of advice columnist, Dear Sugar, from The Rumpus was revealed this week!

From Huffington Post: “The French Philosophy On Love And Sex”

From Newser.com: “Marriage Won’t Make You Happier”

From CNN.com and Oprah.com: “Keep sleep from ruining your relationship”

Thank you to those who submitted links for me to include. If you see something around the web you think DW readers would appreciate, please send me a link to [email protected] and if it’s a fit, I’ll include it in Friday’s round-up. Thanks!

68 comments… add one
  • avatar

    *HmC* February 17, 2012, 2:10 pm

    Oh I like the pic, Wendy. Very zen.

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  • avatar

    jlyfsh February 17, 2012, 2:11 pm

    The article on sleep really got to me today. I’ve been seeing a doctor recently to help with my snoring and we’ve been trying all kinds of things but nothing helps consistently. I have issues with my sinuses and have tried switching allergy pills to reduce congestion, I’ve been using my neti pot and just started wearing breathe right strips. Nothing seems to work long term. My husband isn’t making me feel bad about it at all, he’s very supportive. Which I’m lucky because he’s the one losing sleep. I also fall asleep in about 5 minutes where he takes longer. I’ve been bringing myself to tears lately trying to figure out a way to stop snoring. Has anyone dealt with that before and if you did stop the snoring what helped?

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    • avatar

      lets_be_honest February 17, 2012, 2:50 pm

      I am a BIG snorer and have sleep apnea. My sister used to, but got her tonsils and adenoids removed and never snored again. I’m looking into it myself, maybe you should too. I feel like I’ve tried everything, sprays, strips, etc. to no avail.

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    • rainbow

      rainbow February 17, 2012, 3:05 pm

      Do you smoke? I used to snore a lot and have sleep apnea. So I stopped buying cigarettes (I used to smoke about 30 a day) and I’m now rolling my own, much much thinner and maybe 10 per day, and the apnea is gone. I don’t know if I still snore, though, because I haven’t slept with anybody since I switched, but I bet I’m not doing it as much.

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest February 17, 2012, 3:09 pm

        Why yes I do! My SO has told me that my snoring is better when I smoke less, but I always just thought that was his way of giving me another reason to quit and doubted it being true. Oops.

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      • avatar

        jlyfsh February 17, 2012, 3:14 pm

        Nope never smoked. I’ve always had issues with my sinuses though. I think my DR did mention my adenoids and tonsils lbh as well as some other not terribly invasive procedure they can do in the office for my sinuses/nasal passages. I just hate having either done if I don’t have to.

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      • TaraMonster

        TaraMonster February 17, 2012, 5:06 pm

        I come from a line of sinus problems as well. It’s really only just starting to affect me in my, though not with snoring; I only snore when I’m drunk haha (so says my boyfriend!). One side of my nose is usually stuffy in the morning on regular days though. I use a netti pot too. And last time I got a sinus infection I tried something homeopathic: heat up organic cider vinegar and drink it (put honey it bc it tastes nasty!). I did this several times a day when I had my first symptoms and it was gone in a couple of days- I usually suffer for at least a week. It was pretty awesome, but I don’t know if this can be done as a preventive measure. Google it, maybe? It supposedly reduces swelling and thins mucus.

        I’m a little worried bc all the women in my family have wound up having invasive surgery to remove pollups and fix deviated septums. If it comes to that I suppose I’ll do it, but like you I’d rather not.

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      • TaraMonster

        TaraMonster February 17, 2012, 5:07 pm

        *…in my mid-late twenties

        oops!

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      • avatar

        jlyfsh February 17, 2012, 5:19 pm

        i will have to try your vinegar trick. and google to see if it will work before. i always have them for at least a week too. and even with antibiotics they are so hard to get rid of. and i also second the stuffy nose in the morning thing. one day we’ll both be able to breathe out both sides of our nose hopefully, haha!

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    • avatar

      Auntie Allison February 17, 2012, 10:13 pm

      Hi, jlyfsh. I used to snore pretty bad, I think. I’ve always slept alone, but I’d wake myself up snoring sometimes, and I was so, so tired. In 2007, I had surgery to fix a deviated septum and clean out my sinuses. I haven’t had a sinus infection since, so even though there was a week or two of intense healing, the surgery was totally worth it.

      I am also very heavy, and I was diagnosed with sleep apnea about a year ago. I use a CPAP machine at night and wear a mask over my nose (many people wear a full face mask), and I have never felt so well-rested in my life.

      Good luck on finding a solution!

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      • avatar

        amber February 18, 2012, 7:43 am

        thanks, allison! they’re thinking of doing a endoscopic sinus something (can’t find the paperwork right now!) to check things out and then go from there. the thought of no sinus infections ever again is definitely a plus. the good thing for (me at least, hah!) is that the snoring doesn’t affect my sleep or how rested i feel. it’s just my poor husband and one non-snoring dog who sometimes give me the evil eye when i wake up 😉 glad you found something that helped you! 🙂

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    • avatar

      XanderTaylor February 18, 2012, 3:34 pm

      My son use to snore something awful! He had to have his adnoids & tonsils removed due to infections & now I have to get right up to him to make sure he is still breathing. He is 19 and has had sleep apnea since he was born – that is one scary story all of its own. And, yes, I still check on him at night….

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  • avatar

    lets_be_honest February 17, 2012, 2:42 pm

    Yay! I’ve actually been curious how your home looks and since I’ve just recently moved, I’ve been redecorating and obsessed with seeing other people’s homes.

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    • avatar

      lets_be_honest February 17, 2012, 2:48 pm

      Ok, now that I’ve looked-LOVE the bar cart. I’ve been coveting one of those for a while now, but turned an old armoire into a “bar” so that’ll have to do (it looks pretty cool, actually). Also, I might have to steal the postcard idea. My daughter and I have a fridge magnet for every place we’ve been together (an idea I stole from my dad).
      p.s. Just because you are renting doesn’t mean you can’t switch the lighting situation. Switch it out, return the old one when you move and take the nice one with you.
      Lovely home!

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      • Dear Wendy

        Wendy February 17, 2012, 4:23 pm

        Drew and I also collect magnets from all the places we’ve visited, but the fridge in our current place is stainless steel and the magnets don’t stick to it, so we began collecting postcards that we could display.

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      • bittergaymark

        bittergaymark February 17, 2012, 4:34 pm

        You know, a friend of mine has a similar magnet collection. And a similar fridge. She had a piece of sheet metal made (cut and sanded edges) that she put on one wall and it made for a very interesting display in their den of all the magnets…

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      • bittergaymark

        bittergaymark February 17, 2012, 4:57 pm

        PS: How are those post cards framed? That is an amazing display… Love the clean lines of the symmetry. Plus retro cards are the best…

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      • Dear Wendy

        Wendy February 17, 2012, 7:41 pm

        Thanks. The frames are from Crate and Barrel (we used the last of our wedding gift cards) — perfect postcard size:

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      • bittergaymark

        bittergaymark February 17, 2012, 9:15 pm

        Oooooh. Nice!

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      • CatsMeow

        CatsMeow February 19, 2012, 12:05 pm

        I might have to steal the post card idea as well. I have tons of them from my last road trip. They’re super kitschy, in a good way. I also like the magnets on sheet metal idea…

        I’m not sure I can have plants with my dumb cats, though. I bought a cactus recently because I thought *surely* my cats wouldn’t be dumb enough to fuck with it, but wouldn’t ya know it, they knock it over on the regular. Little shits.

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      • Dear Wendy

        Wendy February 18, 2012, 8:50 am

        Actually, that was the wrong link. These are what we got (but in wood, which they seem to not currently carry):

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      • rainbow

        rainbow February 18, 2012, 2:08 am

        I hadn’t noticed magnets don’t stick to stainless steel. Being the huge nerd that I am this comment was my favorite one this week and made me incredibly happy. I’ll go read Wikipedia for hours and try to stick magnets to my tongue piercing now. Thank you.

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      • avatar

        bethany February 17, 2012, 4:45 pm

        We college magnets too! They’re taking over the fridge (we travel a lot)… Any other ideas of where to put them??

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      • bittergaymark

        bittergaymark February 17, 2012, 5:09 pm

        lets_be_honest: Have you checked out the website Apartment Therapy? If you haven’t, you really should. Great inspiration there.

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest February 17, 2012, 5:17 pm

        LOVE it! Thanks.
        I should share with you a really cheap idea for a bar cart…You know those stands in hotels for your luggage to rest on? Find one of those and a nice mirrored tray to place on it and voila!
        Little Green Notebook is another favorite of mine.

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      • bittergaymark

        bittergaymark February 17, 2012, 7:21 pm

        I like that idea. It’d be a little too short for me as I am 6’4 though. But I bet in the right space that would look really cool.

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      • avatar

        Caris February 19, 2012, 9:39 am

        Is that like 190cm ? Cause that is really tall !

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      • bittergaymark

        bittergaymark February 19, 2012, 3:29 pm

        Yep, that would be me! I’m tall. 🙂

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  • Budj

    Budj February 17, 2012, 2:45 pm

    so the article on Millenials hooking up…did anyone else find that a little loose in their claims? I’m not really sure what they were citing as a correlation to the lack of commitment..I know they cited several examples, but it just seems like speculation without any data?

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    • AnotherElle

      Laura February 18, 2012, 10:00 pm

      Heh, loose + hooking up made me giggle.

      And I agree about the speculation stuff. A lot of the PT blogs I read/have read, though, tend to be that way, though. Like, they rely way more on examples than any hard data. But I also don’t think they’re meant to really answer the questions they pose, just muse on them.

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    • Leroy

      Leroy February 18, 2012, 11:58 pm

      Somehow iPhones and divorce have ruined Millenials for marriage.

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      • avatar

        Caris February 19, 2012, 9:37 am

        Hmm I didn’t read the article but as a millennial who doesn’t do casual relationships and definitely not hook ups I can tell you their article is bogus (?) 😀

        At the same time I don’t think marriage is necessary, I can commit to someone 100% without the help of a legal paper (that is what marriage is to me). All the religious part of a marriage to me doesn’t mean anything cause well, I am not a religious person and I don’t believe in god. That said, marriage means a lot to my bf so I am willing to get married to make him happy.

        Side note: I do not own an iPhone or any other kind of smart phone, I have a very old Nokia which I can use to send and receive messages and that is all I need. And my parents got divorced when I was 16 (I think I was 16 I don’t really remember when they got divorced). I came to the conclusion that I was meh about marriage when I was 12 though.

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      • Leroy

        Leroy February 19, 2012, 4:23 pm

        I’m sure that you’d think differently if you had an iPhone 😉

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      • avatar

        Caris February 19, 2012, 8:33 pm

        Hmmm I don’t know 😛 They are awfully expensive though (at least here in Argentina). I’d rather use that kind of money for something else.

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    • CatsMeow

      CatsMeow February 19, 2012, 11:54 am

      Yeah, I don’t think I’m a fan of these Psychology Today articles. I’m not sure what kind of a point they’re even trying to make. Our parents’ marriages might influence our own relationships? GROUNDBREAKING.

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    • avatar

      Caris February 19, 2012, 9:09 pm

      I just read the article…Eh, to me the whole thing didn’t make a lot of sense, they way the author connected things was weird to me. It could have been written in a better way, with more hard facts and data really.

      And I don’t think it is just parenting and technology that have an influence. They didn’t take into account that nowadays marriage is not the only option for people, specially women, for example.

      I also didn’t really catch how the woman waving the phone in front of the baby was related to the whole hook-up thing… I don’t know

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  • avatar

    LolaBeans February 17, 2012, 2:49 pm

    Your place is so gorgeous wendy and you have really made it your own. i find as a renter, that is sometimes really hard to do.

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  • avatar

    Something More February 17, 2012, 3:15 pm

    I love the postcard idea. My boyfriend and I (and his parents and brother) went on a cruise through the Mediterranean about a year and a half ago and I’ve been trying to come up with a cool way to display some of the pictures we took.

    Yes – I still haven’t put them up. Hell, I haven’t printed any of them. I need to find a local Procrastinators Anonymous* around here somewhere… at some point.

    *Holy eff balls! I looked up “procrastinators” because I’m a horrible speller and PA is a thing! Like, an actual group. Color me hella surprised.

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  • avatar

    Sue Jones February 17, 2012, 3:53 pm

    Very pretty home!

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  • bittergaymark

    bittergaymark February 17, 2012, 4:03 pm

    Very stylish! Not sure what I like best though… That amazing vintage Asian Art? Or should I go with the old school fan? The standing bar cart is all wonderfully Mad Men. (Joan would be very proud!) And the spindly plant gives off a nifty bonsai vibe… Which reminds me, what kind of plant is that? I don’t recognize it…

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    • Dear Wendy

      Wendy February 17, 2012, 4:24 pm

      I’m not sure what the plant is called — it (and the pot it’s in) were a housewarming gift from some friends. I just noticed that Miles has eaten a big chunk of one of the leaves (as you can see in the photo).

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      • bittergaymark

        bittergaymark February 17, 2012, 4:29 pm

        Ah, cool. Your friend has great taste. PS — The little red table it sits on is very cool as well.

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      • avatar

        bethany February 17, 2012, 4:48 pm

        The plant to the right of the bar cart? Looks like aloe to me.

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      • avatar

        bethany February 17, 2012, 4:48 pm

        Nevermind- you mean the one with the big broad leaves that the cat has clearly chomped on! No idea what that one is.

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    • rainbow

      rainbow February 18, 2012, 2:14 am

      It looks like some kind of begonia. The pattern looks just like begonia maculata. The leaves are a bit too round, but I bet they’re from the same family.

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  • avatar

    Anna February 17, 2012, 4:21 pm

    I love your wood floors! I am one of those people who despises carpet…hate it hate it hate it. My apartment is almost completely carpeted. We rented it 6 1/2 yrs ago because it is the only apartment we’ve ever seen that includes a garage and a porch, and where the landlord doesn’t care if we have a broken car on jackstands in the driveway consistently. When I have my dream home someday, there will be no carpeting to be found, just dark hardwood floors with a few pretty throw rugs.

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    • avatar

      iseeshiny February 17, 2012, 8:14 pm

      I hate carpeting too! I always had it growing up and it’s like, a knee jerk thing for me to worry about keeping it clean, even in someone else’s house. Hardwood is sooooo much better both aesthetically and for my allergies – it was amazing how much my sinuses cleared up once we moved to a house with wood floors. (Although I will say hardwood + dog = vacuuming up pet hair every single day. Because enough fur to make another dog collects in the corners by the time I get home from work. I only used to do it once a week – maybe that’s why my allergies are better.)

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    • rainbow

      rainbow February 18, 2012, 2:18 am

      Ugh! Carpet. I once adopted a lady cat who had five kittens on mine. They spent two months messing it up until we found homes for them. That was horrible.

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  • MELH

    MELH February 17, 2012, 4:46 pm

    Love your apartment Wendy! You have great decorating style!

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  • Leroy

    Leroy February 17, 2012, 5:29 pm

    >> The standing bar cart is all wonderfully Mad Men.

    Yes – The rolling booze cart is a nice touch. You could harness that chubby cat and have him pull it around at parties.

    Here’s a question – is Dear Sugar a real advice column, because all the letters read as though they’re written by Dear Sugar + they’re a little too pat.

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    • avatar

      The Other Me February 17, 2012, 8:17 pm

      Advice columnists often edit letters to make them more concise and readable.

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      • Leroy

        Leroy February 17, 2012, 9:14 pm

        I know, but if that’s the case then Dear Sugar is being a little heavy handed in their editing. I mean the similarities are down to sentence length.

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  • avatar

    lets_be_honest February 17, 2012, 7:03 pm

    We should do a DW home tours edition.

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    • bittergaymark

      bittergaymark February 17, 2012, 9:16 pm

      that would be an interesting thread.

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    • avatar

      Addie Pray February 18, 2012, 9:48 am

      Let’s! Except how do you post pictures?

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      • avatar

        Caris February 18, 2012, 12:09 pm

        You send them via email to Wendy and then she posts them?

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      • bittergaymark

        bittergaymark February 19, 2012, 3:31 pm

        This could be such a fun idea… I’d totally submit pictures of my mad pad.

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        lets_be_honest February 19, 2012, 10:02 pm

        I’m in! Even one thread of everyone’s places would be cool. Get to see where everyone DWs from! (DW is a verb,right?)

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      • avatar

        Addie Pray February 19, 2012, 10:07 pm

        It’s totally a verb.

        And I love this idea. It will be like a “Reader of the Week[‘s Home Tour]” category! I’d need to pick up a bit first. … But I’m game! I can show off this green antique desk I bought that I’m in love with… and that is holding my TV.

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    • Budj

      Budj February 20, 2012, 8:57 am

      I’m only ok with this if it were to be called “DW Cribs”

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      • avatar

        Addie Pray February 20, 2012, 9:03 am

        Me likey.

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  • katie

    katie February 17, 2012, 10:04 pm

    i am very jealous of people who know how to decorate their houses/apartments. i have no style- period. clothes, my hair, my apartment. i just dont understand it i guess.

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    • AnotherElle

      Laura February 18, 2012, 9:39 pm

      So with you there.

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  • I'm An Earth Rocker!

    Miss V February 18, 2012, 12:12 am

    Very nice home! Lol I just painted my room the same light green, have my parent’s china cabinet & glassware, and also have hardwood floors t/o. Love your wallart, too! I would love it if you added a home decor thread; I’ve been goin buck wild the past 2 years redoing all kinds of things in my house. My arms are still sore from grouting my new slate tile section. I’d love to see more of your home as well as others. Thanks for sharing 😀

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  • avatar

    taylor February 18, 2012, 2:42 am

    I’m so glad you included Sugar’s identity link! I was counting down the days to the unveiling… It was a weird experience finding out who she is…. Her columns are probably the most beautifully written columns I’ve ever read…

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  • avatar

    Caris February 18, 2012, 10:33 am

    Is the link for “Marriage Won’t Make You Happier” not working for anyone else?

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