It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Dating a Conspiracy Theorist,” who was, as her name suggests, dating a conspiracy theorist. “I would love to hear from you or the readers if anyone has had any experience dating a conspiracy theorist, and whether or not this obsession is only a phase or if will become a lifelong thing,” she wrote. After the jump, find out if she decided to stay with her boyfriend and how she’s doing today.
I really appreciate it hearing all of your experiences. It seemed that there were two main types of theorists described: first, the paranoid/possibly dangerous type, and second, the type that could live a normal life with a unique perspective of our world. Reading all the advice gave me a lot to think about, and I decided to have a serious discussion with him about his beliefs.
The initial advice did surprise me, but it made me aware of the possibility of a mental illness. I did not feel that he was at that level though, so I decided to straight up ask him, “So do you think your beliefs are ever going to drive you to go live on a mountain in the middle of nowhere?” He was surprised that I asked him that question, and I think he realized that I was genuinely worried about him. That seemed to bring him back to reality. Since that discussion, we have rarely had conversations about these theories. I think when he first discovered these alternative ideas, he became very caught up in it, but he has since definitely scaled back to a normal level. Although he still has strong beliefs in these subjects, I respect that he is willing to look outside the box and that he cares about world issues. I am also very grateful that he doesn’t allow his beliefs to interfere with everyday life anymore. Again, thank you DW and readers for your valuable advice!
Thank you for the update! I’m glad to hear things have normalized a bit more and your boyfriend’s “obsession” seems a little more under control.
If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.