It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing now. Today we hear from “Her Older Man,” a 60-year-old man who had been dating a 34-year-old woman for nine years. The woman kept him a secret from her parents, whom she moved back in with in order to save money to buy her own place. She then broke up with the LW, saying she needed a younger man whom her parents would approve of and whom she could have a family with. “Since the split we’ve either texted, chatted, or emailed every day. Our breakup is killing me and I know she’s hurting. Do I just walk away or stick around knowing that, if she meets someone else, I’ll be gutted?” Keep reading to see whether he walked away or stuck around.
I moved nearer to where she lives, and she also works within a 10-minute drive of my new flat. She still maintains this secrecy of our relationship to her parents as she moved out of her rented accommodation and in with them in order to save money to purchase a house.
We are in the process of raising the money to buy a house between us this year and then moving in together. I’ve had fertility tests and, although I’m 60, there’s sufficient sperm count to produce a baby. There are many who will judge that a man of my age shouldn’t be with a woman of her years. And, yes, there are many pitfalls and disadvantages. But we’ve been together secretly for 10 years. When we move in together, there’ll be no hiding it from her parents or anyone else!
Hopefully, the coming months will provide us both with a loving home together and, despite all the criticism we’ll receive, we’ll be together!
Thanks for the update! Despite your 25-year age difference, you and your girlfriend are both adults and should feel free to be together openly and happily. I hope the coming year will allow you to do just that.
If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.