It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing now. Today we hear from “Feeling Guilty For Walking Away,” who was feeling guilty about walking away from her friend in an abusive marriage. “After twelve years of being by her side, I had to walk away from the friendship because the day-to-day phone calls, text messages, and e-mails about the things her husband has said or done, or the re-tellings of how her children have become injured because she’s not properly supervised them, or her parents keeping me updated about their daughter’s living conditions have left me drained in the wake of her news.” Keep reading for an update prompted by advice from all of you.
CPS is currently investigating. Leigh’s mother called me and screamed at me for the better part of twenty minutes about how she could not believe how I involved the authorities in “an extremely private, personal, family matter” and that she and her husband were making sure their grandchildren never had to be exposed to CPS visits. Since I am the only non-family member aware of the circumstances going on in Leigh’s home, her mother felt the only other person to call to report was me. Oh well.
Her phone call at least made me feel like I had done the right thing in reporting the abuse that Leigh suffers and how her children are also affected by it. Leigh’s parents, I know, must be embarrassed and beside themselves about the investigation. Maybe the phone call to CPS made them feel like I was pouring salt in the wounds after the clean break from their daughter. If it helps Leigh see that she needs to get herself help, then being berated by her mother will have been worth it.
I sincerely hope that, once CPS had completed their investigation, the children are safe and happy and Leigh gets the help she needs.
Thank you for listening.
Oh, man. My thoughts are with those children, too. I hope they get the protection and security they deserve and need. Thanks for the update.
If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.