It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing now. Today we hear from “Conflicted About Moving Away From My Son” who was conflicted about whether he should move away from his 15-year-old son, whom he shared joint custody of with his ex-wife (whom he said was “dead-set against his moving”), to move with his girlfriend of five years who got a job transfer to another state. Keeping reading to see what he decided.
We have decided that moving in together is the best thing to do for our relationship. I am in the process of working out a visitation schedule for my son with my ex and feel confident of the direction it is going. My son has been very understanding and is dealing with this change in a very mature manner. I have a great support system in my family that is there for my son, my girlfriend, and, of course, me. I want thank you and all of your readers for your input and opinions on how to handle this huge change in our lives. Ultimately, I had to make a choice that I felt was right for everyone involved, and I did so with the help of my son and girlfriend knowing that this would be the best thing for our future.
Thank you again, conflicted no more.
Thank you for your update. I’m sure a decision like this isn’t easy to make and, while I can certainly appreciate doing what is best for your future, I can’t help but wonder how it is, as you say, “right for everyone involved.” I’m not saying it isn’t — obviously, I don’t know the details of your lives — but I’d be so curious to hear how this decision benefits your son.
If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.