He was diagnosed with agoraphobia and severe anxiety a few years ago. Since meeting me, his agoraphobia is now non-existent and his anxiety has toned down soooooo much. He lived with his parents for 29 years because of these issues and is finally getting on with his life with me. Lately (within the last 2 to 3 weeks), he has been shutting me out, getting angry with me and acting so immature and childish. do NOT know what to do anymore. His mom said he has been like this all his life, but since I have known him he has not acted like that towards me until recently.
He is lazy, he doesn’t bathe, and he doesn’t even want to go on walks anymore or do ANYTHING with me. He sleeps 18 hours a day. He has angry outbursts and tells me to fuck off and leave, so of course, my reaction is to cry because my feelings are hurt. In return, he screams at me some more. He has no respect for me at all. He doesn’t do a damn thing during the day and when I want to take a day off from cooking or cleaning, I get told by him that I am lazy and a slob.
Because of his “mental illness” and anger issues, he hasn’t been able to keep a job. He is on beta blockers for his anxiety and refuses, I mean REFUSES, to go to the doctor to get on another medication or get re-diagnosed. He says he would rather be single than to have to take another pill. I have worked my ass off since I was of legal age to work, and I have made it clear to him that I will not support him and he needs to get a job when he comes to the US because I will ship him right back to his mommy if he thinks he can laze around.
I truly believe he will get a job and keep it because I have talked to him about these issues. However, just tonight I was telling him a funny story from when I was in college (I’m 27 by the way) and I said something like “this guy would come over a lot to the apartment to see my roommates,” and my husband interrupted me and said “he would CUM a lot, would he?” and he just laughed. I ignored him and continued on. Then he interrupted me again, pointed to a TV show where a dad was teaching his son how to shave, and said, “Ha, they are gay…he wants to get him into bed, doesn’t he?” WTF is wrong with my husband?!
His mom and dad have both told me he has a fucked-up personality, but this is just too much to deal with day after day. I try to ignore him, but it doesn’t work. I try to talk to him about it, but he doesn’t give a shit. I have told him nicely (and firmly too) that he is being rude, and he tells me to shut up and fuck off. He told me tonight that if I don’t like who he is, he will never change for me and to fuck off and go back home. He apologized after, but I am getting tired of it and, honestly, I have seriously considered, and am still considering, leaving him. Do you think I should? — Married to Psychopath
If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at firstname.lastname@example.org.