Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

“My Wife is addicted To Conflict”

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This topic contains 19 replies, has 10 voices, and was last updated by avatar Stillrunning 4 weeks, 1 day ago.

Viewing 8 posts - 13 through 20 (of 20 total)
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  • #726379 Reply
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    Vathena

    This marriage sounds awful. LW needs to make a plan to leave, but to be VERY careful. This wife sounds unhinged and vindictive, and definitely not above making wild accusations and using the children as pawns in all this. She is already accusing her husband of inappropriate thoughts/actions towards their six-year-old daughter. I don’t doubt that she would hesitate to lob that bomb into divorce proceedings. A custody battle with a person like this is going to be a nightmare. LW, get all your ducks in a row legally and document EVERYTHING if you want to maintain a relationship with your kids.

    This woman is an abuser. If LW was a woman, writing about a man, we’d be concerned that he’d escalate to physical violence, not advising her to think about how well the household chores are divided and why he might be so angry.

    #726389 Reply
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    Juliecatharine

    Lawyer lawyer lawyer. Go for custody. Find out what the recording laws are in your state and if it’s legal record her abuse. Document everything. Get copies of any and all financial records. Document your status as the primary caregiver. You cannot allow this to continue.

    #726390 Reply
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    Northern Star

    I think it’s pretty sad that the first comment tries to find the “reason” for the wife’s disgusting abuse; it must the husband not taking out the garbage or cleaning up the kids’ breakfast, right?

    LW, you need to divorce this woman before she escalates to smacking you around in addition to making sure you feel completely worthless. Nobody deserves to live this way. Your kids are watching their dad be verbally beaten down every day. That’s not good for them. You don’t want them thinking their mom’s behavior is normal—or growing up to treat their own spouses this way. Right?

    #726392 Reply
    bittergaymark
    Bittergaymark

    Contact a Lawyer.
    .
    Text her this link — immediately.
    .
    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5FjWe31S_0g

    #726447 Reply
    FireStar
    FireStar
    Participant

    Lawyer. And a therapist for you. You don’t deserve this.

    #727012 Reply
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    Ashley

    I didn’t read all of your letter. I made it about a paragraph in, and that was enough to make me think you need to leave. Lawyer up, and get your half of that 2 million. Get your ducks in a row first, then leave. It may be difficult for you to leave if your wife is truly that abusive. As a man, you may not think of yourself that way but if the gender roles were reversed, I’d be worried.

    #727019 Reply
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    va-in-ny
    Participant

    Yes. Get yourself to a lawyer. You’ve been carrying the family finances while she’s been saving, but it sounds to me that you’ve kept those two accounts separate. Why? Her extensive zeros in her bank account might be causing some of her deeply seeded dark side to come out. I bet if you even the financial playing field, you might see a different side.

    Combine the account – see what happens. (And, visit a lawyer)

    #727086 Reply
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    Stillrunning

    What a terrible marriage. Her accusation that you’re having sexual thoughts about your 6-yr-old daughter is a harbinger of what she’ll do if you try to divorce her. Which you should do.
    Go to a lawyer and find out what you need to do to document the abuse. Be informed; don’t play nice.

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