It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “I’m With Stinky,” who wrote in back February about her boyfriend whose hygiene had become especially lax in recent months. “He goes a couple days between showers, and I honestly can’t remember the last time he brushed his teeth! […] How do you break it to someone nicely that they stink?” After the jump, find out whether she was able to get the message across.
Thankfully, a few weeks after I wrote, the air started to clear. (Nice word play, huh?) We sat down and had a very calm and rational discussion about his hygiene and how it was affecting me. The majority of the conversation was him explaining how he has been in a funk (again word play) and didn’t want to take care of himself. I expressed concern about how this not only affects his health, but how it makes me less willing to be intimate with him. (Which had been a problem). He agreed to meet with my therapist to see if his symptoms were reflective of depression (something I have been battling for years) and that we would continue to work on our relationship.
I’ve had the chance to see how just talking to someone else has lifted his mood, and he is beginning to take better care of himself. While it’s still a process, and will only continue over time, our relationship is back on track, and we both look forward to growing up a little bit more.
Thanks again for everyone giving advice!
Glad to hear it! Hope things keep looking up.
If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.