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Dear Wendy

Poorly timed promotion

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This topic contains 32 replies, has 5 voices, and was last updated by avatar dinoceros 3 days, 11 hours ago.

Viewing 12 posts - 13 through 24 (of 33 total)
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  • #682833 Reply
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    Janelle

    Ok so you feel like a jerk? And? You need to do whats best for you, it is not your obligation to put this job before your future. Management is the jerk most likely due to what sounds like some poor management considering the hih turn over rate.

    #682837 Reply
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    RedRoverRedRover

    I’be never heard of signing a lease on your job like that where you have a penalty if you quit. Are they still allowed to fire you? What do they give you in exchange for signing it?

    As for the job, agree with everyone else, take it. I was offered a job just as I started trying to get pregnant. It was a job I really wanted, but I knew mat leave would be a year, so I could take the job, work for 9 months, then leave for a year. I talked to my husband about it and he’s like, you have to live your life. You can’t sit here in a holding pattern because of something that *might* happen in the future. Make the choice based on the current circumstances and then plan around that as necessary. I also asked my manager at the time and she agreed with my husband. Take it, take 3-6 months to focus and get comfortable in it, and then make your new plans from there.

    #682838 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    She means a lease on an apartment I think.

    #682839 Reply
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    ele4phant

    It’s her apartment lease I think, and that she was just thinking about lining up the timing to move (both geographically and career-wise) once that lease ends.

    #682840 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    Dinoceros, you might want to pick up the latest edition of “What Color is Your Parachute?” There’s a self-inventory section that helps you get to the real heart of what you want in your next position, as well as the nitty gritty of how much money you need to make, and where to focus geographically.

    I think the first your boss should hear about you looking elsewhere is when you have an offer that’s good enough to make you walk.

    #682844 Reply
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    RedRoverRedRover

    Ah, ok, that makes a lot more sense. 🙂

    #682852 Reply
    Dear Wendy
    Dear Wendy
    Keymaster

    Take the job if you want it. Never tell your bosses if and when you look for a new job. Feel no guilt if and when you quit, even if it’s in three months. None of this is personal — it’s business, and believe me, if if, for some reason, your position needed to be eliminated or they decided to fire or lay you off, they’re not going to hem and haw about looking like jerks.

    #682853 Reply
    Dear Wendy
    Dear Wendy
    Keymaster

    Not super related, but illustrates my point about employers being jerks and not caring: back when I was working at a women’s website where DW was popularized, I was given a pink slip two weeks before Christmas and told that unless the site sold by New Year’s Eve, it was going to fold and I’d be out of a job. Well, I took that opportunity to start working on the launch of my own site — this very site, DW. The aforementioned women’s site was sold at the 11th hour and the staff was told that if we all agreed to work for free for the next few weeks during the transition, some of us would be “lucky” enough to keep our jobs (though same pay wasn’t guaranteed). I said no thanks and decided to stick with my plan of launching my own site, a fact I didn’t necessarily broadcast but didn’t keep secret enough, apparently, because the big boss found out and threatened to sue me. I hired a lawyer and threatened to counter-sue. Long story short, they knew they didn’t have a case and they worked with me in a way that benefited both of our needs.

    Moral: In business, always, always look after yourself because no matter how hard you work or how nice you are or how much of a benefit you are to the “team” or whatever, someone will always be ready to cut you down if its in their best interest to do so.

    • This reply was modified 3 days, 15 hours ago by Dear Wendy Dear Wendy.
    #682855 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    Yeah, my mentor told me years ago that her dad told HER, companies always look out for their own best interests so you have to look out for yours. I see younger people not getting that and being idealistic about the relationship they want to have with a company.

    #682856 Reply
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    dinoceros
    Member

    Yeah, I meant apartment lease. Basically if I don’t move vaguely around the end of spring during any given year, I either have to sign a short-term and expensive lease or pay out thousands to break it. That’s part of why I think I’ve been thinking so rigidly about my plans because I really, really don’t want to shell out that much money.

    I did have a friend who told her boss about a job offer prior to signing the paperwork, and then when layoffs came, he let her go. Then her job fell through. So I do understand the importance of not being open about it. But I guess seeing so many people that I know give a heads up made me feel a little lax about it, foolishly. Hearing the stories helps though.

    As for not telling people back home I’m not coming back, I haven’t said that because I still might. The reason I initially told them I would was because there was a lot of stressful family/friend events going on, and at the time, I felt really helpless being so far away and felt like I should move back. Now that everything has settled down, it’s less urgent. I know that if my parents’ health declines, I may want to move back, or if I just get sick of paying so much in plane tickets, but I probably shouldn’t have overpromised until I knew that I was actually moving back. (Guess I should treat them like my bosses! 😉 )

    You all are making me feel a lot better about my decision because after seeing all the advice you all give everyone, I trust your opinions a lot. And so many varied experiences, too!

    #682857 Reply
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    RedRoverRedRover

    Right, and don’t confuse “the company” with your manager or coworkers. For example, your manager might love you and want what’s best for you, but your manager works for the company. Your manager has a boss, who has a boss, who has a boss, etc. If you have a good relationship they will look out for you as far as they are able, but at some point they will no longer be able. So while you can have a great relationship and trust your manager, you need to understand their limitations in terms of being able to help you, and that’s why you always need to be looking out for yourself.

    #682858 Reply
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    Ron

    “The staff was told that if we all agreed to work for free for the next few weeks during the transition, some of us would be “lucky” enough to keep our jobs (though same pay wasn’t guaranteed).”

    Wow! How could any right-thinking person turn down an offer like that. Translation: “We don’t really know quite how this site operates and need to be taught, but we can’t afford to lose eyeballs while that’s happening. If you really impress us and if your pay is a lot less than you’re worth, then we’ll keep you on, likely at a pay cut.”

    It’s sort of like all the free-lancers who wrote for free for Huffington Post to gain more experience, get exposure, and hopefully land a paying job there. HP was sold, Arianna made a mint, the free-lancers got nothing and felt that they had built up the site for free. Moral, watch out for your own ass, because your employer surely will not.

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