Over Christmas last year, I began realizing that my SIL was feeding me with false information and trying to cause conflict between me and my MIL. I ended up seeing my doctor as I became depressed. I couldn’t figure out why my SIL was doing this!! I recorded some of the conversations we had to show my MIL what had been going on. She couldn’t believe herself what had been happening, but I had the proof!! I thought finally I had an answer to my problems with the MIL, but then she told my SIL what I had done and my SIL then started bullying me, and I tried to commit suicide.
I was in a place where I knew no matter what I did my MIL was never going to listen to me. So, after a while of her not seeing the kids because I was ill and she would have made me worse if I had had any sort of contact with her, her mom died and I felt sorry for her, so I asked her if she would like to see my children. And she let them down!! So I, again, stopped letting her have contact with my children because I didn’t want them upset and let down again.
At my MIL’s mother’s funeral, she picked an argument with me and her family attacked me while she held onto my arms! And now I never want her near my children. She is a liar, a bully, a violent person and she has no interest in the kids’ well-being! I have received no apology for what she did, and she has continued to lie to everyone about what happened that day although I have proof of what she did. She has written me a letter saying I either let her see my children or she will take me to court. I don’t need this stress and I definitely don’t want her around my children or me!! What should I do? — Depressed Over MIL’s Behavior
Where is your partner/husband in all of this? His wife/ mother of his two young kids tries to kill herself over the way his mother and family are treating her and his reaction doesn’t even warrant a mention here? I mean, WTF all over the place. Your MIL and SIL sound like real treats, but the truth is you’re emotionally unstable and need professional help. There’s no reason a bitchy MIL should push you so far over the edge you try to commit suicide. There’s something else going on.
Please, please seek help. Get a referral from your doctor for a psychiatrist or psychologist. Sit down with your partner and express to him how anxious and depressed you are. Let him deal with his mother. There’s no reason you need to be in her presence if she makes you this crazy. Pass the reins over to your partner, and let him work out any visitation between her and your two kids. And if you absolutely don’t want her anywhere near your children, tell your partner to keep her away. His mother, his problem. And unless you have broken the law, your MIL — who is really only your mother-in-law if you are legally married to her son (or daughter, if that’s the case) — can threaten to take you to court all she wants, but she has no basis for any claim. Stop letting her threaten you!
But, really, get help. Immediately. Not only is YOUR life very important, but you owe it to your two children to get it together.
If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at firstname.lastname@example.org.