Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

What Do You Want From Me?!

Can you believe a new year is soon upon us? It is! 2014, y’all! And, as I do before any new year begins, I’ve been thinking a lot about my goals, both personal and professional and everything in between. This was a pretty good year, I think. In terms of DW, traffic grew moderately, the forums have really taken off (that was a goal of mine), and revenue increased 50%, meaning I actually make a tiny profit now. Next year, I would love the traffic to grow a lot more and to see another 50% (at least!) increase in revenue. I hope to have an eBook ready early in the year and a podcast going by the second half of the year and a more mobile-friendly site within a few months.

Beyond that, I am open to suggestions. What would you love to see more of (or less of) from DearWendy.com in 2014? Of course, I have limited resources and I can’t make any promises, but I definitely want to make user/readers’ experience as pleasant and positive as possible, so tell me what that means for you. And thank you in advance for not turning this into a big bitch session about how you hate such-and-such thing or that one commenter or you think the site is “too white” (someone emailed that complaint to me recently and she meant it, like, literally. Like, the white on her screen hurt her eyes).

153 comments… add one
  • avatar

    Morgan December 11, 2013, 9:07 am

    More mobile friendly! I read Dear Wendy on my phone A LOT and some days my phone is happier to do that than others.

    But seriously, this site is awesome!

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  • avatar

    Christy December 11, 2013, 9:12 am

    I have a bunch of tiny suggestions about the site:
    1. Can the Forums link on the top of the page have a drop-down for each of the forums? For example, we can hover over About and see FAQ and Advertise. Can we hover over Forums and see the different Forum names?
    2. Sometimes when my Chrome window isn’t wide enough, the text itself gets really wide, like wider than the window, and the forum information goes to the bottom. It seems like it’s not supposed to happen.
    3. Can we have a way to mark spam in the forums? It might help you delete it, maybe?

    Content-wise, don’t change anything, you’re perfect.

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    • avatar

      ktfran December 11, 2013, 9:19 am

      Ooh, I get the google chrome problem too. I have to keep stretching it, but I don’t like stretching too far because I don’t want people at work to know I’m ahem, not working . . .

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    • avatar

      Christy December 11, 2013, 9:43 am

      Yay for making the forum change! I’m really excited about that.

      One thing that I noticed while just commenting. When giving a thumbs-up to someone, the text changes from “0 likes” to “Vote Saved. New Rating: 1″. It’s just bulkier that way. Is there any way to change it from “0 likes” to “1 likes”? It’s totally minor but I figured I’d mention it. Sometimes I still have thumb problems, but I think that might because my work computer is so old.

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      • avatar

        lemongrass December 11, 2013, 9:48 am

        I get thumb problems too once the comments get over a certain amount.

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      • CatsMeow

        CatsMeow December 11, 2013, 9:57 am

        Yeah, once the comments get to around 200, I can’t see the thumbs anymore. 🙁

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      • avatar

        Taylor December 11, 2013, 12:37 pm

        Yep!

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      • Fabelle

        Fabelle December 11, 2013, 12:41 pm

        Oooh yeah, me too! I’ve sort of grown to like it though, because then it represents to me how crazy a thread has gotten? Like it means the thread has likely become some kind of lawless free-for-all, haha

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      • Dear Wendy

        Wendy December 11, 2013, 8:37 pm

        I know, I don’t like that either, but unfortunately, I haven’t found a way to get around while still keeping the size and design of the thumbs, which are custom-designed and seem to be well-liked.

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  • avatar

    bethany December 11, 2013, 9:13 am

    Yeah, I agree with more mobile friendly. I like to DW on my phone while I drink wine on the couch 🙂

    One other thing might be to have a better “profile” section. Like, when we click on our pictures, it tell us some stats about forum topics started or whatever, and it seems like you should be able to see what forums you’ve commented on/started, but it doesn’t work?

    I dont’ know if any of you guys go on the younghouselove forums, but theirs have a nice tracking system, so you can tell if there’s been any activity on the sections you’ve posted in vs getting an email every single time there’s a posting after you.

    And to the “Too White” person, adjust the contrast/brightness on your screen. I did that yesterday, because I felt like my eyes were going to fall out (from work, n0t DW), and it’s helped a lot.

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    • avatar

      lets_be_honest December 11, 2013, 9:23 am

      Oh that would be cool! (profile showing which forums we started, recent comments too maybe).

      I don’t like change though. I love the site just the way it is!

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    • CatsMeow

      CatsMeow December 11, 2013, 9:43 am

      The profile thing would be cool if we wanted to fill out some personal info, but I’m not so sure I’d want everyone to so easily see some of the stuff I wrote in about, haha. I know it’s accessible if people really want to dig, but it’s embarrassing! 🙂

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      • avatar

        bethany December 11, 2013, 9:56 am

        True that. I didn’t think about that!

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      • avatar

        Liquid Luck December 11, 2013, 11:01 am

        Maybe there could be a way to make it private then? That way people could see their own/have it accessible to others if they don’t mind, but those who don’t want it all out there can have that option too.

        (I know nothing about computers, so I’m not sure how difficult this might be. I just know it’s possible since other sites I frequent do this!)

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  • theattack

    theattack December 11, 2013, 9:17 am

    Yayy!!! I’m so glad you’re turning a profit now, even if it is tiny. I agree with Morgan about a mobile friendly site, and I’m glad to see that on your list, Wendy. Reading the posts and the comments aren’t terrible on my iPhone (but could be better), but the forums are nearly impossible to use on the phone. (Of course nothing is going to stop me from using the site on my phone, so clearly it’s not a dire situation) I always enjoy your non-advice writing as well, both your creative writing and your non-fiction writing about interesting things, like yesterday’s post about reproduction. I hope you continue to do that and/or do it more often. Other than that, keep doing what you’re doing because it’s awesome!

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    • avatar

      TECH December 11, 2013, 9:32 am

      I agree, I love the creative writing and essay pieces.

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  • Dear Wendy

    Wendy December 11, 2013, 9:18 am

    Thanks for the suggestions so far, everyone! Some will be much easier to implement than others (Christy, the forum drop down menu is easy — I will do that later today when Jackson goes down for his nap). Some suggestions may not be possible for a while, if at all, but these are still really helpful. Even if I can’t take care of something right away, it’s good to know what people would appreciate/enjoy, etc.

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  • Dear Wendy

    Wendy December 11, 2013, 9:20 am

    Oh, and definitely a more mobile-friendly site is at the top of my list and has been for a while. I’ve been in touch with a couple companies that help turn sites into more app-like mobile-friendly sites, but they don’t/can’t do much with forums just yet. That has been the cause of the hold up. But I am definitely working on it and hope, hope, hope to have something easier to use on iPhones soon (realistically maybe within three months?).

    Reply Link
  • avatar

    csp December 11, 2013, 9:21 am

    I liked “His Take” and that hasn’t been around in awhile.

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    • avatar

      Lily in NYC December 11, 2013, 9:51 am

      That was one of my favorite features here! I’d love to see it return.

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      • avatar

        ktfran December 11, 2013, 10:25 am

        I concur.

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      • avatar

        MissDre December 11, 2013, 12:12 pm

        Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think the reason Wendy stopped doing it is because people weren’t requesting to have their letters answered by guys.

        I liked the His Take too.

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    • CatsMeow

      CatsMeow December 11, 2013, 11:04 am

      Really? I wasn’t too crazy about it.

      Reply Link
      • Fabelle

        Fabelle December 11, 2013, 12:14 pm

        Yeahh. Same.

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  • GatorGirl

    GatorGirl December 11, 2013, 9:25 am

    I’m not sure if it’s possible, but if there are more partner sites you could work with to keep increasing your revenue I think that is a great idea. Maybe a monthly wish list (I think you started doing that for a little this year) to drum up some shopping?

    Otherwise I like the content, love the forums, love your advice.

    Reply Link
  • Fabelle

    Fabelle December 11, 2013, 9:28 am

    Yeah, I feel like everything is good. I like the content, the forums, the site design… & I hate change. haha

    Reply Link
  • avatar

    kerrycontrary December 11, 2013, 9:31 am

    I’m glad things keep growing for you, Wendy! I really like the gift lists/shopping lists so if you could keep up with those it would be great. I would assume these bring in revenue for you as well. I also like your personal creative writing a lot. I like the forums but I wish they were more user friendly or something. Maybe I just don’t like the nature/set up of forums in general and there isn’t much to do. I guess I don’t like how responses are on multiple pages (some get up to like 20 pages!), and you want to see how someone responded to you, but then you have to find whether you commented on page 11 or 13 or what have you. Could you add an option to “see this topic in one page” or something? Anyways, thanks for this awesome site I’m so glad you separated from TF and started your own site!

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    • theattack

      theattack December 11, 2013, 9:35 am

      Ooo yes to the gift guides! I would be perfectly happy to have those at completely random times of the year too. They’re probably a lot of work to put together, but the more the better.

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    • avatar

      csp December 11, 2013, 11:43 am

      along the gift guides idea. maybe do a “great books for a breakup” Or “great self help books” OR “great summer reads”. I felt like the book club was hard timing but I am always looking for new books to read and it could help with your amazon commission too.

      Reply Link
      • avatar

        Banana December 11, 2013, 2:10 pm

        Please tell people to buy my book, LOL.

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  • avatar

    Holly December 11, 2013, 9:32 am

    I’d definitely like more “In Other Words” columns, and maybe a return of “If They Asked”? Those were really fun *and* relevant. Also maybe a call for more guest columns? That would help lighten things up for you and some of them were really good/interesting.

    Reply Link
    • avatar

      bethany December 11, 2013, 9:40 am

      Yes to “If they asked”!

      Reply Link
    • Fabelle

      Fabelle December 11, 2013, 9:45 am

      What was “if they asked”? I don’t remember those.

      Also, re: the guest column & “his take” (which someone mentioned before) I know people always suggest that, & they can be fun & change it up a little, but sometimes they seemed so… off. So Wendy, if you do decide to incorporate these things more, I’d suggest sort of editing them? working with the guest-writers? or something? in order to make sure they keep with the tone of the site. If that makes sense. Obviously that would wind up…not… lightening the load for you at all, but it’s just a thought!

      Reply Link
      • theattack

        theattack December 11, 2013, 9:50 am

        Agreed. His Take was a good idea generally, but Wendy might not want to leave the content of her site’s advice up to others who maybe aren’t as experienced in giving advice as she is.

        I do wish we had more men around here though. Is there a way we could attract the menfolk and keep them around? (Copy/pasted directly from 80% of Wendy’s letters)

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest December 11, 2013, 10:18 am

        I wonder if she could do a Her Take/His Take instead? She gives her advice and he gives his. Would be interesting to see the differences.

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      • avatar

        Christy December 11, 2013, 10:27 am

        I like this idea a lot!

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      • Fabelle

        Fabelle December 11, 2013, 10:28 am

        I feel like the men we ~do~ have here have been quiet lately, also! I like having men here (besides ::cough cough:: ones whose name rhymes with Punt… Drown…), & the ones that have stuck around are great.

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      • CatsMeow

        CatsMeow December 11, 2013, 10:34 am

        I have no idea who you’re talking about. For real. OHHHH just got it. Never mind. I can think of a couple more too… like… Dawn Lohan…

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      • theattack

        theattack December 11, 2013, 10:42 am

        I can’t figure it out either…

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      • Fabelle

        Fabelle December 11, 2013, 10:44 am

        Hunt Brown (I’ll just say it since he’s not here anymore, & I think I recall Wendy formally telling him to take his business elsewhere… )

        & Cats haha, yours took ME a second to get… but I got it 😉

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      • mrmidtwenties

        mrmidtwenties December 11, 2013, 10:56 am

        I can’t figure these out, I hope none of them are me

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      • theattack

        theattack December 11, 2013, 10:58 am

        Dude, you need to comment more! Where have you been?

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      • mrmidtwenties

        mrmidtwenties December 11, 2013, 11:04 am

        I’ve been here, just nothing to say apparently :p
        But where are the other dudes? We’ve all been quiet

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      • CatsMeow

        CatsMeow December 11, 2013, 11:05 am

        We need Budj to come back too!

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      • Kate B.

        Kate B. December 11, 2013, 2:54 pm

        I know who you’re talking about now, but at first I was clueless. I came up with a really crude alternative to “Punt Down’ though.

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      • Classic

        Classic December 11, 2013, 12:22 pm

        I agree they have been quiet. I feel that I have been very patient, waiting for Tax Geek to report in about his date on Sunday.

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      • avatar

        Tax Geek December 11, 2013, 3:03 pm

        Rats! You remembered. It went fine I guess. But I may be one of those divorced guys who’s not ready to date yet.

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      • iwannatalktosampson

        iwannatalktosampson December 11, 2013, 3:28 pm

        Did you have morning mimosas? Because everyone is ready to date if it involves mimosas. But seriously – you should tell us about it even if it sucked, and you were the one that made it suck. Isn’t it funny how we always hear about the bad dates from the people saying the other person sucked? I’m sure we’ve all BEEN the bad date at some point in our lives. So if that was you this weekend taxgeek, spill.

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      • avatar

        Tax Geek December 11, 2013, 3:56 pm

        I don’t know that I’ve ever had a mimosa. OK, just Googled and maybe I have once or twice. I even have Champagne at home in my fridge, but it was a Christmas present from last year (too long?). I might have to try to make one (or more) soon.

        Anyway, I don’t think she drinks and I didn’t have any alcohol either. We had brunch and then it was my idea to go to a local museum for a couple hours before I had to get to my son’s basketball game (which had been rescheduled after we had scheduled our date). I just feel I didn’t keep up my side of the conversation. She said she had fun though and we’re still in communication, so maybe I’m being too hard on myself.

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest December 11, 2013, 4:08 pm

        WHATTTTT? Go make a mimosa NOW.

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      • iwannatalktosampson

        iwannatalktosampson December 11, 2013, 4:12 pm

        I used to hate them but then one morning I had 7 and now I’ve acquired a taste for them. Plus it makes day drinking that much classier.

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest December 11, 2013, 4:16 pm

        Its the only acceptable way to get drunk in the morning. And don’t anyone bring up that weird tomato drink!

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      • Roxy_84

        Roxy_84 December 11, 2013, 4:28 pm

        @lbh – agreed on bloody mary. Ick. Ceasar, however, now you’re living. (switch tomato for clamato juice and add tobasco and worschester)

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      • avatar

        Tax Geek December 11, 2013, 4:54 pm

        How about we compromise and I’ll make one when I get home tonight?

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      • avatar

        Tax Geek December 12, 2013, 7:57 am

        But apparently I failed to liberate a corkscrew when I moved out 2 1/2 years ago…

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      • avatar

        Tax Geek December 11, 2013, 3:21 pm

        And Classic, thanks for thinking of me.

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    • avatar

      shanshantastic December 11, 2013, 10:05 am

      I agree with guest columns, I was just scrolling down to say that! I think it would help you focus more on the other columns Holly mentioned without taking up much more of your time.

      Also, not sure if you still have someone helping you out but I’d be down for some editorial assistance if/when you need. 🙂

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  • avatar

    lemongrass December 11, 2013, 9:38 am

    I love your personal essays because I’m secretly stalking you. Or because I feel like I’m a year behind you in life and it has been nice to see what life may be like for me ahead.
    Also a permanent link for your amazon.ca site. Maybe under ‘support’ you could list all your links as well?

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  • CatsMeow

    CatsMeow December 11, 2013, 9:46 am

    I’m not sure why, but lately I haven’t been getting email updates on some of the forum topics I’ve requested email updates on. Has anyone else had this problem? I checked my spam folder and they’re not there either.

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    • theattack

      theattack December 11, 2013, 9:48 am

      Me too! Even ones that I start, which is confusing because I thought you automatically got updates on topics you started? Or maybe not. Either way, the feature is being finicky.

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    • avatar

      painted_lady December 11, 2013, 10:23 am

      I think I must be getting yours. I’m randomly getting forum posts in my email that I don’t even think I read initially. It’s not huge, I’ve been keeping up on some of y’all without having to sift through forums, it’s just unexpected.

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      • CatsMeow

        CatsMeow December 11, 2013, 10:43 am

        haha! Craziness.

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  • avatar

    Amy December 11, 2013, 9:51 am

    I love your lists of favorite things/shopping lists. I usually end up buying one or two things. I live in a little tiny mountain town (nearest Walmart is 50 minutes away – and nearest mall is 2 1/2 hours) – it always makes me feel a little more hip when I get something cool from your lists. 🙂

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    • avatar

      AliceInDairyland December 11, 2013, 10:07 am

      Woah. Mind blown.

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  • avatar

    AliceInDairyland December 11, 2013, 10:15 am

    Even though I didn’t participate (fail) I thought the book club was an AWESOME idea so that should continue to happen. Good way to raise funds for you as well? Is there anything else that can be applied in this general format, that isn’t reading?

    Wendy’s Wine of the Month Club?

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    • avatar

      kerrycontrary December 11, 2013, 10:19 am

      Book club—yes! I forgot about this. I know 1 book a month is a lot to keep up with, so many we could do 1 book a quarter? Or 1 every 2 months? I loved having some direction in what book to read. I’m starting to attend book club meetings through one of my professional associations but they’re all non-fiction and business/finance focused.

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      • avatar

        bethany December 11, 2013, 10:35 am

        I like the idea of a quarterly book club!

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    • avatar

      mertlej December 11, 2013, 10:27 am

      The book club was a lot of fun – since Wendy is so busy and probably can’t always make it through a book, maybe different readers could lead the book club discussions/questions/whatever? Like, we have a submission of book suggestions near the end of the month by readers (for the following month), we all vote and select one, and that reader gets to lead the discussion or questions or topics?

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    • avatar

      csp December 11, 2013, 11:49 am

      She could make lists of the best movies to own and make an amazon list.

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    • avatar

      Amy December 11, 2013, 7:58 pm

      Oooh – Wine of the month club! I love it!!!!

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  • avatar

    Banana December 11, 2013, 10:23 am

    I just wanted to say I really appreciate what you do here, Wendy. This forum has been a life preserver during a pretty awful period at work. Thanks for creating this place and keeping it running and lively! You’re really an inspiration.

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  • avatar

    painted_lady December 11, 2013, 10:31 am

    I love your personal essays, Wendy. They’re so evocative of certain moods and memories, and I LOVE being able to peek into windows of your life. I also like your occasional rants (about judgy moms or having to deal with Jackson’s meltdowns). I like the way they open debates that manage to remain mostly civil, and some things have opened my eyes to how I’m sometimes kind of an asshole (I always look around when I hear a tantrum now to see if I can help, and I wait to gauge the parent BEFORE I roll my eyes – hey, I’m not perfect!). But I also understand how opening yourself up to that kind of debate might suck some.

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    • avatar

      stickelet December 11, 2013, 12:57 pm

      I was scrolling down to say this exact thing. Keep the personal essays coming! Those might be my favorite parts of the site. I also love the Alphabet essays and I know you wanted to save some for a future book, but they are beautiful. Maybe another series? If something strikes you.

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  • Fabelle

    Fabelle December 11, 2013, 10:42 am

    Oh, okay, I thought of something— the bookclub thing reminded me. Maybe a CD swap? Not sure how that would work; there’d have to be a moderator or something that everyone would email with their home address, & then the mod would match people up. The Hairpin did this, & I submitted myself to participate BUUUUUT I never mailed the CD because I suck? I feel like I’d be more up on it for DW though, because I’m more active here.

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    • CatsMeow

      CatsMeow December 11, 2013, 11:07 am

      Oh man, the CD player in my car doesn’t work, and although I’m sure I could listen to them on my DVD player or something, but right now I’m strictly mp3s and vinyl.

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      • theattack

        theattack December 11, 2013, 11:10 am

        Upload onto your computer and then move over onto your mp3 player?

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      • Fabelle

        Fabelle December 11, 2013, 11:25 am

        USB drive swap? haha

        Yeah, my car has a CD player & no mp3 jack for some reason (even though it’s newer than the car I used to have that DID have an mp3 jack 😐 ) so I’m back on CDs.

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      • avatar

        bethany December 11, 2013, 11:37 am

        I just realized that I have no functioning CD player, aside from the one built into my computer at work. Wait- I think my car has one? But I always just use my iphone/ipod in the car.

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      • Fabelle

        Fabelle December 11, 2013, 11:43 am

        Damn everybody & their up-to-date technology!!

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      • avatar

        lets_be_honest December 11, 2013, 11:47 am

        Right?! And here I am trying figure out how to page someone 143.

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      • GatorGirl

        GatorGirl December 11, 2013, 12:02 pm

        My car has this awesome thing that lets me play my iphone and control it through the car, and it displays the song being played. I love it.

        My laptop no longer has a cd drive which is confusing to me. (Since I still sometimes buy CDs and my wedding photos are on a cd)

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      • Fabelle

        Fabelle December 11, 2013, 12:05 pm

        Fucking my 1995 car had that (because my dad installed it) but my car from 2006 that has a digital display of gas mileage, the weather, automatic everything… has a CD player, no mp3 jack (or cassette player to plug an iPod adapter into), & no reasonable way to hook up something like how you describe. Whyyyy

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      • avatar

        bethany December 11, 2013, 12:24 pm

        When we got our car a few years ago the ONLY feature I wanted was an ipod jack!

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      • Fabelle

        Fabelle December 11, 2013, 12:28 pm

        haha the only feature I wanted when I got this car was a sun (moon?) roof, & since it had that— & since my dad was like “eh you can get a broadcaster” (for the iPod? Not sure how that works, & I still haven’t gotten one…)— I was like, “eff the mp3 player jack”

        Also, I hate my iPod. Does anyone else? It doesn’t take any format except mp3. I have a bunch of .wma & .flac files that iTunes just WON’T put on the iPod…

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      • CatsMeow

        CatsMeow December 11, 2013, 12:26 pm

        My car still has a working cassette player, haha. It HAS a CD player, it’s just broken. I’m actually not up-to-date on technology, since I have a Sony Walkman (yes, really) mp3 player that I hook up in my car via one of those cassette connecter thinger-mabobs. I usually just listen to the radio in my car (oldies and NPR because I am 80 apparently), and listen to newer stuff at home on my laptop via Spotify or whatever I download.

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      • CatsMeow

        CatsMeow December 11, 2013, 12:29 pm

        Oh, also my hard drive crashed a while ago, AS WELL AS my external hard drive!!! So I lost my entire music library, which was freaking HUGE, people. HUGE. I’m a big music person.

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      • avatar

        jlyfsh December 11, 2013, 12:32 pm

        i remember when my computer that had all my napster music on it died. i cried. i forget how many songs i had but i mean that was the best mix of music ever. ever.

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      • Fabelle

        Fabelle December 11, 2013, 12:34 pm

        Oh god, noooo, I would fucking die if that happened. I have SO MUCH SHIT, & some of it is rare enough that I’m not sure I’d be able to find it again. And my hard drive has no more room on it, so I’m actually in danger of something bad happening. Ahhh I should’ve let my bf buy me a new hard drive on cyber Monday like he wanted to 🙁 🙁

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      • avatar

        jlyfsh December 11, 2013, 12:35 pm

        get an external one and back up stuff on it! i love my external hard drive at work!

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      • avatar

        bethany December 11, 2013, 1:14 pm

        Yes!! I STILL mourn the loss of all my Napster songs from 1999-2002 or whenever they shut that down. good times.

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      • CatsMeow

        CatsMeow December 11, 2013, 12:28 pm

        Mine doesn’t either!

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      • avatar

        rachel December 11, 2013, 11:55 am

        My car has a cd player, but I finally got a cd to eject from it that was stuck for a month, so I’ve been afraid to try it again.

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      • avatar

        csp December 11, 2013, 11:47 am

        yea, one rainy weekend I copied all my music onto my computer and threw away every cd. it was rather freeing.

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      • avatar

        TheOtherOtherMe December 11, 2013, 12:41 pm

        I hope you back up your computer. It would be a shame to lose ALL that music….

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      • Fabelle

        Fabelle December 11, 2013, 3:20 pm

        The way you phrased this sounds so ominous, haha, like you’re actually hovering over the computer with a stick of dynamite or something (“it’d be a shame if…anything were to HAPPEN…to it. MUAHAHAHA), but anyway, I totally agree. Another reason I have not, & likely would never, go fully digital. What if something happens??

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    • avatar

      rachel December 11, 2013, 11:54 am

      Like an actual physical cd? I mean, if you want mine from years ago, haha. Sharing playlists might be better, or…mp3s through drop box somehow? hmm.

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      • avatar

        bethany December 11, 2013, 12:01 pm

        I feel like that’s probably illegal?

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      • avatar

        rachel December 11, 2013, 12:13 pm

        Hmm. I wonder. I don’t really understand any of that stuff.

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      • Fabelle

        Fabelle December 11, 2013, 12:08 pm

        USB sticks with mp3s stored on them in a playlist? That’s what I was thinking for trading something actually physical, with music (& you can just plug it in to upload)

        I do have dropbox though (would that be illegal? That’s cray-cray. Like, I trade songs over Skype too sometimes; is THAT illegal?)

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      • avatar

        bethany December 11, 2013, 12:24 pm

        I just got dropbox yesterday! Someone trade songs with me! (I’m going to pretend it’s not illegal).

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      • Fabelle

        Fabelle December 11, 2013, 12:33 pm

        I will, I will!

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      • avatar

        jlyfsh December 11, 2013, 12:22 pm

        i like playlists or like everyone shares the first album, cd, tape, whatever they purchased (that you remember!). i think along those lines would be fun. my work internet went down like two weeks ago for basically the whole week and i found all my cds from the late 90s/early 2000s. i forgot how much i loved jimmy eat world!

        also i made my dogs do salt dough paw print ornaments yesterday and i drove for the first time today since last week, yay! and they fucking ate them while i was gone!!! off the stove! how did they get up there? i was so mad, so so mad. i made them do it again. i will win.

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      • Fabelle

        Fabelle December 11, 2013, 12:25 pm

        Yeah, like I want to do the Everything Digital thing, & copy all of my CDs onto the computer, but gahh, there’s so many & likely would result in double or triple songs (sometimes I just downloaded albums of artists of CDs I already owned?) & plus I like going through my old CDs sometimes (like you mentioned). It’s like a hit of nostalgia.

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    • avatar

      sarita_f December 11, 2013, 12:39 pm

      Spotify! I have the pay version because I need to download stuff to play when I’m driving up in the mountains, don’t always have data connection. But I think the free version let’s you create playlists and such? If we’re friends on FB (which I am with many of you) then you can probably “follow” me on FB. I usually do a new playlist every season, although sometimes I get stuck :).

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      • avatar

        jlyfsh December 11, 2013, 12:48 pm

        you can only listen to playlists with the free version from a computer. if you’re using the mobile version you can only listen to radio. but, it’s pretty nice! itunes actually has free radio now as well 🙂

        but, i love spotify from my work computer!

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  • avatar

    Anna December 11, 2013, 12:07 pm

    #1 thing is mobile friendly site for iPhone users. I still lurk here when I have time but it’s usually from my phone because I’m always on the go. And because my home computer is being a majorly slow piece of crap. I don’t know how to fix it. I’ve tried anti-malware software, running my antivirus programs to get rid of spyware and deleting some unnecessary programs to save space on the hard drive. I don’t know what else I can do, except buy a new computer since I’ve been using this one since 2007 anyway.

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  • avatar

    MissDre December 11, 2013, 12:27 pm

    Well, I know I am in the minority here, but I’ve been commenting less and less (even though I still read every single day) because I feel like there has been an increase in train-wreck letters and therefore an increase in negative comments. Everybody else seems to like the train-wreck letters and finds them entertaining. But just my personal opinion, I prefer the more simple honest questions that many people can relate to.

    Other than that, I read DW every day. I still love it here. I love Wendy’s personal letters and comments. I miss the guest columns and His Take. I guess what I’d love to see is more diversity in the type of content. I do like that the majority of people here are friendly and fun. Having DW as part of my day makes me happy!

    Reply Link
  • Dear Wendy

    Wendy December 11, 2013, 12:35 pm

    These are all great suggestions, everyone, thanks! This is what I’m hearing, although I realize there is never 100% agreement:

    1. More iPhone friendly format, especially in regards to forums (!)

    2. Threaded reply feature in the forums (done!)

    3. Fix width of site in Chrome

    4. More diversity in voices (i.e. bring back “His Take” and increase guest essays)

    5. More personal essays from me

    6. Continued “in the news” type posts (at least once a week)

    7. Continueg gift/shopping guides/ monthly favorite lists

    8. Quarterly book club

    These are all doable and I will get to each one as soon as time and resources allow. Thanks again for the suggestions and please keep them coming as you think of them. Let me know if I left something off this list that you think is especially important.

    Reply Link
    • theattack

      theattack December 11, 2013, 12:53 pm

      Omg, Wendy is Santa! Making all of our DW wishes come true!

      What is a threaded forum?

      Reply Link
    • iwannatalktosampson

      iwannatalktosampson December 11, 2013, 1:23 pm

      Hells ya on the personal essays. Those are my favorite.

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    • avatar

      bookie December 11, 2013, 1:23 pm

      I’m getting some crazy formatting in chrome and IE when I enter a thread. Turns it back to plain text with an icon for each person who posts. Just an FYI. think the changes are great!

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      • avatar

        bookie December 11, 2013, 1:37 pm

        It’s only when not logged in, btw.

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      • Dear Wendy

        Wendy December 11, 2013, 1:44 pm

        In the forums or on the main page?

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      • avatar

        MissDre December 11, 2013, 1:54 pm

        I’m getting it in the forums.

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      • Dear Wendy

        Wendy December 11, 2013, 2:04 pm

        Just recently or has this been going on for a while?

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      • avatar

        MissDre December 11, 2013, 3:23 pm

        Just recently.

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      • Dear Wendy

        Wendy December 11, 2013, 3:30 pm

        Are you logged in? And what toe of device are you looking at (tablet, desktop, smart phone)?

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      • Roxy_84

        Roxy_84 December 11, 2013, 3:38 pm

        I am logged in and using a desktop

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      • Roxy_84

        Roxy_84 December 11, 2013, 3:37 pm

        This has been happening to me too, just today after the threading changes in the forum. I changed from chrome to internet explorer and it looks like it works fine in IE, if that helps pinpoint whats up

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      • Dear Wendy

        Wendy December 11, 2013, 4:14 pm

        Thanks.

        Dre, if you clear your cache, do you still have issues in chrome?

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      • avatar

        MissDre December 11, 2013, 4:49 pm

        It works fine if I’m logged in, but reverts to plain text if I’m logged out. And yes I cleared my cache.

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    • avatar

      Christy December 11, 2013, 8:49 pm

      The threaded forum thing is really throwing me – it’s much harder, now, to just go in and read a forum when you’re coming in late. And the threading can get confusing, just because you can’t see how nested you are in the conversation. It feels like the thread can go on forever. I wasn’t a huge fan of the no-reply, 15-posts/page system, but I’m not sure I like this any better.

      I think it’s a lot harder to see the newest replies, because you don’t know if someone responded upthread of where you’re reading. I don’t know if I’m alone in this, though. Maybe no posts/page limit, but without threading?

      I’m really glad you’re willing to make changes so quickly, btw. It’s great knowing how responsive you are. And if I’m alone with not being crazy about the recent forum change, then I’m sure I’ll adjust.

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      • LadyinPurpleNotRed

        LadyinPurpleNotRed December 11, 2013, 8:53 pm

        I’m with you!

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      • avatar

        Christy December 11, 2013, 8:55 pm

        Oh, and can you add back the number of posts at the bottom of the page, in the forum? it’s a small change but I think it would help the change be less disconcerting.

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      • Dear Wendy

        Wendy December 11, 2013, 8:57 pm

        Lets give it a couple days and see how people feel. You may find you get used to it and like better.

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      • GatorGirl

        GatorGirl December 12, 2013, 8:27 am

        Thus far, I’m with Christy. The threading is confusing and difficult to read. And it seems as though the posts aren’t showing up in chronological order, which is even more confusing.

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  • Cassie

    Cassie B. December 11, 2013, 12:42 pm

    Congrats on beginning to see profit from the site!

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    • Dear Wendy

      Wendy December 11, 2013, 12:50 pm

      Thanks! Right now, most of the profit goes toward paying Jackson’s babysitter who watches him a few mornings a week so I can work, but there’s still a little left after that (and after paying site overheard)nand I’m optimistic that within a year I’ll make what would be equivalent to a decent part-time salary (by NYC standards, which is probably equivalent to a full-time salary in some parts of the country).

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      • GatorGirl

        GatorGirl December 11, 2013, 12:57 pm

        That’s so exciting Wendy!!

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      • Northern Mermaid

        Northern Mermaid December 11, 2013, 1:40 pm

        Wendy is awesome! Congrats!

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  • avatar

    applescruffs December 11, 2013, 1:02 pm

    Is there a way to get an update if someone responds to something you posted in one of the letters? Like with the forums, but not ALL the comments to a letter, just on one particular thread?

    Reply Link
  • Addie Pray

    Addie Pray December 11, 2013, 1:24 pm

    Dear Wendy is perfect the way it is – this is a trick question – you guys, why are you giving Wendy ideas of things to *change* – egad!

    I do like seeing more personal stuff though. Still!

    Reply Link
    • mrmidtwenties

      mrmidtwenties December 11, 2013, 2:00 pm

      Change is scary, I don’t like it.

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      • mrmidtwenties

        mrmidtwenties December 11, 2013, 2:07 pm

        Wait a second, I see a lot of calls for more guys here, but what if some of them try to steal Roxy from me? Change is bad! Are you guys trying to destroy our future marriage?

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      • Addie Pray

        Addie Pray December 11, 2013, 3:04 pm

        See, now watch Budj swoop in and steal Roxy. Consider yourself warned!

        Also btw you are Budj 2.0.

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      • Roxy_84

        Roxy_84 December 11, 2013, 3:42 pm

        I would not want to get in the way of the AP-Budj relationship. 1. Because your love made my heart happy 2. because I think AP could get violent

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      • Addie Pray

        Addie Pray December 11, 2013, 4:02 pm

        moi? i’m a pacifist!

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      • Roxy_84

        Roxy_84 December 11, 2013, 3:39 pm

        As if anyone could ever replace you mr mid

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      • Addie Pray

        Addie Pray December 11, 2013, 3:05 pm

        It is so scary. Can you imagine what would happen if one day I go to log into Dear Wendy and the screen is off-white, gray – or worse – striped or something? It would be very difficult to find my bearings, you know?

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      • Roxy_84

        Roxy_84 December 11, 2013, 3:44 pm

        My life would be upside down (this comment is for sidebar domination)

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      • Roxy_84

        Roxy_84 December 11, 2013, 3:44 pm

        Yessssssssss

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  • avatar

    Allie December 11, 2013, 1:27 pm

    I like the site basically as is. The one thing that I miss seeing are the Alphabet Stories… I think it’s been awhile for them. You are good writer Wendy and I liked reading those. So more of that sort of thing maybe on a monthly/bi-monthly basis? If you are saving those things for your e-book, then I understand that too and will wait for its release.
    Otherwise, great job 🙂

    Reply Link
  • Lyra

    Lyra December 11, 2013, 1:31 pm

    The forums are so great! The other day I went back and read some of the old posts. It was kind of like going back and reading old embarrassing journal entries haha.

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    • Lyra

      Lyra December 11, 2013, 2:00 pm

      Oh and sometimes I try the search option and it brings up more recent topics (like within the last 6 months) but not older topics. Not sure why that happens…

      Reply Link
  • something random

    something random December 11, 2013, 1:46 pm

    I don’t have a lot of spare time today so forgive me if someone has already suggested this but I would prefer a search option in the archives that sorts by key phrases or possibly having advice columns organized by themselves with more specific categories (abuse, affairs, alcohol, alone, animals, anger, anxiety, apologies, attraction, babies, bed, bi-polar, bisexexuality, body issues, boredom, brides, brunch) you get the idea.

    Reply Link
    • Dear Wendy

      Wendy December 11, 2013, 2:15 pm

      Ah, yes. Good point. Will add to the to-do list: “Easier Search Function” (by chronological order, categories, and tags)

      Reply Link
  • Paki

    Paki December 11, 2013, 1:56 pm

    A way to remind when I am on Amazon to come back here and click Wendy’s link to shop there!

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  • avatar

    lets_be_honest December 11, 2013, 2:22 pm

    Wendy, ever hear of ebates? You should see if you can get a link on here for that. Check this out…
    http://www.ebates.com/bloggers.htm

    Reply Link
  • avatar

    jlyfsh December 11, 2013, 4:46 pm

    i just got the most awesome birthday gifts in the mail! it’s this but in travel mug form. i think everyone needs one! 🙂

    Reply Link
    • avatar

      lets_be_honest December 11, 2013, 4:56 pm

      AWESOME

      Reply Link
  • kaluu

    kaluu December 15, 2013, 4:55 pm

    What happened to the featured homes? That was fun! I click through the recomended products even if I don’t buy any (yet)
    I don’t really make cocktails but I’d look at other recipes if wendy posts some

    Reply Link

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