Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Unstable coworker

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This topic contains 17 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by avatar Kate 6 days, 7 hours ago.

Viewing 6 posts - 13 through 18 (of 18 total)
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  • #739070 Reply
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    LisforLeslie

    Sorry I was making a subtle joke:

    Throw someone under THE bus -make them a scapegoat. They get the blame for whatever mistakes happen (where the bus is really “The Proverbial Bus)

    Throw someone under A bus – push someone in front of a moving bus, likely to hurt or kill them (Where A bus is really… a bus).

    #739437 Reply
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    BlackBear

    I just have to say how grateful I am to you all. You gave me a lot of hope and things to watch for during a really painful time. Kate, you especially, but everyone. She quit yesterday!!! It’s been really tense since I first posted but I essentially limited my interactions with her and made sure that I was never alone with her. Her manager, me, and she met yesterday to evaluate her progress so far on her PIP. She reacted very defensively and ended up quitting. I took a back seat during the conversation and her manager was very professional. When we told HR she had quit, they said, “this is the best case scenario.” I think they also wanted her fired but were afraid of a wrongful termination lawsuit because of her “stress” medical absence? Not sure, we are an at-will employment state… I don’t believe that I have ever encountered someone like her before —- so very manipulative and adept at twisting things—and she turns and strikes. It’s definitely been a life lesson for me. The comment someone made about me making a managerial mistake pouring so much into her——that’s right too. I shouldn’t have done that. I was convinced that she could be great if I just helped her get over this hurdle and was patient…. Life lesson #2. Anyway, it’s over, everyone from my boss to HR to my staff are glad, and I feel 5 years younger. Again, thank you all for the support. It was a really difficult time for me and it made a big difference to me.

    #739461 Reply
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    LisforLeslie

    @bb -that is great news. Take the lessons learned and put them to good use. Hopefully your paths will never cross again.

    #739477 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    Is she any kind of protected class: minority, LGBQT, over 40? Even in an at will state she could come back with a discrimination case if her PIP etc wasn’t impeccably handled. Companies fear this. They get sued all the time.

    #739559 Reply
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    Blackbear

    Yes, in her ‘50s.

    #739560 Reply
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    Kate

    Yeah, so she COULD lawyer up or go through your state’s council for discrimination and come at them with age discrimination.

    I moved into a new role 2 years ago and inherited a direct report who was relatively new and not working out. She wasn’t a good fit, but someone (who left right after) had recruited her heavily and hired her. So I got the shit job of putting her on a PIP and managing it. I was on high alert the whole time, scared she was going to turn on me and say I was a bad manager, hadn’t given her adequate feedback, etc. Someone told me HR was scared because they’d been sued a bunch of times, and this woman was a minority. Fortunately she handled it gracefully and didn’t throw me under the bus. Then a year later I got laid off and came at them for age discrimination and got a bunch more severance because they did in fact fuck up and leave themselves open to that.

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