It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing now. Today, we hear from “Hoping for Happiness” who moved in with her boyfriend’s family after her mother kicked her out. She felt guilty though because, although she was grateful to his family for providing her a home, she didn’t feel completely committed to a future with him. Keep reading to see whether they’re still living under the same roof and how she’s doing today.
I’ve also decided that I’m now firmly against living with a partner until I’m married (or engaged, at the very least). I feel that my ex and I would have had a much more amicable split had we not been living together. I don’t see or speak to him now. I also feel that I should note that, before my mother kicked me out, I wasn’t allowed to leave my house, use the internet (without my crazy mother’s supervision), or watch television until I was 18. So I feel like even though I was technically an adult when I wrote in before, I had a very juvenile understanding of the world and have since learned a lot. I’ve also continued therapy to deal with the abuse in my life and issues that arose from it.
Overall, I’ve been putting a lot of focus into working, maintaining my friendships, and pursuing a hobby I picked up a few years back through which I have met a whole lot of awesome, talented people! I’m definitely a lot happier now than I was, and I appreciate everyone’s advice on DW, even those who were really harsh and assumed the worst of me. It was kind of a wake-up call as to how my actions could be perceived by outsiders. And the people who were supportive helped me come to terms with the fact that my childhood/early adult life WAS abusive and that I needed to move past it and not keep coming back. So, big thank yous to everybody!
Thank you for the update and best of luck to you in Chicago!
If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.
If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at email@example.com.