I have never been so hurt and sad in my life. This situation showed me he doesn’t care about me. I just want to know if I should continue to be with him? And if he ever truly cared about me? — Feeling Abandoned
No, you should not be with him, and, no, he doesn’t care about you very much (if at all). Make no mistake: He wanted you to have the abortion. He did not want to have a baby with you and become a father. But he also had no problem at all letting you deal with the emotional and physical effects of that decision on your own. He felt morally conflicted enough about the decision to avoid any sense of responsibility and ownership of it — giving you that role, solely, and without any support — but will embrace the relief that the pregnancy is terminated. Frankly, he’s a scumbag — one of the lowest of the lows, and, no, you should not be with him.
I hope his behavior isn’t making you question your decision. It sounds like your feelings of conflict are directed solely at him, but if that isn’t the case and you’re feeling conflicted around your decision to terminate your pregnancy, please seek support in caring sources: Ask your clinic or doctor for a referral for counseling; talk to close friends; reach out for online support in safe virtual spaces like this abortion support forum or this after-abortion support group. Your dickhead boyfriend’s deplorable behavior is a reflection on him — his weak character — not on you. You’re going to be ok. You’re going to be so much better without him than you ever would be with him.
If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at [email protected].