Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Reading List: What Happens When One Finally Meets His Internet Girlfriend in Person?

“The truth is, Amy feels like a ghost in static now. I have kept all the evidence: old e-mails and chats, text messages, her songs. My memory of her feels contained within servers and hard drives, locked away and inaccessible. In my mind’s eye, I keep parsing through the same remnants of my time with her, the same jpegs, the same docs, the same pieces to construct a patchwork past of those four days.

WHEN I went to Georgia, we took photographs with a black-and-white disposable camera, and this is what I can remember: only the threads between these pictures. We thought we were documenting it for posterity, but there they are, haunting me with an exactness that doesn’t even scratch the surface.”

For anyone who has ever carried on a “blind” love affair through these internets — and I know that’s a lot of you — this week’s “Modern Love” may be especially relatable. It’s a great read for anyone who has experienced intense and fleeting love, loved from a distance, loved the idea of someone more than the actual person, or simply loved someone he or she couldn’t be with. [via New York Times]

9 comments… add one
  • avatar

    SpaceySteph August 12, 2011, 11:32 am

    That was a great story. Thanks for posting it Wendy, I never would have found it on my own.

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    Natasia Rose August 12, 2011, 11:39 am

    Loved it, especially the last two paragraphs. Thanks for sharing!

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  • bittergaymark

    bittergaymark August 12, 2011, 1:23 pm

    Eh, I thought it was poorly written. There was no REAL why. Why did it not work out? What happened in Georgia? I dunno, it started strong, then…peetered out. It needed another page or so to flesh out the details. It got very vague… Hey, it’s no surprise that it didn’t work out. But some details of the moments of the revelation would be nice… The piece is all set up with no real pay off…

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    • avatar

      Nick August 12, 2011, 4:22 pm

      I see what you’re saying. I thought it was loose enough to fill in some of the blanks. When he says that after they met in person they simply could not go back to the screens and neither one was able or willing to move, that was pretty much the end of things. Maybe it was a strong enough connection that an LDR was off the table but that circumstances made it unwise for either to move. That’s how I took it. In a way, if either were to move, it would change the mover and therefor undermine the basis for their connection. I thought it was sweet, but maybe I’m too sensitive, or else I’m getting soft.

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    • avatar

      Eagle Eye August 14, 2011, 12:35 am

      Hmm, yeah, I mean I generally enjoyed it while reading it…although on further reflection…idk, it got a little holier than thou…my love was fleeting but oh so perfect in ways that you can’t quite understand…being mere mortals and all…

      But I do think that it is a worthwhile to reflect and analyze love in our digital age…as someone who experienced a cross-continent LDR for a couple of months (we met in person and dated first, lived in Asia for a couple of months and then came back so not exactly the same thing) there is this odd connection between people that’s forged over skype, gchat, emails and very expensive phone calls…at least that part rang true to me in some capacity

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  • avatar

    SGMcG August 12, 2011, 12:24 pm

    At least the girl he met was real. I’m currently catching up on radiolab episodes and was a bit horrified to hear about a computer expert corresponding and having an idea of a romance with what ended up being a chatbot. The fact that such bots may potentially be on dating websites is frightening!

    Here’s the streaming episode segment in question:

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  • avatar

    callmehobo August 12, 2011, 4:21 pm

    I also felt like it was poorly written. It felt like the author was trying WAY too hard to seem wistful and whimsical. I got a very hipster vibe.

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    • bittergaymark

      bittergaymark August 12, 2011, 6:29 pm

      If that’s what getting published by The New York Times, then I ought to get more proactive about sending them stuff. Seriously. It was just very, um, college newspaper to me, at best.

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  • avatar

    Rachelgrace53 August 13, 2011, 6:46 pm

    I loved this. Thanks for posting.

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