Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Advice on ex

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This topic contains 22 replies, has 6 voices, and was last updated by avatar Chocolatebuttons 3 months ago.

Viewing 11 posts - 13 through 23 (of 23 total)
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  • #682235 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    And of course you were supposed to block him on email too. Plus, above you said he texted you.

    #682238 Reply
    Skyblossom
    Skyblossom
    Participant

    Like Kate said, it’s both. He and his mum are a package deal. He’d love to get back together with you but on his terms where he lives with his mum and she always comes first and you are available for sex and a little companionship if his mum allows it in the moment. If you got back together with him everything would be like it was before which didn’t make you happy then. It won’t make you happy now. Any time you try to get serious he’ll break up again. He’s probably lonely. It is hard to find a girlfriend who will put up with a man who is so attached to his mum and so controlled by her. The older he gets the harder he will find it to have a girlfriend. When a guy is 22 most guys his age still live with a parent so it doesn’t stand out but by his age most are independent and it stands out that he hasn’t managed to leave home. Dating him is like dating a teenager with a controlling mum. He’s stuck in his teen lifestyle. Don’t you want someone your own age who can act his age and who is able to make his own decisions?

    #682240 Reply
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    Mrsconfused

    This maybe way off topic… However I want to work things out with my husband. However he has moved out and has been dating someone since a month after he moved out. Said he was going to work on him I needed to work on me and then we would work on the marriage. I would see her at his house and scream and yell profanity at her she knew he was married and I sent her all the text a about him telling No,he wanted to work things out. In February he told me that he is going to wait and see how he feels on may 18th. That we are toxic to each other because of things he did and ways I reacted. He said that he texted women from day one and would scream at us all the time because he was angry just looking at my daughter or myself. I knew about the sexting because I would be insecure and,do through his phone sometimes and see it. I started taking screen shots of it and then started hiding my phone. Instead of praying,about the situation if talk about it breaking marital vows of privacy. Then came when he moved out and id spy on him to see if he was doing the right things. I told his mother what he was doing and that he bought the other lady a ring that she wears on her left hand. His mother got so mad that she now won’t talk to me. He says my family hates him and they don’t like how he treated my child and I. He wants to remain friends but want to work things out. We fought a lot because I would try and talk about something and he wouldn’t he would,walk away. So I stopped trying to talk things over.. And that lead me to here where I feel like I was acting and still am acting like a child because. I seen my husband and that lady at a concert and when she kissed him my blood boiled and I said hi husband hi fiance/cheater loudly and it embarrassed him. I am not,proud of those moments and I want to change good sites or books would be greatly appreciated. In a way I feel justified for acting like that because he is my husband,but I also just feel like I destroyed any chance of ever working things out with him.

    #682241 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    @mrsconfused, Can you start a new thread, please? In the advice forum? Just copy paste what you wrote here.

    • This reply was modified 3 months ago by avatar Kate.
    #682248 Reply

    Thanks skyblossom that was really helpful answer. That was the kind of answer i needed to hear…. your right he is like a teenager living at home still… i guess its so hard as i fell hard for him… he took me to lovely places very romantic great in bed . Great laughs together so i guess thats where its hard… but yes im 34 and i have my own place so your right i just need to find a guy more on my level and not one who actually likes to stay at home.

    #682257 Reply

    I did block him kate but didnt on email. I didnt expect him to email. I ment email but was typing to fast. Anyway i think you and skyblossom are right. Its both and its never going to change.

    #682279 Reply
    Skyblossom
    Skyblossom

    We are all capable of falling in love with someone who isn’t very compatible. Most of us have probably done it at least once. It hurts to break up because the emotions are real but it hurts worse to spend years or a lifetime with someone who is so incompatible. Block him and if he manages to send a message to you ignore it like you’ve never seen it and block whatever way it arrived.

    If you move this to Forum Advice you’ll get lots more comments.

    #682281 Reply

    Ok thankyou

    #682285 Reply

    Mrs confused i cabt read your reply as its private

    #682290 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    Oh, ok, so I can see Mrsconfused’s post, and it’s not to you, it’s about a problem she has which is totally unrelated to yours, so I was suggesting she start a new thread. I didn’t realize it was private.

    #682295 Reply

    Ahh ok… thanks kate

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