Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Weekend Open Thread

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Happy Friday! I don’t know about you, but I had a long week — one that involved cleaning up multiple children’s puke, pee, poop, and a spilled glass of red wine (full) on a beige rug (salt is the cure, if this ever happens to you), and don’t even get me started on the freezapalooza we’ve been experiencing here in NYC (and most of the country). It was snowing this morning, so I used that as a handy excuse to keep Jackson home from school since I didn’t feel like commuting the one-mile with him in the winter mess. (Seriously, whose idea was it to enroll him in preschool a mile away?? We’re urban folk without a car; everything essential — bread, milk, wine, cheese, and school — should be within a 3-block radius from home or WHAT’S THE POINT?). Anyhoo, we skipped school this morning and went for a snowy walk instead, meeting up with my friend, Mary, at the coffee shop, and then going grocery shopping and then coming home and eating string cheese and applesauce, so I guess that’s not a bad way to spend a Friday morning.

Now it’s the weekend and I don’t really have any plans except finally renting “Boyhood” with Drew tonight, since we missed it in the theater and it became available on Netflix this week, and then meeting my friend Matt tomorrow for brunch and then hitting a flea market.

Ooh! Do you want to hear a confession? After years of thinking and talking about it, Drew and I took the plunge and bought a TV for our bedroom. It arrived yesterday and Drew’s going to set it all up this evening, in time for our “Boyhood” viewing (I hope). I know everyone says a TV in the bedroom ruins marriages and, as a “relationship expert” of sorts, I should know better, but I DON’T CARE. I want to watch movies in bed! So, we’re doing it. And if our marriage starts going down the shitter and we stop, like, acknowledging each other because we are so transfixed by the large screen in our room, then I guess we’ll just have to list the damn TV on Craigslist or something and hope it’s not too late to piece back together our matrimonial harmony. But until then: MOVIES IN BED, MOVIES IN BEDDDDDD!

30 comments… add one
  • honeybeenicki

    honeybeenicki January 9, 2015, 4:09 pm

    We have always had a TV in our room and we both love it. What’s really handy are the satellite music channels. They have a dark gray screen but play music without the annoying commercials that a radio has.

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  • LadyinPurpleNotRed

    LadyinPurpleNotRed January 9, 2015, 4:37 pm

    Yeah. We have a tv. We don’t have cable hooked up in there, but we do have chrome cast, which is awesome. It keeps the laptop out of the bed when we are watching something and then when we want to get frisky, it’s not in the way.

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  • Pamplemousse Rose

    Pamplemousse Rose January 9, 2015, 5:00 pm

    Illness has been rampant in our house. I was sick earlier this week and now I am also dealing with a sick child. I think she has an ear infection and the only way she will sleep is on me. I haven’t left the house all week. We have a dr. appt. at 5:15 and I’m going to pick up sushi for dinner on the way home. Other than that, I need to do a big grocery shop (I haven’t since we got back from our vacation on Sunday and everyone fell ill) and spend the weekend convalescing.

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    • Pamplemousse Rose

      Pamplemousse Rose January 9, 2015, 5:02 pm

      We also don’t have a TV in our bedroom, but mostly because our room is too small (old wartime house). When we have a larger room, we will get a TV because I agree MOVIES IN BED

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  • avatar

    Jane63 January 9, 2015, 7:20 pm

    Congrats n your TV! And movies bed!

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  • Lyra

    Lyra January 9, 2015, 8:12 pm

    OUR DATE IS BOOKED!!!! Wooooo!!!! I heard today from our reception venue that our deposit is now official and we will be getting married on our first choice date in August!!!! Sooooo excited!!!!!
    .
    I agree this week has been a LONG and ROUGH week and I’m not entirely sure why. I had a sick/snow/cold day on Wednesday which was nice but it felt a bit difficult to get back into the swing of things. I also slept like crap on Wednesday night which didn’t help. But…weekend! Yaaaaay weekend!! I don’t plan on doing much of anything. 🙂

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    • Lyra

      Lyra January 9, 2015, 8:30 pm

      Also, is it normal for dads to push Save the Dates? My dad is being very incessant about it and I’m not sure what to think about it. We’re trying to save as much money as possible in the wedding, and though I am VERY thankful my parents are being so generous and gifting us a good amount of money for the wedding, I don’t want to spend over $100 on postage just to send them out only to go and send out a bazillion wedding invitations and spending who knows how much on postage there. I can get the invites/STD cards for a very cheap price through a family member, but every penny counts!!

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      • Pamplemousse Rose

        Pamplemousse Rose January 9, 2015, 10:13 pm

        Have you thought about an email STD through evite or something like that?

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      • Lyra

        Lyra January 9, 2015, 10:58 pm

        I’ve already emailed my immediate family because they were asking and had wanted to get it on their calendars. I also told my close friends and bridal party, plus those family and friends who would have to travel a ways. Fortunately the majority of my family and friends are local.

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      • Lady_Red

        Red_Lady January 10, 2015, 10:32 am

        Well, the main purpose of STDs is to let out-of-towners know ahead of time so that they can make the necessary arrangements (at least, I think that’s the purpose). And it sounds like you’ve already done that. I think they’re just another way to waste money on weddings. Maybe you can compromise with your dad by sending out the invitations a little earlier than normal?

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      • Lyra

        Lyra January 10, 2015, 10:48 am

        Yeah that’s what I think too. If we can find a way to do a postcard though that might be a good way to compromise too. Save some money. I was bursting to tell EVERYONE so I told my closest friends and family last night when I found out.

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      • kaluu

        kaluu January 11, 2015, 5:45 pm

        Email or telling in person (perfect for coworkers) is what I have received and would do

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      • avatar

        snow.angel January 9, 2015, 10:35 pm

        It’s definitely good form to send out Save the Dates about 6 months before the wedding so that guests can make travel arrangements and start to think about requesting time off from work. It’s especially considerate in your case since it’s a summertime wedding which is usually a higher volume travel/vacation period, and it can be more expensive for guests to arrange and also harder to get time off from work. I’d also consider the timing of when you send them, I had one friend send out Save the Dates over a year before the wedding which was kind of excessive, while I had another one send her’s out within a month or so of the formal invitation which was also sort of silly. August will be here soooo fast, so maybe that’s why your dad is pushing the issue…it probably would be best to get them out sooner rather than later if you do decide to send them.

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      • Lyra

        Lyra January 9, 2015, 11:02 pm

        Yeah I mean I totally understand their purpose and I can see why they’re important. But my family asked specifically to know right away in order to get it on their calendars and plan showers, and my friends from out of town asked me to let them know so they could book flights and all that. Maybe I’ll look into postcard style cards so I don’t have to spend so much on the postage…

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      • Moneypenny

        Moneypenny January 10, 2015, 2:50 am

        Oh postcards are the best! You can do a lot of fun stuff with the design and everything. My cousin and his wife recently did postcard thank-you’s- the front was a photo of them from the wedding, and the back (with the address) was the thank you note from them. It turned out very cute!

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      • Lyra

        Lyra January 10, 2015, 9:38 am

        I may have to do that! That sounds adorable. 🙂

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      • call-me-hobo

        call-me-hobo January 10, 2015, 1:01 pm

        I sent all mine out about 6 months-ish from my actual date. I know that the postage is expensive, but I worked my way around it by drawing my own invitation and having it copied at Staples, and using generic envelopes I bought from Michael’s. For invitations PLUS save the dates, including postage, it cost about $120 and we had about 130 guests.

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      • Lyra

        Lyra January 10, 2015, 1:34 pm

        Nice!! Teach me your ways, @call-me-hobo!! 😉

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      • Lianne

        Lianne January 12, 2015, 9:01 am

        I used paperless post. I spent about $17 to send really cute email save the dates to about 100 people. It’s cheaper than printing and postage and less time consuming, in my opinion. Just a thought!

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  • avatar

    d2 January 9, 2015, 11:47 pm

    When single, the TV in the bedroom never worked out for me. I would have it because I was bored, then would fall asleep with it on and never get a decent night’s sleep.
    When coupled, the TV in the bedroom worked out fine. We would only have it on for special occasions to watch a movie together.

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    • kaluu

      kaluu January 11, 2015, 5:48 pm

      Oh I used to do that too:( that’s a terrible feeling to wake up on the cold sofa with infomercials on

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  • othy

    othy January 10, 2015, 12:17 am

    A TV in the bedroom sounds like pure hell to me. Othello already watches youtube videos on his phone at bedtime, and it drives me nuts. The artificial light kills my ability to fall asleep.

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    • Portia

      Portia January 10, 2015, 9:47 pm

      Yes! I downloaded a filter app on Bassanio’s phone so the light wouldn’t keep me awake.

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      • othy

        othy January 11, 2015, 4:05 pm

        Ooh, what’s it called? I need to get that for him.

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  • avatar

    Sunshine Brite January 10, 2015, 5:15 pm

    There’s so many times I wish we had another tv for the bedroom since I like to watch tv in bed on my lazy days. I wonder if Mr Ginger knows how often he’s going to get woken up by a tv since I wake up a couple hours before him on the weekends if we get one for the bedroom at our new place.

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  • Portia

    Portia January 10, 2015, 9:45 pm

    Lol, to each their own on the TV-in-the-bedroom thing. Me and Bassanio agreed a long time ago on no TV in the bedroom. Maybe even no technology in the bedroom one day… But that’s very unlikely.
    .
    Also, going to a family wedding a few weeks after getting engaged? Maybe not the best timing, there’s been a lot of questions. Although hearing more from Bassanio’s family members has made me feel better about the level of involvement our families will think they can have. I think it’s a family tradition (on both sides) to have small weddings then a second celebration thrown by the family. This is sounding more and more like we can pull off something small…

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  • Classic

    Classic January 11, 2015, 2:39 pm

    I love seeing the photos of you and Jackson. You guys, we never get to wear cute furry hats around here.

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  • avatar

    jlyfsh January 11, 2015, 2:50 pm

    We have a tv with a roku in the bedroom. It doesn’t get used often but it’s nice when I’m home sick or on weekend mornings when we want to cuddle in bed and watch something!

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  • Bubbles

    Bubbles January 11, 2015, 7:30 pm

    If a marriage is in trouble, whether or not a TV is in the bedroom, it’s not going to matter. The marriage is going to fail.

    We’ve always had a TV in the bedroom. We love watching movies on the weekends in bed. It’s so relaxing. Also like today, Sunday mornings when it’s cold and rainy (it’s rare in SoCal) to stay in bed and watch TV is so nice!! When our kids were little, they’d jump in bed with us Saturday mornings and watch cartoons for about an hour (that was the only time the kids were allowed in our bed though LOL)

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  • Lyra

    Lyra January 11, 2015, 7:49 pm

    This talk of TVs in bedrooms reminds me of when I would visit my ex at his apartment with his two roommates and how they had like 5 TVs for 3 people. It was a wee bit cuh-razy.

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