I was hoping to answer this myself, but I’m on day four of an awful cold and haven’t had the energy or mental acuity to give this the attention I wanted to give, so I’m making it a Your Turn, and, if I feel better later today, I’ll give my response in the comments.
I didn’t realize how awful I was at it until I moved out of state, switched high schools, and had to make all new friends. I have tried so hard; I’ve made a few friends but no one that would actually want to hang out with me after school. I always thought it was my weight, but then I lost 45 lbs. and still no one liked me. Then I thought it was my curly hair, so I tried straightening it and still no one liked me. I’m very shy and reserved sometimes — I try not to be but it’s very hard socializing with people. I can’t keep up conversation, I always feel like people don’t remember who I am even though I remember who they are, so I just never say anything when I see them. I’ve had a few crushes on guys, but they all ended poorly. Well, they didn’t go anywhere, so they couldn’t have actually ended poorly if they never even began. There was one guy I liked and I told him. He said: “I don’t like you back,” which stung. I questioned my appearance for weeks. I even got drunk and sobbed about it. There was another guy I swapped phone numbers with, and then I texted and he never replied. There was another guy who flirted with me, and then he said, “I have to get my girlfriend a gift…”
I’ve been bummed and I don’t know what to do. I know I’m young and probably shouldn’t be worrying too much about guys, but it’s hard when every other girl in high school is dating and hanging out/making friends except you. You start to question what it is about you that is so unlikeable. – Sad, Lonely Girl
If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at firstname.lastname@example.org.