Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Why did he cheat on his new girlfriend with me?

Home Forums Get Advice, Give Advice Why did he cheat on his new girlfriend with me?

This topic contains 26 replies, has 8 voices, and was last updated by avatar AuntyDote 1 week, 1 day ago.

Viewing 12 posts - 1 through 12 (of 27 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #725774 Reply
    avatar
    Ashley

    I met a guy and we talked for about 2 weeks. Everything went well and he asked me to be his girlfriend while drunk 4 days after our first date and I said we’ll talk about when he sobered up. We talked everyday. It was a Friday and he asked me to come over but I had plans with my girlfriends and he said he felt like I chose them over him but everything ended well. I told him I would see him after. That night he ignores my texts and calls but I see he’s active on Facebook and is blatantly ignoring me. I get pissed and he calls me the next night and says he did that because he didn’t know what I did at the party. We let it go. On Sunday he stands me up after asking me to spend the day at his house when we made up but he apologizes the next day so we continue talking. Tuesday he doesn’t call so I call him and he answers then he says hold on and leaves me there for awhile. I hang up and he never calls back. We don’t speak for 3 days so I tell him I’m done and goodbye because I think he is messing with me like the night of the party and he says that’s cool and I ask if we can be friends and he ignores me. 16 days go by. I text him (multiple) and he answers after a day. We talk and he says he’ll drive to my place which is something he has never done before even though I had previously asked him to multiple times. He offers to go inside and meet my mother and everything. We chat and make out in my driveway since I have somewhere to be in the morning. I begin to think the space did us some good. We say our byes and he doesn’t talk to me the next day or the day after. Again I think he’s playing a game and I tell him I won’t chase. He reads and doesn’t reply. 3 days later and I accidentally send a picture I was intending to send to my mother to him and he replies “who is this”. I’m thinking he’s joking but the person says to stop contacting his phone because he has a girlfriend now. I’m in shock because I just made out and fondled him less than 7 days ago. They ask for proof and I send a screenshot of him asking for my address and us saying goodnight to each other. She proceeds to call me names and curse me out. Long story short, his new girlfriend blocks my number on his phone and my Facebook. We have no way of communicating with each other. I never spoke to him. We talked about if we saw other people during the break when he was in my driveway and we both said no. He never mentioned her. It has been 5 days. Does he still want me? Why would he risk his new relationship for me? If he liked me why did he let her block me? Did he want me but he had already entered in a relationship with her? Will he reach out to me? Is he torn? What is going on?

    #725775 Reply
    avatar
    Sarah

    Are you serious? DON’T BE A DOORMAT, BLOCK HIM AND FORGET HE EXISTED. And in the future that many issues in the first 2 weeks is a train wreck waiting to happen.

    #725777 Reply
    avatar
    LisforLeslie

    He’s not torn. He may contact you again and he’ll say really nice things so that you give him a handy or a blowie. He’s a ass and a douche.

    #725778 Reply
    FireStar
    Firestar

    He ignores you. You hang up on him. He stands you up. You tell him it’s over. Then you want to be friends. You tell him you won’t chase him. And then you do. Now HE has blocked you. Unless the girlfriend has him tied up in basement somewhere and is controlling his social media against his will. And you want to know what that means. If he’s torn?

    No. Just no. He is done. You aren’t anyone to him. He was trying to have some fun on the side. The real question is why aren’t you done? What – in God’s green earth – was remotely appealing to you about any of this?

    #725780 Reply
    avatar
    Ashley

    @firestar He didn’t block me. No matter how much we argued he never cut the lines of communication. She had his phone and still does as far as yesterday ( I called from a different number and she answered). I was just confused because he drove across town and wanted to meet my mother. It seemed like we were moving forward. That’s all.

    #725781 Reply
    avatar
    Ashley

    I’m 19 and he was my first kiss and the first guy I did anything sexual with although we didnt have sex

    #725782 Reply
    avatar
    LeslieJoan

    You weren’t moving forward. Mostly there was nothing between you but a lot of space, so you were just shuffling sideways. And if you think anyone who ignored you so much is a good candidate for a serious boyfriend, then you probably need to think again. He’s a douche. Oh, and don’t take a guy seriously if he asks you to be his girlfriend when he’s drunk.

    #725783 Reply
    kmtthat
    kmtthat
    Participant

    You deserve better. I don’t know you, and you do. there are so many other men out there and anytime it’s THAT dramatic right off the bat – run. If she has his phone and he really didn’t want her to have it, he’d report it stolen and call the police. He is letting her have it. Because he wants to make amends with her. Even if he does eventually text — and he probably will when surveillance ends — he was still a jerk and a cheater. Why do you want that? Those guys don’t change overnight, or because of the “love of a good woman.” I think you are hoping it’s some crazy misunderstanding or that he actually wants you because you have an amazing connection — but he was an inconsistent douche even before that.

    Find someone who is the type of person you want already, aim higher. And no offense, if you are living with your mother I assume you are fairly young? There’s NO RUSH to meet someone / get partnered up.

    #725784 Reply
    kmtthat
    kmtthat
    Participant

    Ah, you are 19 and I get that you feel very connected to him as he was your first kiss. I promise there will be a second person you kiss, or maybe even a 5th person, and one of those people will value you and treat you and other women with respect.

    #725785 Reply
    avatar
    Ashley

    @kmtthat I’m 19

    #725789 Reply
    FireStar
    Firestar

    You think he doesn’t know you’re blocked? Of course he does. Whether he did it or he let her do it – he knows and is okay with it. Don’t put this on some other girl. This is him.

    I get why you are hung up on him. But he wasn’t legit. Maybe he always had the girlfriend. Maybe she was out of town. Maybe they had a fight. It doesn’t actually matter. I promise he will resurface at some point looking for you to boost his ego. Now is the time for you to block him. Sarah is right. Block him everywhere like he never existed. If a guy doesn’t treat you the way you treat him, the way a decent person would act – end it. No drama, no attempts at friendship. Just walk. You know you are better than that. The more garbage you put up with, the more garbage you’ll get.

    #725791 Reply
    avatar
    Pillowbear97

    He sounds like a narcissistic asshole

Viewing 12 posts - 1 through 12 (of 27 total)
Reply To: Why did he cheat on his new girlfriend with me?
Your information:




Comments on this entry are closed.