Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Updates: “Never Been Kissed” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Never Been Kissed,” a 21-year-old student who had “never had a boyfriend, never been on a date, never spent more than five minutes alone with a guy, never received flowers, never [been asked out],” let alone kissed. She wrote: “Of course, it doesn’t help that two of my best friends are engaged and in love and another friend beats the guys off with a stick and always has them calling her and asking her out. I take every opportunity to go out and meet people, but no one approaches me or expresses interest. I feel like I’m a catch and would be a great girlfriend, so why can’t guys see that too?” After the jump, find out what’s happened in her life in the last 11 months and how she got from where she was to where she is now.

I took the commenters’ and your advice and just focused on myself and making myself happy. To be honest, I wasn’t even thinking about guys or a relationship; I was just living my life. I joined a sorority and met a lot of great people. I also had a summer internship and met a guy there. He admitted that he was terrified of me but used all of his courage to ask me out my last week there. I wasn’t really feeling him, but I decided to give him a shot. He completely won me over, and I am happy to report that he is now my boyfriend, which of course means I have now been kissed. Apparently, I’m pretty good at it, ha! He’s just a great person who makes me feel so comfortable in my skin and doesn’t even notice the little imperfections that seem huge to me. My confidence is through the roof and I can most definitely say that for the first time in perhaps 6 years, I am very happy with my life. I’m starting my senior year of college, got a offer for a full-time position after I graduate, and the most wonderful man in the world is in my life.

Thank you guys for all the advice!

 
Congrats! This just shows that a little patience, focusing on living your life, and giving someone an honest chance before rejecting him can all pay off!

If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at wendy@dearwendy.com with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.

16 comments… add one
  • Skyblossom

    Skyblossom August 31, 2011, 12:25 pm

    YAY!!!

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  • Lyra

    L August 31, 2011, 12:26 pm

    Awesome update. I can relate to you, LW. Congratulations on obtaining such happiness!!! 🙂

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      MonMon August 31, 2011, 12:42 pm

      haha what in the world would warrant purple thumbs on a comment like this? Do people not like others’ happiness? Yeesh.

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        TheOtherMe August 31, 2011, 1:41 pm

        I know, right ?

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        Christy August 31, 2011, 2:16 pm

        I think it’s probably the phrasing “obtaining such happiness,” as I bet the purple-thumbers are upset that “L” is saying that the guy is what’s making her happy, not all the other changes she’s made. But that’s just a guess.

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      • Lyra

        L August 31, 2011, 3:08 pm

        That’s my guess too. To clarify I was NOT just referring to just her boyfriend. It takes a hell of a lot more than a significant other to make someone truly happy, and this update tells me that she has dug deeper and found that true happiness for herself. I’ve had struggles with this in the past and can relate to her. I was just congratulating her because I know how difficult it can be.

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        MonMon August 31, 2011, 3:44 pm

        That is completely ridiculous, if it’s true. How nitpicky can people get about a simple word like that? Good God….what kind of analysis does that take to decide that “happiness obtained” must mean “man = happiness”? Did people not read that AMONG OTHER THINGS (a job offer, finishing school, joining a sorority where she met new friends, and CONFIDENCE “soaring thru the roof”) she ALSO happened to meet an incredible guy.

        Do we reaaaally have to watch how we phrase our sentences in here so much? :/

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        Dennis Hong August 31, 2011, 2:16 pm

        Have you NOT heard of schadenfreude?

        Okay, well, I hadn’t either until I saw Avenue Q…. 😉

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        summerkitten August 31, 2011, 8:27 pm

        i can only think that the purple thumbs on this come from smartphone/big thumb syndrome. she said she’s happy that things have fallen into place in her life and yay for her!!

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        kali September 1, 2011, 6:03 pm

        …or maybe trolls. They purple thumb everything.

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    TheeCoolOne August 31, 2011, 12:39 pm

    That’s what normally happens. When you stop looking you meet someone naturally. Great update 😀

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      MsMisery August 31, 2011, 1:48 pm

      Yeah, and now they come out of the woodwork!

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  • landygirl

    Landygirl August 31, 2011, 12:46 pm

    I love a good update!

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    MonMon August 31, 2011, 2:00 pm

    Yep, there’s something about a confident woman who is happy with who she is with or without a man, that attracts and interests men.

    Good for you LW! 🙂

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  • avatar

    anonymous August 31, 2011, 2:15 pm

    FWIW, I’m fairly plump (“fluffy”, my husband says), not particularly attractive, and REGULARLY have guys making passes at me despite my age (41). I’ve been married 20 years, to boot, and have 5 kids.

    The reason? Self-confidence, and a willingness to be open with other people.

    We’re rooting for you! Keep going onward and upward!

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  • Jess

    Jess of CityGirlsWorld.com August 31, 2011, 2:21 pm

    YAY!

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