Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Weekend Open Thread

I was hoping this week would be better than last week — culturally, socially, personally — but it wasn’t really. I’ve been feeling blue for a variety of reasons and haven’t quite shaken it just yet (almost though). How are all of you? Who needs some support? Or, who is having a great time and wants to share some good news and general positivity with us? What are some things you’re happy about or looking forward to?

I’ll start: In two weeks, Jackson starts preschool and I’m really excited for him. I’m excited about the things he’ll learn and the new friends he’ll make and the growing independence he’ll begin to embrace. I’m also excited about what those few extra hours he’s in someone else’s care each week will mean for me. I’ll have five whole mornings now to myself — to work (on DW, on freelancing, on the books/ bigger projects I never have time for), exercise, maybe meet a friend for an early lunch occasionally. I think it’s going to make such a big difference in our lives, and I think a little more time apart will be great for our mother-son relationship.

My friend, Matt, is coming to NYC for a visit over my birthday weekend in two weeks, and then he is moving here (temporarily, but still) a few weeks after that. I’m so happy one of my closest friends — someone from my old life in Chicago — will be here to help anchor me in this crazy city. He is the most fun to karaoke with and makes me laugh hard, and I’m really looking forward to having him nearby for a while.

I’m taking Jackson to visit my parents again in a little over a month. They moved back to the states last summer after 40 years overseas, and it still feels like a luxury to hop on a plane in the morning and be able to see them a few hours later (and not pay the equivalent of one month’s rent for a plane ticket).

And next week there are TWO episodes of Bachelor in Paradise. Chris Harrison promises they’ll be “the most dramatic ever.” So, there’s that!

Whachoo got?

48 comments… add one
  • gigi

    gigi August 22, 2014, 4:31 pm

    I had a finger injury from 6 weeks ago that hasn’t healed properly. Now its infected & has been probably most of that time…. so I have been feeling pretty crappy & down. Trying a 2nd kind of antibiotic (1st didn’t work) & its strong so I have run the gamut of side effects this week. So much fun. Thought it was FINALLY getting better yesterday, but today its all puffy & sore again. So I am very discouraged. But I still have a few fun things for this weekend, as long as my stomach is feeling OK I am going to carry on!

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    • gigi

      gigi August 22, 2014, 4:36 pm

      Also Wendy – hopefully a weekend of resting & recharging will help whatever situation is giving you the blues, & YAY for school time! So fun to see them learning & growing – plus the alone time ROCKS!

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    • Dear Wendy

      Dear Wendy August 22, 2014, 4:47 pm

      Good luck on fixing the finger! And enjoy the fun things this weekend.

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  • MaterialsGirl

    MaterialsGirl August 22, 2014, 4:35 pm

    1. Soooo my old job called me and i had a lunch meeting. Another meeting scheduled for next week already, but they want me to come back as sales manager. it could be a big promotion potentially, not to mention that having ‘sales manager’ title for this type of company would be great for my resume. Its a really nice position to be in.. to have someone try and woo you away from your job, but with everything happening in my life lately, I could really be putting myself in a good position. I make good money now, but this could be GREAT.

    2. I will be officially ms materialsgirl again next week this time. Our prove up date in court is friday morning and I have a few friends coming along for support. It’s been an interesting ride, for you, but the amount of personal growth as well as happiness (and potential happiness) is more than I could have imagined.

    3. Seeing a good friend tonight for dinner at Purple Pig! Having friends and their kids over tomorrow for some park time. Sunday long run (again) and indian food. YUM!

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    • Dear Wendy

      Dear Wendy August 22, 2014, 4:48 pm

      Congrats on all of the above, Ms. MaterialsGirl.

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      • MaterialsGirl

        MaterialsGirl August 22, 2014, 4:53 pm

        Thanks, Wendy! Happy Champagne Friday, and I hope the only blues in your life this weekend are from Ms Nina Simone.

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      • Dear Wendy

        Dear Wendy August 22, 2014, 5:03 pm

        Thanks. I full plan on being blues-free by weekend’s end.

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    • Lyra

      Lyra August 23, 2014, 11:51 am

      I’m sure it’s been a challenging process with everything. It must be great knowing you’ll be changing back to Ms. MaterialsGirl though! Thinking about you and sending tons of positive vibes!

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  • avatar

    anon August 22, 2014, 4:41 pm

    I’m having a big week. I interviewed for a job that I didn’t think I would get. Not only did they extend an offer on the spot, they asked me what I wanted to be paid. So I told them a number that was a stretch, and they said “sure, we can do that.” It’s basically a 25% raise, it will mean so much for my family. I’m getting my first puppy ever tomorrow. We have also been house hunting for several months, and I think we finally found “the house”- there’s no guarantee our offer will be accepted, but there’s a possibility. New job, new dog, new house…. I thought all the change might be too much, and I’d feel really overwhelmed. But, I’ve been working on processing it all this week and honestly I’ve been sleeping pretty soundly at night. I’m actually really excited now, I think I can do this. Onward and hopefully upward!

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  • avatar

    kryssie81 August 22, 2014, 5:19 pm

    After feeling a bit overwhelmed myself with what is going around the world, I am very happy to say that I’m leaving tonight for my two-week honeymoon in Japan where I am going to read the news very little, eat tons of noodles, and have a blast!

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  • Amanda

    Amanda August 22, 2014, 5:48 pm

    It’s just under two weeks away, but I’m going to the Garth Brooks concert on September 4th. I’m so excited I can hardly stand it!!!

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  • LadyinPurpleNotRed

    LadyinPurpleNotRed August 22, 2014, 6:00 pm

    I sent in my first draft of my thesis and I’m terrified for getting notes back, but revision is my favorite thing so it will be easier than the first draft was. I’m terrified. In a month and a half I defend and that’s scary, but my boyfriend has been amazing. He got me a massage after I sent in my draft, which was incredible.
    Tomorrow I’m going snorkeling for the first time, which I’m scared, but excited for.
    Then unpacking. I can’t wait to be settled in.

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  • avatar

    HmC August 22, 2014, 6:13 pm

    Oh man, I feel your pain Wendy. I don’t like to wallow or spread misery but just to vent for one hot second- today sucked. Hard. I got bitched at by a client for basically no reason (it was sort of a straw that broke the camel’s back situation, and the straw was basically nothing and the other prior stuff had nothing to do with me) and he fucking exploded and threw me and my co-worker under the bus big time (mostly my co-worker, who I like a lot and who I don’t think did anything wrong either). Anyway I’ve been picking up the pieces of that all damn day and my boss is out today and my nerves are shattered and I’m not drinking right now (taking a few weeks just to get healthier) and the only thing in the world that sounds good is a good stiff drink. Or just a nice big shot. Or five.

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    • Dear Wendy

      Dear Wendy August 22, 2014, 6:43 pm

      Get a massage! Or an ice cream sundae. Or go sit in a dark theater and watch a good movie.

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  • mylaray

    mylaray August 22, 2014, 6:33 pm

    I got my dream job this week as an art director. I’ve been a workaholic for years and it’s paid off and it feels great. The bad news is I will be swamped with work all the time and will have less time to travel. But the good news is we will have enough money to not worry about my husband needing another job and we can keep pouring money and time into his band’s music career. And he will be able to come home more often. I’m happy and feel really relieved. So I think I’ll splurge this weekend a little and buy a new bag!

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  • JK

    JK August 22, 2014, 7:14 pm

    I had a good (busy!) week. On tuesday my youngests english teacher had asked me to come in and do an activity with the kids- they try to expose them to a variety of accents). So theybrought togethr the 2 groups of 3 year olds, I read them The Foot Book (I looooove Dr. Seuss) then I helped the kids trace their feet onto coloured paper and they decorated them. When I was leaving they all ran up and smothered me in hugs and kisses. I loved it 🙂

    Also good news? My house is fiiinally getting close to completion! The bathrooms are getting installed, the pool is nearly finished, the painters start soon. I cant wait to move! I love the house and the neighbourhood more and more each time we go. Also, soon after kindy started I discovered one of my youngests classmates lives in the same neighbourhood. And apparently theres a group of kids right around my ones ages that play together a ton. Tentative move date is october sometime, so not much longer!!!

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  • avatar

    Kate August 22, 2014, 7:34 pm

    I can’t believe I did this. I got my hair cut and colored and didn’t have cash for the tip so I went around the corner to the ATM and took out $200 to have cash for the weekend. Then I got back to the salon and didn’t have the money. I didn’t take it!!! WTF. I ran back but it was gone. I stood in line to ask the teller if someone could help me and look at the video but they said no because it isn’t my bank. So I called my own bank and they’re sending me an affidavit, and it looks like I’ll have to file a police report. If someone did take it, they’re pretty ballsy. The machine would have held onto the money and sucked it back in after a certain time, so someone deliberately grabbed it, knowing they’d be on video. It wasn’t like someone could obliviously do a transaction and accidentally take my money with theirs–the machine wouldn’t let them. Anyway, I’m beating myself up. Blah.

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  • avatar

    RedroverRedrover August 22, 2014, 7:39 pm

    Today’s my last day of maternity leave, I start work again on Monday. I have mixed feelings… it’s been 15 months since I left work, and it still hasn’t really hit me that I’m going back. Or that my son’s going to daycare. Next week will be kind of weird because daycare won’t take him till Sept, so I’m having my mom stay with me for the week to watch him. Also my manager will be on vacation. Plus I work from home. So it doesn’t reeeeeally feel like I’m starting back. Maybe it’s nice to be able to ease in.

    Anyway, I’ll miss the time with my son, but I’m really looking forward to being able to make a cup of tea and drink it in peace while it’s still hot. Or eating lunch without trying to feed my son at the same time. Or hell, showering every day and going to the bathroom when I want to. I’m sure I’ll feel guilt, too, but that hasn’t set in yet, so I’ll enjoy the peace and quiet while I can. 🙂

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    • Dear Wendy

      Dear Wendy August 23, 2014, 12:46 pm

      Such a big transition! One thing I wish I didn’t hear so many mothers say is, “I feel guilty.” I’m “guilty” of this too. But why should we feel guilty for working? Or for taking time for ourselves? Do you think as many fathers feel “guilty” that they go to work and earn a living to help support their families? No! You shouldn’t feel guilty about working, and you shouldn’t feel guilty about enjoying a little more freedom and face-to-face time with other adults. Enjoy it all guilt-free! You deserve it.

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      • avatar

        RedroverRedrover August 23, 2014, 4:32 pm

        Thanks Wendy, I’ll try! I’m a pretty selfish person anyway, so that should help. 🙂

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  • Addie Pray

    Addie Pray August 22, 2014, 8:33 pm

    Hi! I’ve been on vacation the past week. What did I miss – re Dear Wendy and life in general? I’ve been without cell service for a week and limited access to the Internet – I feel so out of touch! It’s still just 2014, right? On the flip side, I’ve had more walks into town for ice cream than I can count on 5 hands. I’ve decided that it turns out I’m not a city girl. I’m an idyllic-sleepy-town-on-the-water girl.

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    • Addie Pray

      Addie Pray August 22, 2014, 8:39 pm

      Whoops I didn’t finish my thought. So, what I’m trying to say is I really want to move to st. Joseph, michigan or a town like that. I love Chicago but I think I’m better suited here. How can I move here?

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  • something random

    something random August 22, 2014, 8:43 pm

    Weekend house?

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    • Addie Pray

      Addie Pray August 22, 2014, 8:56 pm

      Yes! My new goal: save up for a lake house!

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      • Addie Pray

        Addie Pray August 22, 2014, 9:03 pm

        (It’s gonna take f-o-r-e-v-e-r, but I’m working on it starting…. now!)

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      • Portia

        Portia August 23, 2014, 3:14 pm

        Yes! So many people I knew from Michigan had a lake house (and a bunch from the Chicago area, but most of those were in Wisconsin…). We used to go to South Haven when I was younger and I loved it then, and I think I would still like it now, but it’s been a long time since we’ve been there.

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  • FireStar

    FireStar August 22, 2014, 9:05 pm

    It’s been a mixed up kind of day. I had an uncle pass away. And an ex who contacted me about four weeks ago to tell me he is dying is MIA. He wanted to meet up but I feel bad because I had to postpone meeting up with him because of an unexpected medical thing. But I haven’t heard back from him when I emailed him. I hope he is okay but there is no way to know really unless he gets on touch. It’s kind of hanging over my head that I cancelled (but I was literally under my desk curled up in pain). But that still seems weak given what he must be going through.

    On the plus side – Munchkin took her first steps today! She’s such a big girl now!

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    • Classic

      Classic August 22, 2014, 9:41 pm

      First steps! Wow yaaayy!

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  • call-me-hobo

    call-me-hobo August 22, 2014, 10:45 pm

    I’m so excited; my wedding is less than a month away! AHHHHHHH!!! I’m so happy, AND we’ve been additionally blessed with the opportunity to take a honeymoon. So I’ve been looking up the best places to get a burrito on Pacific Highway 1 for the better part of an hour.

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  • TheLadyE

    TheLadyE August 23, 2014, 1:59 am

    It’s been a rough week. I had to take my precious little poodle to the vet, I work in sales and it’s been a slow month, and this month’s events (particularly Robin Williams’ tragic death) are weighing HARD on me. So I guess I kind of have the blues as well.

    I also have some career choices to make in the next six months to a year or so, and I’m totally at a loss as to what to do. It’s a good problem to have: I’m at a great company where I’m valued and appreciated, but I don’t want to pigeonhole myself in my early 30’s into a career that I won’t be happy with 10, 20, 30 years down the line. Even so, it’s wonderfully nice to have options (after 5+ years of struggling in “this economy”), so there’s that as a plus, definitely.

    All that to say, this month has been kind of awful but I believe it can get better!

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  • avatar

    snoopy128 August 23, 2014, 10:47 am

    Having a low-low-low key weekend after a long summer of crazy weekends. I”m basically getting stuff done around my apartment, maybe hanging with my dad a bit to run errands and stop him from being so lonely while my mom is away (for a whole 5 days!). I have my cousin’s baby shower tomorrow, which I”m excited for, but I”m also worried she’s taking on too much since there will be a lot of people and she has a colicky 4 week old baby. I’m glad I got to see him already, but I posted photos on facebook without realizing it would make another cousin of mine jealous that I saw him first (ugh, minor family dramatics). I think my role at the shower will be just keeping people entertained and to make sure the baby isn’t too over-stimulated and my cousin is doing ok. As much as I want more baby cuddles, I know it would be better if I back off and let others have a go.

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  • Lyra

    Lyra August 23, 2014, 12:04 pm

    This week has gone fast. August has been rather insane trying to juggle the equivalent of 3 jobs and I really wish I could take some sort of a break between now and the beginning of school a week from Tuesday! Labor Day weekend may be that for me. I just need some peace and quiet and as much time to sleep as possible.
    .
    Positive news from my end of the world is that I got to spend some quality time with my bestie yesterday and it was really fun to catch up, drink some wine, watch Disney movies, and hang out at her place. We both like to just sit at home on Friday nights so it was fun to sit at “home” together and just relax. She’s a fantastic friend and I’m lucky to have her in my life.
    .
    I’m realizing what a happy, healthy relationship I have with Navy Guy. There are still things that we need to learn about each other, but it has been a good pace for us. He has been slower to open up than I am but it’s obvious he has been gradually getting much more comfortable and with that the relationship has been getting even better. We have pretty good conflict resolution too. I unfortunately have a short fuse sometimes and he handles that like a champ. I had to laugh when one of my (young) Facebook friends posted this quote last night that was about how couples who fight all the time are stronger than those who don’t fight ever. Ummmmm no. Fighting all the time is flat-out exhausting and a sign that things aren’t working. Not fighting means that you get along pretty well and if you have arguments you talk about things instead of letting it fester and getting super upset about it.
    .
    This weekend is going to be pretty low key. I have some things to take care of around my apartment and some errands to run, but other than that I’m going to be spending a lot of time reading and hanging out with NG and my cats. 🙂

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    • Lyra

      Lyra August 23, 2014, 10:22 pm

      Oh man y’all…Navy Guy and I had our first fight tonight. It was dumb (aren’t they always?) but it was kind of a culmination of me being fed up with certain things at work and being ridiculously stressed out before school starts in a week plus this little thing. Basically, he’s a picky eater and did NOT tell me that when we first started dating. He said “I’ll eat anything you put in front of me”. Well……..up until this point every time I’ve cooked for him he seems to find something he doesn’t like about it and it was just one too many times tonight. I told him I would rather him say nothing at all (unless he absolutely hates something of course) because I was feeling offended — I mean, he told me he would eat anything!!! PLUS when I ask him what he’s in the mood for he will say “I don’t know”. He was eating mush in the Navy for 6 years and anything I make is better than that. So him being picky REALLY got to me and I just blew up. He’s not a good cook and he eats frozen food all the time so it’s just really frustrating when I put a lot of effort into something and he turns his nose up at it — usually because he’s not used to the way I prepare something or whatever. Tonight I unfortunately let it fester for a while and just sat there quietly until I just had to tell him what was going on. I did, and then everything about work and stress just spilled out.
      .
      I didn’t handle myself so well unfortunately but he definitely handled it well and listened calmly. I said what I needed to say and he understood where I was coming from. So from here on out I’m planning the meals because he’s so ridiculously indecisive haha.

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  • Dear Wendy

    Dear Wendy August 23, 2014, 12:52 pm

    It is nearly 1 PM and i haven’t showered yet. I have, however, cooked a great breakfast for my family, gone for a run, grocery shopped, cooked lunch, and played with Jackson at the playground. Also, cat cuddles. I’m hoping Jack takes a nap so I can take one too, or maybe just read a little bit and do some DW work for next week. Yesterday, a friend came over for lunch and we split a bottle of wine because Friday, and then I went to another friends’ home last night since her husband was out and three of us split two more bottles of wine. So, no drinking for me today and probably the rest of the weekend. I gotta save up my allowance for Bachelor in Paradise ’cause you really need to drink a little something to full appreciate that show.

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    • avatar

      snoopy128 August 23, 2014, 1:53 pm

      Showers are totally over-rated some days!

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      • Dear Wendy

        Dear Wendy August 23, 2014, 3:03 pm

        I did manage to shower finally. And jackson went down for a nap, which is always a treat, and I have celebrated by doing absolutely nothing and it’s perfect.

        Also, I saw Keri Russell at the farmers market this morning and I have to report that she seemed, from the 10 seconds I saw her, very friendly and down to earth. I wouldn’t have even noticed her except some fans were making a big show of recognizing her and saying hello. She was talking to a family, and i heard the mother say about her daughter, “You’ll never guess what her name is!!” I was out of earshot before she shared the name. Any guesses? I say Felicity.

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      • Addie Pray

        Addie Pray August 24, 2014, 12:23 pm

        so cool! lately – i don’t know why – but lately i’ve been thinking it would be really cool to hang out with elisabeth shue (sp?) and elizabeth banks – partly b/c i just think banks is probably really cool IRL and i just rewatched Adventures in Babysitting and was reminded how much I also love shue. So, there you go. If anyone runs into them please report back STAT!

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      • Addie Pray

        Addie Pray August 24, 2014, 12:32 pm

        also, when i think about celebrities, it is ALWAYS – well, like 99 times out of 100 – about cool female actors i want to be friends with. I’m rarely thinking about/day dreaming about hot male actors. What does that say about me?

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      • Dear Wendy

        Dear Wendy August 24, 2014, 2:01 pm

        Clearly, you are a lesbian.

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    • TheLadyE

      TheLadyE August 23, 2014, 10:02 pm

      It was after 5pm when I showered…after cooking lunch, talking with my mom and then my sister, a nap and lots of cuddles with my dog. So don’t feel badly! 🙂

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  • Portia

    Portia August 23, 2014, 3:05 pm

    Me and Bassanio just hit 9 years this week, officially. And we left on an anniversary vacation for a few days, so, that’s my weekend… Hope everyone else’s weekends are looking up!

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