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“I Hate my Sister’s Fiancé”

Three months ago, my sister (25) met a guy (30) through a blind date and apparently hit it off. I met him and didn’t like him. He wasn’t an interesting person. He seemed entirely too comfortable in my sisters’ apartment where I was temporarily staying. He put his bare feet up on the coffee table, which I found gross and disrespectful. And he really didn’t speak to me. He was so into my sister, but he didn’t ask me anything about myself, which I thought was disrespectful. A few days later they were “in love.” I later found out (through our other sister) that soon after they met, he got a biggish tattoo on his chest that was associated with her and she got a small corresponding tattoo. I find this crazy.

A month after they met, they got engaged. I cried when I found out. They had an engagement party in our hometown and I truly didn’t want to go. I had to take a plane trip to be there for one night. It seemed stupid. I told my sister I didn’t want to go, but she kept asking me to, so eventually I just went. Luckily, I had a date to it. If I hadn’t had a date, I honestly wouldn’t have gone.

My family is close and I find it incredibly repulsive and disrespectful that this guy now feels he is part of it. We have another sister and I know she doesn’t like him, either. He’s just so lame. I’ve hung around them a bunch of times and I have never heard anything unique or interesting come out of his mouth. He is very superficial. He loves shopping (which I find weird in a straight man).

It makes me sad and a bit troubled because I love my sister and I don’t want this to affect us. Lately, I’ve hardly been spending any time with her. Soon after I met her fiancé, she even asked me if I liked him and I was honest and said no. Every time I see him, I like him less. He just annoys me. I find him very presumptuous and disrespectful.

Recently, he did something that really pissed me off. We were talking about dogs and he said he wanted a french bulldog (how original; every guy wants that dog) and I said I would tell him what kind of dog I wanted, but he had to promise he wouldn’t want it. It’s not a common breed. Well, recently, I was at their house, and I overheard that he wants the dog that I want. I immediately got very angry. Apparently, my face turned red. I told him he better not get that dog. He is so pathetic! What is wrong with him?! I’m not going to be seeing him again if I can help it. What is your objective advice? — Uncommon Breed

You use the word “disrespectful” three times in your letter to describe your sister’s fiancé, which is ironic since it’s a word that could just as easily be used to describe the way you’ve treated him and his relationship with your sister. Most of his “offenses” — being comfortable in his girlfriend’s home, liking to shop, and getting a tattoo associated with someone he likes — aren’t offenses at all, but completely harmless aspects of his personality you’re uncomfortable with for your own personal reasons. Yes, failing to engage you in conversation is “lame,” but after getting a taste of your attitude toward him, I have to wonder if he wasn’t just protecting himself from further judgment or harassment.

As for him wanting a dog that you also want, regardless of how “uncommon” the breed is, all I have to say about that is: grow the hell up. Neither one of you said you were actually going to get the dog — just that maybe you’d like to one day. And so what if you both got the same kind of pet? For someone who’s accusing another person of being “very superficial,” you certainly seem to liken dogs — living, breathing beings — to accessories you hope make you stand out.

As mean and juvenile as your letter was, the part that stood out the most was when you said you wouldn’t have gone to your sister’s engagement party if you hadn’t had a date. And her fiancé is the pathetic one? Unbelievable.

Look, we’re not always going to like or connect with the people our friends and loved ones end up with. That’s just a fact of life. Does that have potential to make future get-togethers less fun? Sure. But it isn’t about us. We’re not the ones who will spend our lives with those significant others, and what matters most is not that we have a good time with them or feel comfortable in their presence, but that they make our loved ones happy — that they treat them well, respect them, and have the ability to make their lives more rewarding. Nothing in your letter indicates that that isn’t the case with your sister’s fiancé, so my suggestion is to suck it up, quit being a big baby, and deal with the fact that your sister is in love and planning to spend her life with this man. If you want to be part of that life, quit acting like a brat and celebrate the love your sister has found, even if the man she’s found it with isn’t someone whom you’d pick for her. If you’re so sure you can find someone better, focus your energy on finding him for yourself. Reading between the lines here, it seems like that’s what would truly make you feel better about your sister’s upcoming marriage.

*If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, send me your letters at wendy@dearwendy.com and be sure to follow me on Twitter.


Comments on this entry are closed.

leilani leilani March 6, 2012, 9:03 am

Wow. Grow the eff up.

avatar The_Yellow_Dart March 6, 2012, 9:10 am

I’m curious about the LW’s age. That might explain a lot…

avatar The_Yellow_Dart March 6, 2012, 9:12 am

And Wendy’s advice is spot on as usual…

avatar silver_dragon_girl March 6, 2012, 9:12 am

I’m guessing 16, from this sound of it.

Leroy Leroy March 6, 2012, 9:20 am

That is so DISRESPECTFUL! – and totally repugnant and unoriginal, because I was wondering exactly the same. The LW is all about RESPECT. DO NOT show her your bare feet!

avatar The_Yellow_Dart March 6, 2012, 9:59 am


avatar CG March 6, 2012, 9:43 am

I’m getting the feeling this letter isn’t real. It’s just too over-the-top with the “He is so pathetic!” and “What’s wrong with him?!” I think, or at least I hope, Wendy got a super-early April Fool’s letter.

Budj Budj March 6, 2012, 9:45 am

I wondered the same thing…

avatar Samantha March 6, 2012, 12:22 pm

I’d agree with both CG and Budj about it being fake, except that I’ve met a person or two like this. Wendy’s advice was great, and I hope the LW takes it to heart. Otherwise, living life being that judgmental could become exhausting.

avatar Jiggs March 6, 2012, 10:02 pm

Yeah, my first thought was “this LW is clearly a teenager”. If not, she needs some serious therapy.

avatar Emma March 7, 2012, 2:24 am

For some reason, I was sure that this letter was written by a male. Am I the only one who thinks the writing seems to be coming from a guy? (Not dissing guys or anything, just think the style and wording seems like it was written by a man.)

avatar Jiggs March 7, 2012, 3:14 pm

I don’t know, I read it as female. Especially the dog thing, “don’t copy meeeeee!” being such an intense touchpoint of growing up female in my experience. YMMV, though.

iwannatalktosampson Iwannatalktosampson March 6, 2012, 9:13 am

Wow you seem really petty. He’s not interesting enough for you? No big deal, you’re not marrying him. He wants the same dog as you? What a jerk! This reminds me things girls do in high school – like ugh I used to be obsessed with victoria secret lip gloss and now she wears it allll the time – she’s like sooooo obsessed with me.

Clearly you haven’t given this guy a chance – but if your family is as close as you say they are you might want to try your very very hardest to find at least one thing you like about him or you risk alienating your sister.

And by the way for all the name calling you throw around about him – presumptuous, annoying, gross, disrespectful – I can think of equally as many bad names to call you at the moment. But I won’t. I just really hope you work on getting your own life so you don’t get your panties all in a bunch about this.

Oh and really? The deciding factor in going to your sisters engagement party was that you had a date? Quality.

iwannatalktosampson Iwannatalktosampson March 6, 2012, 9:24 am

Ugh I didn’t see Wendy answered this one before I did and I like totally copied her. I hope she’s not mad.

avatar utopiaballroom March 6, 2012, 9:41 am


avatar lets_be_honest March 6, 2012, 12:03 pm

I’m honestly wondering if the LW even knows what any of those words mean that she used to describe him.

I’m actually disappointed this was such a joke of a letter because I was hoping for some good insight on how to deal with my sister’s long term boyfriend who I hate because he actually is a jerk. If I had enough coffee, I’d describe what a real jerk is to the LW.

avatar JB March 6, 2012, 12:08 pm

I also was hoping for Wendy’s insight on dealing with someone who is actually a jerk. My little sister is living with and soon-to-be engaged to someone that the whole family severely dislikes. Disappointed in the LW for such superficial reasons to dislike someone.

avatar 6napkinburger March 7, 2012, 1:12 pm

I agree with this hope. My cousin is marrying someone who sucks at life. In most ways. I’m happy she’s happy but I am so disappointed for her — she is smart and hilarious and he is… boorish and blah. Not “blah” in the quiet and contimplative way that she needs to allow her to shine and offers her amazing support and love, and is secretly hilarious when they are alone. Nope, not that. He is immature and tries to be funny by insulting people and is going nowhere in his career and brings up awkward and controversial topics at OUR family events because he thinks its entertaining to watch on and on, and I just am sad about it.

I know in my case, there isn’t anything I can do and I will just have to suck it up and get over it. But I truly am disappointed FOR her because I feel like she is missing out on this potential amazing life she could have had with someone better matched because she feels like she has to get married RIGHT NOW (her two sisters did, last year and the year before and her family loves to joke that its “her turn”). So sometimes the feeling isn’t petty; its a legitimate reason to feel disappointed. (Though not necessarily a legitimate reason to do anything else other than feel.) And dealing with that (and succeeding in keeping your mouth shut) sucks.

Just Max Just Max March 6, 2012, 9:14 am


avatar evanscr05 March 6, 2012, 9:23 am

That was my thought when I finished reading it. Most. Ridiculous. Letter. Evah.

Just Max Just Max March 6, 2012, 9:35 am

I know! I’m still scratching my head over this one. :-/

Moneypenny Moneypenny March 6, 2012, 6:05 pm

That is *exactly* what I kept saying to myself as I was reading!

JK JK March 6, 2012, 9:15 am

Thank you Wendy!!!
This letter reeked of envy/jealousy: LW, instead of looking for every “defect” you can in your sister´s fiance, why not try looking for someone yourself?

That being said, I totally agree that it sounds like this r/ship is going WAY too fast (engaged at 1 month???)

Jessibel5 Jessibel March 6, 2012, 10:32 am

Haha, this letter kept making me think of one of those hilarious e-cards I saw, you know the ones with the old timey drawings? It said something like “When you hate someone, everything they do is offensive. Like, look at that b- over there eating crackers like she owns the place!” She hates him for reasons that have nothing to do with what she wrote in about, the annoyances are just symptoms of the hate. He obviously loves her sister and their life seems like a fairytale right now, right? This letter reeked of jealousy (the tell? How she said she wouldn’t have gone to the engagement party if she hadn’t had a date.) She wants what her sister has, and this guy embodies it, and she hates him because of that. Thus, anything he does is going to annoy her and make her hate him more.

Oh, and by the way LW? You obviously asked someone to be your date to the party, so don’t act all like you were FORCED to go just because you had a date. Look, this might be happening too fast and you’re sister’s gotten caught up in it. I’ve known people who’ve gotten married after a few months and they’ve been happily married many years. I’ve also known people who have gotten married after a few months and it crashed and burned gloriously. We’re all hoping that your sister’s case is the former. But if it’s the latter, you can’t pull an “I told you so.” She’ll be in enough pain and be embarrassed enough. She’s an adult and she knows what she’s doing, and if she makes a mistake, she makes a mistake. You have to let her make it. Then you support her because you’re her sister, and you love her. Also, maybe his wanting the same type of dog as you was his attempt to become closer to you, did you ever think of it that way? And you know, hating someone for what type of dog they want is super judgemental and kind of mean. I’ve also never known a guy who actually wanted a French Bulldog, so I don’t know where you’re getting the idea that every guy in the world wants one.

avatar rachel March 6, 2012, 10:45 am

Haha, I think your e-card reference is spot on. And I thought the same thing about the dog. French bulldogs are a small breed – I would in fact say that most guys wouldn’t pick that dog.

avatar GatorGirl March 6, 2012, 11:04 am

“When you hate someone, everything they do is offensive. Like, look at that b- over there eating crackers like she owns the place!”

Love that e-card and it is so spot on for this letter!

avatar emjay March 6, 2012, 5:37 pm

I was thinking jealousy too. But in the aspect that the sister found someone and the LW has not. Or that the LW really is jealous thatshe didn’t find this guy first so she is coming up with stupid reasons not to like him. Jealousy is the green eyed monster! And this girl reeks of it!

avatar LTC039 March 6, 2012, 9:23 am

There was nothing in the letter than gave any concrete, legitimate reasons as to why this guy is as horrible as you think he is. Yeah, I think it’s a bit crazy that they got engaged a month after they met & got matching tattoos, but unfortunately it’s done. It is what it is. Yes you may hate the guy (for w/e unclear reasons) but that’s who your sister is happy with. If you love your sister then you need to accept him. He makes her happy & newsflash SHE is the one marrying him, not you. You just need to focus that.
I think all the other points in your letter were vague & a little immature. So he out his feet up on the coffee table? OK? Yeah, maybe in most conventional social behaviors that is a little rude, but that is not a legitimate reason to hate the guy. If he was verbally/physically abusive, or a cheater, or any other aspect in that realm, then ok, I’d get you. But he chose the breed of dog you want? Millions upon millions of people have the same breeds of dogs & just bc he changed his mind to what you mentioned, does not prohibit you from getting the dog.
All I got from this letter is he’s not very social, but again, not a reason to hate him.
Regardless, he is part of your family now. Your sister has chosen to marry him & there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it. SO suck it up, be happy for your sister (just for the mere fact that she is happy at this point) & let it go.
Stop being so petty & look at the bigger picture… If you don’t you WILL screw up your relationship w/ your sister bc at the end of the day, she WILL choose him over you.

avatar ReginaRey March 6, 2012, 9:24 am

LW – The problem I perceive with your letter isn’t that you don’t have some valid concerns; it’s that all of you valid concerns are going to be forgotten amid all of the totally immature, nasty and pretty pointless thoughts you have about your sister’s fiance.

If my sibling were to get engaged to someone they’d only been dating for a month, I’d be pretty concerned, too! I’d be very worried that they hadn’t had enough time to get to know someone before committing to spending their lives with them. I’d be very concerned that they hadn’t discussed things that are crucial to a marriage – finances, children, values, morals, etc. – and that they hadn’t known each other long enough to develop the kind of solid foundation necessary to weather through difficult times; or to simply just understand how to best communicate with each other. I’d be very worried that they were punch-drunk on the *feeling* of love, and that they hadn’t given it time to see if it was a lasting love, or just the excitement of new love making them act prematurely.

And if I were having those feelings, I’d have sat my sibling down and calmly and rationally explained why I was concerned. I might not expect my words to have much impact, but I would try, anyway, without being too accusatory.

But the issue is, you’ve completely dashed any chance you had of actually making some valid points to your sister and her fiance…by complaining about her engagement party; by arguing with him over a dog; by criticizing his tattoo and the fact that he isn’t interesting enough for your tastes. You know, maybe he IS boring. Maybe you find him disrespectful and annoying. Maybe you think the whole relationship is ridiculous and you’re secretly hoping it implodes. But there are certain things you can say, and certain things you can’t. By saying the things you shouldn’t be saying, you completely ruin your credibility in saying the things that DO matter.

Your first concern from here on out should be your sister’s welfare. Does he treat her well? Is the relationship healthy? Abandoning her because you don’t like her fiance won’t do her or you any good if eventually she wants out…and doesn’t have you to turn to. Don’t burn a bridge with your sister over this. Learn how to be supportive even if you can’t agree with her; and learn when to open your mouth…and when to keep it closed.

avatar Addie Pray March 6, 2012, 9:33 am

I wonder if one day I am going to be sick of your perfect comments. I doubt it but it’s possible. I’ll let know if/when that happens.

avatar delilahgem March 7, 2012, 5:07 pm


avatar Morgan March 6, 2012, 9:45 am

Yeah, LW, this. I was basically going to say the same thing, so consider all the above seconded. There are problematic things about your sisters relationship. His taste in dog breed is not one of them.

One thing I did wonder. LW, you mention you were temporarily staying with your sister, when she met this guy, but now you aren’t seeing her very often. I think a big part of this is probably jealousy. You two used to be super close, but now there’s this new guy. Remember that right now your sister is wrapped up in this bubble of new love, added with the bubble of newly engaged. She hasn’t replaced you. As you both get older your relationship will change, but it doesn’t have to change for the worse. You need to seriously get over yourself to avoid that, though.

avatar Guy Friday March 6, 2012, 9:50 am

I don’t disagree with you, except for one point: I don’t get from the letter that this LW has any issue with her sister getting engaged after one month, but just that she has an issue with her sister getting engaged to HIM after one month. And I think that’s what bothers me most about this letter: that she honestly doesn’t seem to have any actual issue with the guy beyond just hating him for the sake of hating him.

I’d be VERY interested to find out the age of the LW and the non-engaged sister, because I think I would be a lot less annoyed with the LW if she was, say, 15-16 as opposed to college-aged. As a teenager, she may not know any better; as an adult, I’d kind of want to verbally slap her upside the head for being this petty.

avatar ReginaRey March 6, 2012, 9:54 am

Yeah, you’re right…it’s like she doesn’t even know what she really SHOULD be concerned about, and only focuses on the superficial, which is something I’d expect if she were a teenager.

avatar Addie Pray March 6, 2012, 9:56 am

I think that’s the point – if the LW has concerns about the marriage, it should be about things like them getting engaged after 1 month. Maybe at the core that is what is bothering this LW but it’s bubbling up in these silly petty points. Kind of like when you’re really upset with someone and you go off on something that is really not the issue… I think sometimes people have a hard time even understanding what their real issue is – they are just overcome with frustration/anger/sadness that they lose sight of what is really at issue. And I think Regina’s comment is probably the most constructive because it will help real in the LW and try to focus on the core issues that is troubling her. I mean, surely it’s not the fact that he is talking about getting a French bulldog…

avatar Addie Pray March 6, 2012, 9:59 am

oh wait, it’s not the french bulldog she’s upset about, it’s the dog she wanted of the very special breed. regardless, surely it’s not about these petty points and there’s something bothering LW that runs deeper…. or not, she could be 13.

Budj Budj March 6, 2012, 10:03 am

I also notice she didn’t tell US what this special breed was so we can’t steal it either…dammit…I must know…

avatar Addie Pray March 6, 2012, 10:05 am

If she’s smart, that very special breed will have some fluffy chow in it.

avatar Morgan March 6, 2012, 2:27 pm

I’m rooting for Tibetan Mastiff, just for the added ridiculousness value of being an unreasonably expensive breed.

Also they look like a lion and a bear had a baby. So there’s that.

avatar lets_be_honest March 6, 2012, 2:31 pm

Well, I just adopted every Tibetan Mastiff in existence. In. Your. Face.

katie katie March 6, 2012, 7:58 pm

gah!! beat me to it, budj! haha

avatar jlyfsh March 6, 2012, 10:15 am

sadly guyfriday i’m going to guess she’s at least in college. she mentions flying home to her hometown for the engagement party. i doubt someone who was young enough to be living at home would phrase it that way.

and i agree with both you and RR at the same time. it does seem like she’s more upset that it’s him she’s moving so fast with, rather than the fact that the relationship is moving so fast in general. it is odd that she didn’t once say anything about the way the fiance treats her sister. which you would think would be important to someone who is really close to their sibling. that was the most important thing to me when my sister married her husband. we’re not exactly best buds but he treats her wonderfully. which in the end should matter more than how interesting and not lame he is.

avatar kittyk March 6, 2012, 1:23 pm

Oh you said it RR! I was thinking the exact same thing- if she had written in concerned for her sister rushing into a relationship and getting engaged after one month- Wendy could have given her some legit advice (though the the advice given is very legit) on how to balance her concerns personally and whether they’re worth expressing to her sister. Advice on how to put her worries aside and just be happy and supportive of her sister even if this is a big mistake.

But no, LW is concerned with this guy feeling comfortable, not being very chatty, and wanting the same dog as her?!? All petty concerns, totally missing the big picture here.

avatar evanscr05 March 6, 2012, 9:24 am

Um, LW, are you 12 or something? Grow the hell up and stop acting like a selfish little brat.

“quit being a big baby” – LOVE this, Wendy!

avatar sarolabelle March 6, 2012, 9:42 am

I think if the LW is 12 then we should all be a little nicer and show her how grownups should act and how a little “respect”

avatar jlyfsh March 6, 2012, 10:04 am

i think anyone who takes a plane trip to their hometown is more than likely very much an adult. what’s sad is she’s still acting like she’s 12.

avatar evanscr05 March 6, 2012, 10:13 am


avatar camille905 March 6, 2012, 9:25 am

This sounds like major jealousy to me. If he treats your sister well and makes her happy, there is NO reason for you to be unhappy. Just because you don’t like him doesn’t give you the right to treat your sister so badly. You will end up alienating your sister if you keep up this behavior. I understand you may think they’re rushing it but that still doesn’t give you the right to judge.

avatar Addie Pray March 6, 2012, 9:27 am

I’ve never understood that jealousy thing where one person declares first that they like X and everyone else is banned from ever getting X. I mean, why is it that you cannot have two X’s? Especially if you like X’s so much, I would assume the more the merrier. Two French bulldogs in the family sounds better than one French bulldog if you ask me! Are you afraid people will think you’re “copying” your brother in law? I’m having flashbacks to 5th grade when my friend Becca apparently bought exclusive rights to Swatch pop watches. I’m sorry, biatch, I got it for Christmas. Take it up with Santa.

avatar ktfran March 6, 2012, 10:18 am

Personally, I prefer O’s.

avatar Addie Pray March 6, 2012, 10:20 am

That’s so unoriginal.

JK JK March 6, 2012, 10:24 am

I mean what woman doesn´t want Os? You´d better not say that you want them now, promise?

avatar camille905 March 6, 2012, 3:21 pm

But I really want some O’s!

avatar ktfran March 6, 2012, 10:27 am


avatar lets_be_honest March 6, 2012, 12:20 pm

Jebus Christmas I love you Addie. I literally LOL’d at this. People in my office think I’m weird now.

avatar Addie Pray March 6, 2012, 2:22 pm

I’m trying to “like” this multiple times but it’s only letting me thumb up you once. Just in case you were wondering why you didn’t already have 100 likes. ;)

avatar ChemE March 6, 2012, 9:27 am

Is this real? I mean you don’t like him because he likes the same dog? Because he didn’t spend his time engaging you and focused on your sister in conversation?

avatar bethany March 6, 2012, 9:28 am

Perfect advice, Wendy!

I read something years and years ago that said that things we dislike in others are often things that we dislike in ourselves– To me it sounds like you’re projecting your issues onto this guy. You think he’s disrespectful? It sounds to me like you’re being disrespectful. It sounds like you’re being jealous and spiteful, too. You think he’s lame, but really, it sounds to me like you’re the lame one, and you’re threatened by him. Grow up.

avatar Buzzelbee March 6, 2012, 9:29 am

I can actually relate to one part of this letter. When my brother and his fiance came to my parent’s house to visit at the same time I was there I thought she was way to comfortable there and trying to take over and it really rubbed me the wrong way. I realized this was probably silly and I talked to my husband about it and quickly realized I was so annoyed because my in-laws had treated me horribly for a long time and I was jealous of someone who seemed to be fitting right in with theirs and felt she wasn’t paying her dues. I didn’t want my family to be horrible to her at all and it was just my issue. Once I realized what it was all about my feelings towards her changed.

So my advice is to realize what this is triggering in your history or current situation, because it isn’t fair to put your issues on someone who makes your sibling happy.

avatar crazyayeaye March 6, 2012, 9:32 am

Love this advice, Wendy!

Heather Heather March 6, 2012, 9:34 am

Yeah, as much as I acknowledge they’re probably moving too fast etc. you are WAY overreacting LW. I’m sorry to be so harsh but your letter just screams juvenile. Grow a pair of lady balls and act like a woman, not a snobby little girl.

avatar EricaSwagger March 6, 2012, 9:36 am

Hahah wow this letter was just awful. I’m going to guess right now that maybe one person out there has anything positive to say to this LW.

The only thing I wanted to point out was that whenever a troubled fiance writes in and mentions that she met her fiance and got engaged within a few months, everyone seems to tell her ‘yes, that is probably too soon.’ So I understand why this LW may be concerned about her sister jumping into things. However, concern is not at all what she’s showing by her ridiculously childish behavior.

avatar sarolabelle March 6, 2012, 9:37 am

If I had to read the word “disrespectful” again I was going to scream!

JK JK March 6, 2012, 9:40 am

That´s a bit disrespectful, don´t you think? :D

avatar vizslalvr March 6, 2012, 9:41 am

Regardless of whether or not you like this guy, your sister is MARRYING him. She is, hopefully, going to be spending the rest of her life with him. You need to learn how to get along with him, and it’s probably going to take some effort on your part. In life, we all have to spend time with or get along with people who may not be our favorite person ever. Suck it up, put on a smile, and make the time you spend with your sister and her fiance as pleasant as possible for all of you. If you continue to act like a brat around your sister’s future husband, you are going to damage your relationship with her severely and perhaps irrevocably.

And as for the dog thing – take it as a compliment. I, too, have a somewhat unique dog breed. My mom is currently shopping for a vizsla and I have several friends who have them on their short list for breeds because my dog (and by proxy, my taste) is just that fricking awesome.

avatar lets_be_honest March 6, 2012, 12:23 pm

I hate to tell you this, but I got a vizsla like 3 weeks before you. Wanna-be.

avatar vizslalvr March 6, 2012, 1:11 pm

I no longer have any self-worth.

Budj Budj March 6, 2012, 9:43 am

face ————-> palm

You are failing to see you have made this about you…this isn’t about your sister at all. That is what I would consider selfish and disrespectful. When you get a little older you may gain a perspective that when you hate someone..EVERYTHING they do is offensive…let it go…get to know him and apologize to your sister. If he treats your sister right and she is happy that is all that matters and maybe you would see your sister more if you would pull the oar out of your ass and try to be supportive of her decisions.

Oh and MOST people that give a shit about other people in their life would be happy / complimented to hear their choice of dog breed swayed someone else’s choice of dog breed (that is just to say you are thinking very pettily about this whole thing)…and for the record I don’t know any men that want to get a french bull dog.

avatar oppositeofzen March 6, 2012, 9:49 am

Not sure how I missed your comment, but I thought the same thing about the French bulldog.

avatar MsBorgia March 6, 2012, 9:57 am

Really? We’re all talking about French bulldogs? How ORIGINAL.

dabbler dabbler March 6, 2012, 9:59 am

Haha, I had the same thought about the guys and French bulldog thing.

What jumped out at me the most was that comment, plus the obsession with everything being “original” and “unique.” I’m betting she’s a hipster. :)

Budj Budj March 6, 2012, 10:06 am

All this talk of middle schoolers wanting their “likes” to be unique and original has made me make a hilarious comparison to the “I created the band wagon and jumped off it when everyone else got on” mentality that a lot of hipsters have…

dabbler dabbler March 6, 2012, 10:12 am

Exactly! My dog breed is more obscure than your dog breed… Or like that t-shirt that says “I listen to bands that don’t exist yet.”

dabbler dabbler March 6, 2012, 10:23 am

Or she could just go this route:


avatar bethany March 6, 2012, 11:05 am

That was awesome.

TaraMonster TaraMonster March 6, 2012, 11:40 am

Actually Napoleon Dynamite totally owns the rights to pet llamas.

Pet llamas are soooo 2004.

avatar Morgan March 6, 2012, 12:07 pm

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

(wait for it)

You wouldn’t know. It’s a really obscure number.

avatar bethany March 6, 2012, 4:50 pm


avatar Addie Pray March 6, 2012, 5:00 pm

I love this! I really hate hipsters. What I hate most about them is how they all deny being hipsters.

avatar oppositeofzen March 6, 2012, 3:36 pm

Q:Why did the hipster burn his mouth at dinner?

A:Because he didn’t want want his pizza to get cool before he ate it.


avatar Kalipso March 6, 2012, 6:38 pm

French bulldogs are OVER.

avatar Sue March 6, 2012, 10:14 am

I bet she’s getting English and French bulldogs mixed up. I definitely don’t know many men that want yappy small dogs around.

avatar lets_be_honest March 6, 2012, 12:25 pm

Not just a stick, but an oar, eh?

Disclaimer: I am not Canadian even though I use the term eh.
p.s. I miss TheOtherMe

Leroy Leroy March 6, 2012, 12:44 pm

What do you want to bet that Mr. pathetic and unoriginal is onto the LW and just doing these things to get on her nerves?

He probably doesn’t intend to get whatever dog she’d mentioned, he’s just playing with her.

avatar Fabelle March 6, 2012, 12:50 pm

Agree! Especially since she warned him beforehand that she’d only tell him if he “promised to not want it”

caitie_didnt caitie_didnt March 6, 2012, 9:45 am

Can’t f*cking WAIT for the update on this one!

I really have nothing constructive to add, Wendy’s advice is amazing.

avatar MsBorgia March 6, 2012, 10:00 am

She’ll probably write back with a whole bunch of details she “forgot” to include in the original letter, and they will also be about commandeering the sole rights to French bulldog ownership.

avatar Addie Pray March 6, 2012, 10:08 am

Yea, no kidding, LW will write in to say she forgot to tell us that this guy beats her sister, was convicted of assault of an elderly lady, and likes child porn, and *that* is why she doesn’t like him. You know, important small details like that.

avatar blarfengar March 6, 2012, 10:02 am

AMEN sister. That’s going to be a treat.

avatar Vathena March 6, 2012, 12:24 pm

I thought that too. “OMG Wendy and the commenters were so mean and DISRESPECTFUL to me! There is so much more to prove what a jerk he is! I forgot to say that he also totally wears pleated pants, sooo gross. Also I hate the way he breathes while he’s chewing. So lame it makes me want to upchuck!”

avatar camille905 March 6, 2012, 3:26 pm