It’s time again for Shortcuts. For every question I’ll give my advice in just a few sentences because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great that being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to go.
I have asked my boyfriend to put my pictures on his Facebook page, but he keeps telling me that I’m nagging him and controlling him and that he doesn’t think we have a future together, so should I MOA or what? — LW 1
My girlfriend and I have been together a year and four months. A while ago, I was stupid and cheated on her with her friend. Thank god she forgave me. But we both made a deal to not talk to the friend ever again. Also, a while ago we broke up and she didn’t wanna talk to me, so, to push me away, she told me she was in love with this other guy. We got back together later, and he told me she didn’t really love him but she was just saying that to keep me away. She’s best friends with him and once she lied to me to go meet him. I know nothing happened, but he’s always texting her and I know he likes her. I told her that, since she was uncomfortable with me talking to the girl I cheated on her with, she shouldn’t talk to this guy since I’m uncomfortable with it. What do you think? — Uncomfortable with her friend
I think that, because you have one cheating mistake, an unrelated breakup, and distrust on both sides to the point of saying whom you can and cannot talk to, it’s time to cut your losses and MOA.
My boyfriend and I have been together since June 5th. Back some time around the beginning of December we had a some people over. One of them was a tattoo artist so he had three women come over with him. Anyway, my boyfriend came onto one of them while I was standing in our kitchen watching. He had no idea that I was even standing there. It still bothers me to this day, but any time I bring up the subject he just says that he didn’t do it and doesn’t want to talk about it. He was intoxicated, but that still doesn’t make it right. I don’t know what to do about this. I can’t even get him to answer why he would flirt with another woman if he’s as happy as he says he is, not to mention why he would do it in front of me…especially in our apartment. — No More Flirting in My Kitchen
Do tattoo artists always have entourages of women they travel with? You said it like it was a matter of fact: “He’s a tattoo artist, so yeah, naturally, he had three women with him.” Also, you met in June and were already living together six months later? You move fast! Also: what is it that you want your boyfriend to tell you? If you saw what you saw, it’s not like you need him to confirm it for you, right? You know what you saw! If you’re looking for a reason as to why your boyfriend would flirt with another woman, here you go: because he was attracted to her and felt like it and wasn’t thinking about you. Now, if you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.
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If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at [email protected].