Updates: “Trying to Figure it All Out Ahead of Time” Responds
It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing now. Today we hear from “Trying to Figure it All Out Ahead of Time” who had found the man she thought she might want to spend her life with but was worried that they were both ambivalent about wanting children one day. “What would happen if we get married and one of us decides we really do want children while the other is still on the fence or possibly has shifted more towards not wanting them?” Keep reading to see if they reached a resolution on this issue.
Thanks for running my question in your column a few months ago. Your response and the feedback from readers was very reassuring. It was reassuring to know that this is a dilemma many couples face and that you don’t need to have it figured out right away. I discussed it more with my boyfriend, and we decided to keep the lines of communication open regarding our feelings and how they might change on this subject and to “cross the bridge of children” as Wendy put it, if/when we get there. We’ve talked over marriage some more, and we plan to be engaged within the year. In the meantime I’m happy to report that, after careful consideration and of course consulting all of Wendy’s articles on the topic, Brandon and I will be cohabiting by May 15th, and we have plans to adopt a very cute minipig. Perhaps that will fill our parental needs for a while.
Ooh, minipig, how cute! Have fun and good luck to you guys.
If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.
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