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No satisfaction

Here are a few things from around the web that may interest you:

“Top 12 Tips For Rekindling the Flame in a Sexless Marriage” [via PopSugar Love]

“What I Learned From Getting Divorced at 29″ [via It’s Just Brunch]

“Mom Fights Back Against Sexist Sixth-Grade Pool Party Dress Code” [via HuffPost]

Related: “School Dress Codes Don’t Protect Students — They Force Teachers To Police Girls’ Bodies” [via Bustle]

“The Breakup: Just over a year after my mom died, my boyfriend of three years walked out — carrying his deodorant and phone charger. And then, I was grieving all over again.” [via Modern Floss]

“A Generation of Unmarried Parents: Today’s young parents are committed to their kids, even if they avoid walking down the aisle.” [via Parents]

On Hollywood sexism: “Maggie Gyllenhaal: ‘At 37 I was ‘too old’ for role opposite 55-year-old man'” [via The Guardian]

“13 Signs You’ve Gotten Way Too Comfortable With Your Long-Term Partner” [via HuffPost]

Thank you to those who submitted links for me to include. If you see something around the web you think DW readers would appreciate, please send me a link to wendy@dearwendy.com and, if it’s a fit, I’ll include it in Friday’s round-up. Thanks!

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It’s time again for Shortcuts. For every question, I’ll give my advice in just a few sentences because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great that being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to go.

My husband and I have been together for ten years and this mutual guy friend has been around for the majority of that time. As I was showing him a picture on my phone recently, he by accident saw a revealing picture that I took for my husband. He told me I looked good because I’ve lost like 60 lbs. Later, he told me I looked hot in the photo and he had to go sit down after seeing it. He also said that, since I have his number, I could send him the photo (not happening). Do you think he thinks about that photo? Or thinks about my body? — Revealing Photo Fail

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FullSizeRender-11Wendy’s Weekly Picks,” is a feature in which I’ll highlight stuff I like or recommend in the worlds of fashion, gift ideas, home decor, makeup, websites, entertainment, and recipes. Of course, many of the stuff I link to will be affiliate products, which means I’ll receive a commission on any click-throughs or purchases you make through the affiliate links. As always, I appreciate your support! Here are my favorite finds this week:

This Monday is Memorial Day here in the states, which is the unofficial start of the summer (yay!!). Just in time, I think I’ve finished my shoe-shopping for the season. After trying on lots of pairs, I finally settled on one pair of flats (which I LOVE), a pair of super cute and comfy black wedges (I bought them cheap at DSW, and I found them online for almost 50% off), and two pairs of flat sandals (including what I consider the perfect summer shoe and will probably wear five days out of seven for the next four months and hopefully every summer for the next few years; they are SO comfortable and basically go with anything).

I also finally settled on a hat to shade my fair skin from the sun. I got this one but with a black brim, which I can’t find online, and I bought it at Nordstrom Rack, which has similar styles online like this and this, for less than 15 bucks (which is much cheaper than some of the styles I was eying here and here). I like that it’s stylish, lightweight (so, hopefully, won’t feel too hot on the scorcher days) and has a wide enough brim to shield most of my face without being so wide it looks more at place at the beach (which, sadly, I probably won’t be getting to too much this summer what with a baby coming right smack in the middle of it). If you ARE looking for a hat to wear to the beach, I also tried on and loved this one from the same company at a very reasonable price. I like that all these hats have little drawstrings inside to adjust the size, making for a comfortable fit.

In honor of summer, I’ve also broken out my favorite summer bag, which I’ve had for three years and it’s still good as new (especially after a round in the washing machine; I have the sand stripe version). It’s currently 40% off. For summer, I also love (but don’t own) this, this, and this. And this one is just always good, no matter the season. Duh.

Keeping with the summer theme, I recently discovered this sunscreen, which looks like deodorant and can cause a few side-eyes when applied in public, but is a godsend if you have young kids who won’t hold still for sunscreen lotion or spray. From the first application, Jackson has tolerated this sunscreen like a champ and I often use it myself when we’re out and about since I like seeing people’s reaction to a grown women smearing deodorant on her face.

Happy summer and happy shopping!

I’m having an affair that my husband knows about; the problem is my boyfriend doesn’t know about my husband because we live a few cities away, and it’s getting complicated. It all started three years ago. My husband and I had money issues, kid issues, boredom issues. I felt crushed by the stress of a youngest child who had disorders, was labeled special needs, and needed my care on a constant basis.

One night I was invited to a party where I met Jim. Jim was smooth and nice and caring and so care-free — the exact opposite of my own life. We fell in love, and he has no idea that, after seeing him on the weekends, I go back home to my husband and kids. He thinks I’m separated and that my husband is long gone and living on his own. He doesn’t know about the family dinners we have and the vacations we take.

I am so tangled in this other life it’s sickening. I’ve met Jim’s family and friends and they all love me and think I am perfect for Jim. Jim was so afraid of women all his life until he met me. He often tells me how women wronged him in the past and how he loves how honest and caring I am. I am a huge fraud. When I’m out with my husband, I am constantly looking over my shoulder wondering if Jim’s family or friends will see me, and, when I’m with Jim, I’m terrified my friends or my family will see me. I’ve become so depressed that I cry on a daily basis not believing my lies have lasted almost three years!

My husband knows what I’m doing and is so-so with it, but he asks me to stop and I don’t know if I can. I’ve tried breaking it off before, and I got so upset I threw up and called Jim immediately asking for him back.

Jim wants me to bring my kids and move in with him, and I stupidly told him I will in the summer, Knowing full well there is no way I can leave my husband. I am in love with both these men and I don’t know what to do. My husband and I get along so well that I don’t even know why I did this. I’m happy with him, but it scares me to think of living without Jim. And it breaks my heart thinking of hurting either man. I am the most selfish person I know. Please help me. — Tired of the Lies

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This week in the forums we’re discussing:

I’m the other woman

My boyfriend is scared of marriage…

New Puppy!

Can’t have everything we want

My boyfriend has broken up with me. Was what happened that big of a deal?

Pregnancy and labor talk

I moved overseas for my job, now my boyfriend is distant

What do you do when you’re feeling discouraged?

Need book recommendations!!

Wedding Thank You Notes

Game of Thrones Discussion S5E6 (Spoilers)


Chicago – May 21 (AP baby book shower & meet JK!)

South Florida — Saturday, May 23

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If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at wendy@dearwendy.com.