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Dear Wendy

Should I transfer schools??

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This topic contains 4 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by avatar brise 1 month, 1 week ago.

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  • #728922 Reply

    Need some major advice.

    I’ve been going to the same school ever since I was 4 years old. I’m a freshman in high school now. And I’m not sure if I’m happy here. I’m not particularly unhappy (though I have been in the past), but I’m also not quite happy here. It’s a really great school with amazing teachers and academics, and I know my parents pay a lot for me to go here. It provides lots of great opportunities for my future. But I’ve been realizing lately that I only have one or two close friends. A lot of acquaintances and friends, but not a lot that I’m super close to. It makes me feel lonely sometimes. Though this may sound foolish or silly, there’s also no cute/sweet boys in my grade that I could ever see myself interested in. My grade is around 100 people, so I know all of them pretty well. Sometimes I just think about my high school experience and I just know it’s going to be with the same people, same hallways, same everything like it’s been for the past 10 years.

    There’s an all girls Catholic high school close by to my house. One of my close friends left my school last year and is now there, and she’s so much happier. I’m not even sure what sparked my interest about this school. I’m not Catholic, and I hardly know anyone there. But from what my friend has told me and from scouring through their website, it looks really great. There’s not a lot of drama between the girls, and you actually meet a lot of guys from the brother school. The thought of starting over with a whole new set of people and social life thrills me. It also completely terrifies me. What if I went there and decided that I hated it? I couldn’t go back to my old school. I don’t even know if I want to transfer.

    I haven’t told anyone else that I feel this way because I’m still so conflicted. The decision on whether or not to change schools could affect my whole life. I’m not unhappy at my current school. I’m just almost content. Almost satisfied. But is it really too much to ask for a good, lively, fun high school experience instead of one full of almost contentment?

    I know this is such a long post but I just really needed to get this off my chest. It’s been eating at me lately and I just don’t know what to do.

    #728935 Reply

    Two close friends isn’t all that unusual and you have other more casual friends. You know there won’t be any cute boys at an all girls H.S.

    #728944 Reply

    I think you need to determine if it’s even possible first. When I was in HS, my parents wouldn’t have let me change schools. I assume you don’t know if there’s space (probably has a waiting list), how the cost compares, what sort of religious education you’d have to go through or potentially if you would be admitted. Might want to determine this beforehand because if it’s not possible, nothing else matters.

    I get that you feel like you should have more friends, but picking up and moving to a school where potentially everyone already knows each other may not result in more friends. It could be better, but like you said, it COULD be worse. I’ll be honest with you, though, most adults do not look back on HS as the best time of their lives. My high school experience really has no relevance to how my life turned out. IMO, uprooting yourself and doing all the work to transfer is not worth the little importance that HS tend to serve in a person’s life (since you are at a good school already and are not completely miserable).

    #728955 Reply

    Hey Malia,

    I read your story and I just wanted to tell you that I think that it’s great you really want to enjoy your high school experience and are thinking about trying something new. That’s four years of your life you’re going to be spending into your education and it is important. And, at least for me, the biggest thing I’ve learned since becoming an adult is it doesn’t matter how many times you fall on your face. It only matters how many times you get back up. I encourage you to take risks and boldly do what scares you. Reaglardless of your decision though I’m sure you’ll do well no matter which school you go to.

    #728970 Reply

    You can start with information. Make an appointment and see what they have to say. So you won’t be up in the air, you will have more concrete elements to make a decision.

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