Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

My 12 Favorite Posts of 2012

As the year winds to a close and most of us look forward to taking next week off — including me! I’m going to wrap up posting for the year this Friday — I thought I’d share some of my favorite posts of 2012, from columns to essays and everything in between.

“My New Boyfriend is Having a Baby with Someone Else”
This was one of those columns where I liked the writing and the message of both the letter and my response. I hope it helped people. I hope some of you recognized yourself and found some comfort in the reminder that none of us has a “perfect” love story in the traditional sense of the idea and that happiness exists in many forms.

“Roller Derby Has Made me Too Masculine for Men”
It’s just a funny one.

My Fiancé’s Groomsman Has No Teeth!
Who doesn’t love this one, amiright?

“When Breastfeeding Doesn’t Work”
I’m in such a different head space now than I was when I wrote this. I remember how difficult and therapeutic it was for me to get this all down in writing. I re-read it and want to hug that woman and tell her to give herself a break. If I ever have another baby, no way am I putting myself through that horrible guilt and NO WAY will I ever, ever let another woman — or man — make me feel guilty about the way I nourish my child.

What it’s Like to be a Woman in America in 2012
Instant classic, maybe?

Song and Dance by Jackson and Wendy
This was at the height of my feeling nutso. My thyroid condition was out of whack as my post-partum hormones continued raging on, I was exhausted from lack of sleep, and Jackson was going through a transition where he stopped napping for a few days. I listen to my voice and can hear all the crazy, but I also hear the love. And look at how little and sweet Jackson was!

15 Things Every Couple MUST Discuss Before Getting Married
I love when I have a listicle like this one that I can send to about 40% of the people who write to me for advice and know the answer to their issue can be found right here.

50 Life Skills Every Modern Woman Should Know
This was kind of a labor of love, so I have to include it in the year-end round-up. Plus, it’s worth re-visiting from time to time.

Alphabet: A History, (M)
One of my favorite alphabet pieces. Sometimes, when I write these I feel like I’m right back in that head space and that time in my life I’m trying to describe. This is one of those times, and it felt good to re-connect with that former self.

We Don’t Let Go
I wrote this when I started hitting my stride in new motherhood. I no longer felt so crazy, my hormones were settling down, and Jackson and I had really bonded. I read this and I feel love, love, love.

Getting Personal: “My Life as a Prison Wife”
This was so interested to read and edit and I’m really honored the author shared her story with us. She hasn’t been around (at least in the comments or forums) lately and I’m curious how she’s doing now that her husband is home. Hope all is well.

Getting Personal: “Children Aren’t for Me”
This was, I think, the third piece this particular contributor wrote for the site and not only am I a fan of her writing, I thought this essay was a good balance to all the motherhood posts I’ve shared this year and gave voice to many women who feel the same way — that kids are nice but not for them.

Is your favorite on the list?

24 comments… add one
  • Fabelle

    Fabelle December 18, 2012, 1:04 pm

    Pantless drunky!

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      Addie Pray December 18, 2012, 2:47 pm

      Classic. I bet that LW never guessed we’d all fall for Ramona!

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    lets_be_honest December 18, 2012, 1:12 pm

    Honeybeenicki has been in the forums I think. Hope she gives us an update.

    In other news, no DW for a week?! Worst Christmas present everrr. Just kidding, Happy Holidays to you, Drew and Jackson.

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      GatorGirl December 18, 2012, 1:53 pm

      Oh goodness a whole week off!? What am I going to do all day?

      But seriously enjoy the time off Wendy, you deserve it!!

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    • Dear Wendy

      Wendy December 18, 2012, 2:08 pm

      Thanks! And sorry to say, but it’s actually going to be a week and a half that I’ll be away from DW! (I’ll be back with new content on 1/2/13). Gotta re-charge and fill my creative well — it’s been feeling a little low lately.

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    kerrycontrary December 18, 2012, 1:16 pm

    Are we still doing the booklist? pleaseeee I need holiday reading.

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    • Dear Wendy

      Wendy December 18, 2012, 2:07 pm

      You know, I actually only got one or two emails from people, so I don’t have enough suggestions to make a list. Best to go back to that original post and see what people recommend in the comments. Also, you could ask for suggestions in the forums (try the ‘general chat’ forum).

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      Christy December 18, 2012, 2:12 pm

      You interested in fiction or nonfiction? I’ve just started a Amazon wishlist that has some pretty awesome books on it. I could share it with you on facebook?

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      • MaterialsGirl

        MaterialsGirl December 18, 2012, 2:56 pm

        If you haven’t read Lisa See’s other books, I would suggest those. Also.. How to be a woman!

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        kerrycontrary December 18, 2012, 3:38 pm

        I have How to be a woman on my amazon wishlist. Maybe I’ll try that. @Christy I like fiction

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        kerrycontrary December 18, 2012, 3:44 pm

        Oh and yes please share via FB. I have a pretty big wishlist as well, but I love new ideas. Like I said, I’m a librarian but I kind of suck at browsing books. I need people to tell me what to read. Like a drone.

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    • CatsMeow

      CatsMeow December 18, 2012, 4:05 pm

      I put Gone Girl on my Xmas list per many DWers’ suggestions. I’m sure everyone else has read it at this point.

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    • Amybelle

      Amybelle December 18, 2012, 8:34 pm

      My suggestions:
      11/22/63 Stephen King
      Fingersmith Sarah Waters
      Outlander Diana Gabaldon
      Kushiel’s Dart Jacqueline Carey
      The Night Circus (can’t rem author)
      Tully Paullina Simmons

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    Addie Pray December 18, 2012, 2:52 pm

    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year’s in advance, Wendy Bo Bendy! (I dunno.) Have fun in the Lou with your family (including my favorite Wendy’s Dad!). There’s a *small* chance I’ll be in the Lou at some point over the next 1.5 weeks. If so, do you think you could bring Jackson to the Imo’s in Webster Groves? That’s where I spend a lot of time when I go to the Lou….

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    • Dear Wendy

      Wendy December 18, 2012, 3:04 pm

      That would be fun.

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    • CatsMeow

      CatsMeow December 18, 2012, 4:04 pm

      St. Louis DW Imo’s meetup? I AM SO THERE.

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    sarolabelle December 18, 2012, 4:41 pm

    Maybe you could schedule these columns to rerun on your days off? So at least we “think” we have something new to look at.

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  • Lyra

    L December 18, 2012, 5:20 pm

    I reread the 15 things every couple should discuss before marriage post and I realize though my ex and I discussed most all of those things, we disagreed on about half of them which is obviously not a good sign. It’s amazing how much you realize when you’re out of a relationship.

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    Painted_lady December 18, 2012, 7:26 pm

    I hate to be all Mean Girls about the toothless groomsman, but I love how she chimed in in the comments and was like, “Y’all are soooo mean for saying I’m an asshole! You did this once before when I wrote in! Why do you guys say I’m an asshole? That’s mean!” and everyone told her, “Maybe you’re asshole?” And then she went on about how mean we were for calling her an asshole.

    BTW, Wendy, can you tell us who she was? Was she the picture-destroyer? I bet she was. Similar writing style. Can you just say yes if I guess right?

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    • katie

      katie December 18, 2012, 8:27 pm

      That was an intense dw day…

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      Addie Pray December 18, 2012, 10:17 pm

      I second the motion to reveal what other the Toothless Groomsman LW wrote. In the bylaws of DW, now Wendy must answer.

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      Temperance December 19, 2012, 11:22 am

      I think she’s the person whose mother-in-law was staying with them because she couldn’t hold down a job. The post was about her mother-in-law taking a box of shot glasses to Goodwill, but the entire thing showed how much she resented her.

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    Megan_A_Mess December 18, 2012, 11:51 pm

    My top two were on the list! Yay! The first was “Children aren’t for me”. I know it wasn’t the first thing that I ever commented on, but I do remember it was ONE of the first. I was so glad that someone wrote about it, in such a positive way, and so many other people commented on it, and were very … how should we say, diplomatic about it. I expected a lot of backlash, but after seeing the wide variety of comments, is what made me feel confident about sticking around the DW community.

    The second was “My life as a prison wife”. That one really opened my mind because like the author, I too have a list of things I won’t tolerate (abuse, drugs, and jail.) She was very insightful and honest about her experiences, and that’s really all I can say about it. I haven’t been in the forum too much, so I guess I’ve missed her postings, but I too would love an update from her to see how things are going.

    Enjoy your time off, Wendy! Enjoy the holidays and we’ll see you next year!

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    Temperance December 19, 2012, 11:34 am

    I was really hoping for an update from “Toothless Groomsmen”.

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