Updates: “Photo Finish” Responds
It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Photo Finish” who was pissed that her ex hadn’t removed photos of her from his Flickr page and that he was using a photo she took on his online dating profile. A bunch of us told her to MOA; after the jump, find out whether she decided to follow that advice.
Basically, you and a lot of the commenters were correct. I needed to MOA. But it is hard to do, especially when I felt like he never gave me any closure when we ended our relationship.
I did not put all the details in my letter (like him using the photo I’d taken of him on his online profile WHEN we were actually “still together”), and didn’t make everything very clear. I’d like to add that a lot of the comments I had looked at were sort of cruel in my opinion, and actually turned me off. I think this a lot with other articles as well. I guess I’d hoped people would be supportive, or offer tips instead of what I had read.In actual update news: I went to therapy to help me MOA because I was stuck in a loop, and in a toxic friendship that encouraged me to keep tabs on my ex. I would like to report that therapy has helped a lot, and I’m well on my way to moving on. I haven’t looked at any of his things online, because it really doesn’t matter. It won’t change anything. And I don’t have feelings for him like I once did. I also cut the toxic friendship off, and it helped me process my feelings about my ex as well.
Thanks for the update, and I’m glad therapy is giving you the kind of closure you didn’t feel you got from your ex. Best of luck to you.
If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at email@example.com with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.