Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

25 Most Popular Forum Discussions of 2013

Speech bubblesAs 2013 winds to a close, I’m taking a look at the year that was on Dear Wendy. Last week, I posted the 30 most popular columns of the year. Today, I’ve got the 25 most popular forum discussions — some of which kept you chatting throughout the year. In 2013, we had roughly 1,800 new forum topics and nearly 55,000 replies. That’s a lot of chit-chat. Here are the 25 threads that had the created the most drama, intrigue, laughs, tears, and inside jokes.

1. Couch to 5K
Everyone likes to get fit in the new year.

2. Finances and Relationships
How do you deal with money in YOUR relationship?

3. Why won’t my alma mater stay out of the news?
Is throwing an “Asian” themed party racist or not? Discuss (and you did…).

4. The Relentless Pope Coverage Makes Me Wanna Barf!
BGM is not a fan.

5. Need to vent about fake patronizing assholes
Sometimes a woman just gotsta vent about an ex.

6. Biggest Loser – THIS IS SSSSERIOUS
For real, in 2014, I am losing ten pounds!!

7. What words or phrases get on your nerves?

8. Bitching session

9. Can we talk about Spring in hot pockets again?
It’s not really about hot pockets.

10. Things No One Will Tell Fat Girls…
Let’s all learn to love ourselves, butt dimples be damned.

11. DW After Hours
It’s getting’ hot in here.

12. Weird celebrity crushes
Mine is Jason Schwartzman.

13. Bedroom Issues!
The classic “Asking for a friend…”

14. Ruminating on Feminisim
Pass the wine.

15. Story of my life imploding
Putting the M and the O and the A in the MOA.

16. Lemme tell ya about my bad date

17. Share Your Tattoos!
I don’t have any.

18. Is this inappropriate?
To send condoms to a relative in college or not?

19. Is it rude to not give gift for a destination wedding?
Of COURSE there’s a wedding thread.

20. Help me chill the fuck out about dating again
Start by not reading the bad date thread…

21. Wedding rant
Oh look, another wedding one.

22. “Take Care” – AP’s ex
What an asshole.

23. Biggest Loser Part Deux
Because the first one wasn’t enough.

24. I hate dating
There were actually two threads this year by the same name, but this is the most recent. Together, they had like 800 comments.

25. Adult culture and alcohol
This thread was started by someone who is married and doesn’t have to go on first dates anymore.

37 comments… add one
  • TECH December 30, 2013, 11:08 am

    Ok, I didn’t know where to put this, but is anyone else aggravated by stuff like this?
    Any time I asked my friend about something HE did, he always responds “WE did.” As in, he and his girlfriend.
    I’ll say “Oh, did you have a nice weekend?” He’ll say “We did.”
    So all of a sudden he’s not an autonomous person anymore. He does nothing independently. I can’t ask him anything about himself anymore. Just “we”.

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      mrmidtwenties December 30, 2013, 11:12 am

      bahaha, I don’t get aggravated, I do get amused by it though

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      Fabelle December 30, 2013, 11:15 am

      This annoys me, too. Like, if I’m going to say “we”, I always introduce my S/O to the conversation first (i.e. “How was your weekend, what’d you do?” / “Oh, I had a good weekend… Fabello & I went to _______ & did ________, we had a good time.” In other words, it’s never just WE, we, we)

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    • Banana December 30, 2013, 11:24 am

      Yeah, I’m of two minds on stuff like this. I agree it’s really annoying when people talk about themselves as a unit, instead of as individuals. If the question is just “How was your weekend,” like Fabelle said, answer the question as an individual first, even if it segues into “I did this, then my boyfriend and I did this together, then I did this…”

      But on the other hand, I have some friends who are OVER sensitive to that kind of thing. I was talking to a mutual friend about it once, and we realized that around one friend we have, we actually feel afraid to mention our bfs in conversation. So if she asked us how our weekends were, we’d say something like, “Oh, I did this…[then leave out what I did with bf]…and then this…” and that’s kind of lame because we (my other friend and I) shouldn’t have to feel like we have to speak as if our boyfriends don’t exist just to appease our prickly friend.

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    • applescruffs December 30, 2013, 1:21 pm

      I agree 100%.

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      Lyra December 30, 2013, 1:22 pm

      Yes, I get annoyed by that too. I also get annoyed when people assume their SO’s are invited to everything. My friend who is married brings her husband to EVERY friend event and it’s kind of obnoxious. I don’t really like him because he’s treated her like crap in the past. Yet he’s ALWAYS at our friend events and sometimes we just don’t want him there…

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      • shanshantastic December 30, 2013, 2:25 pm

        That’s so presumptious. You have to wonder if he takes her to all of HIS friend events as well, awkward… But in my world our friends are like “his, hers and ours” so there’s very little overlap.

      • bethany December 30, 2013, 2:27 pm

        I can’t stand when people automatically assume their spouse/significant other is always invited to stuff, too.

        Luckily my close friends all sort of have the same attitude about that, and the guys aren’t invited unless we specifically say something about it. Plus, Dave wouldn’t want to come hang out with us anyway, we’re kind of obnoxious when we’re all together!

        We do have “couple friends”, where we always hang out as a group, and that’s fine. But sometimes it’s nice to just have some girl time.

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        Lyra December 30, 2013, 3:34 pm

        Exactly. We can get obnoxious too, and girl time is the best! The thing is when she hangs out with us without him, he makes her feel bad that she didn’t spend time with HIM. Not to mention they only have one car…but he could drop her off and go somewhere else while she’s with us, you know? Here’s the kicker though: he owns a motorcycle, yet she doesn’t have a car… (I’m not a fan of the husband if you can’t tell haha)

      • applescruffs December 30, 2013, 5:05 pm

        My stepdad assumes he’s invited to mother/daughter things. He’s a good guy, but sometimes a girl needs time alone with her mom! Although my mom does need to tell him when he’s not invited.

      • Breezy AM January 7, 2014, 2:24 am

        Not to get all GG on you, but seriously? By definition they are. If my spouse was not welcome to attend somewhere, I would not go. Note that does not mean I don’t do things separate from him! We do, often! But if he is specifically NOT WELCOME… than I am not interested in being there (exceptions for things like GIRLS NIGHT etc).

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    Fabelle December 30, 2013, 11:14 am

    hahaha @ Wendy’s taglines (taglines?), especially for #14, #13, & #9

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      Classic December 30, 2013, 11:21 am

      I like how she said my name in the tagline for #13.

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    mrmidtwenties December 30, 2013, 11:23 am

    Guys I just reread how Roxy and I’s wedding hijacked the tattoo thread. We’re all hilarious.

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      Roxy_84 December 30, 2013, 12:30 pm

      Oh yeah! The wedding is all planned, now we can refer back to it and just go off that. Genius.

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        mrmidtwenties December 30, 2013, 1:44 pm

        People are going to be farting and burping glitter all over the place, also, tattoo pic is a reminder that I have to get my back jacked again

  • bethany December 30, 2013, 11:27 am

    Yay! One of mine made it! (#18)

    I never did end up sending her condoms. Mostly because I was too lazy to send any care packages other than a Birchbox. BUT- spring semester I’m going to do a better job on the care packages, and I am totally sending them.

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    Lyra December 30, 2013, 11:27 am

    That was a fun walk down memory lane.

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    Addie Pray December 30, 2013, 11:34 am

    Hi from Rio! It’s hot as balls here. I am wearing SPF 100 and I still burn just crossing the parking lot. And I have olive skin so that means it’s HOT AS BALLS here. Also the Brazilian butt is not just a myth guys. Their butts are so beautiful here I find myself staring at the ladies!

    Also my ex was an asshole. He sent me a mean and cold email which really helped speed the healing along.

    When I get back from South America the diet is on like donkey kong.

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      Fabelle December 30, 2013, 11:41 am

      Are you meeting up with Rainbow?? (or is my geography wrong)

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        CatsMeow December 30, 2013, 12:01 pm

        Since I’m APv2.0, I can answer for her. I think she said she’s meeting up with JK when she goes to Buenos Aires!

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        Fabelle December 30, 2013, 2:11 pm

        Oooh yeah, I forgot JK was in Argentina also!!

        Have fun, AP!

    • Taylor December 31, 2013, 5:02 pm


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    CatsMeow December 30, 2013, 12:00 pm

    Aww, mine was DW After Hours. I didn’t have enough time in the day for DWing when school started, and I missed everyone terribly!

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    veritek33 December 30, 2013, 12:31 pm

    Should I be proud or ashamed that 3 of my forums made the list? Oy 😉

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      Lyra December 30, 2013, 12:37 pm

      Proud. Own it, girl. 😉

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    • Sansa December 30, 2013, 12:46 pm

      Oh heck no! I shall call you popular 🙂

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  • rachel December 30, 2013, 1:06 pm

    Are people still on vacation? I’m sad to be at work today.

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    • rachel December 30, 2013, 1:58 pm

      AH, I just looked at the university website, and tomorrow is a holiday too!!

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  • Kate December 30, 2013, 1:22 pm

    So, regarding the destination wedding one. NOT to open a can of wedding-related worms, but I just got back from my own destination wedding, and here are my comments… I personally did not have any expectations for gifts. People had to spend a lot of money to fly there and even though it was all-inclusive with a very good rate, it was still not cheap to stay a few nights at the resort. We didn’t register anywhere and didn’t say anything about gifts.

    So, we got a few very generous gifts ($500 from best man, $100 from the best man’s MOM, $400 from my aunt, and the most awesome thing was my hairdresser, who owns her own salon on Newbury in Boston DID MY FULL FOIL HIGHLIGHTS AND CUT FOR FREE!). And some other people did amazing services for us. One friend who’s a photographer took our photos, another did the invitations, a third did the playlist for the DJ, a fourth actually MARRIED us, all gratis). We did get a few envelopes at the reception with relatively modest amounts of cash (these are younger people with limited funds and the fact that they gave anything was very generous). A few people bought expensive bottles of alcohol too (outside the all-inclusive plan).

    Other than that, really not much. Nothing from my parents yet or from the majority of the guests. But again, that’s totally fine and I have no expectations whatsoever. I am overwhelmed with happiness and gratitude for all the people who made the trip and were there to support us. Including a woman who just finished a round of chemo. Unbelievable. Just all the love. I am not an emotional person, but Jesus.

    Bottom line, gifts are not necessary. Your presence is a huge deal.

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    • Kate December 30, 2013, 1:30 pm

      Oh, and my MOH, who is a commenter on DW, did my makeup! If you’re a wedding guest who can offer any kind of service, even if it’s something like doing social intervention to keep certain people from getting out of control, it’s SUPER appreciated and you should always offer if it’s something you’re willing to do.

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      • rachel December 30, 2013, 1:33 pm

        Whattt?? Who was your MOH?

      • Kate December 30, 2013, 1:38 pm

        Someone who frequently likes Wendy’s FB posts, wore a blue dress, and looked gorge! 😉

      • shanshantastic December 30, 2013, 2:31 pm

        That’s all so fantastic, and congratulations!

        I am my best friend’s MOH, and she was mine. Part of my gift to her is going to be her floral arrangements (I did my own bouquets, corsages & boutonnieres and she loved them), centerpieces, and general planning help. I also have a super secret surprise that will fit with her theme and I’m SO EXCITED to do it for her.

      • Kate December 30, 2013, 2:36 pm

        Shan, that is awesome! All those wedding services cost SO MUCH, it’s insane. I was ecstatic about anything and everything that people could do for us. Doing flowers for your friend is worth hundreds if not thousands of dollars!

  • applescruffs December 30, 2013, 1:23 pm

    I just had 3 no shows in a row! I told my patients that I was going to be here this week and last but they were under no obligation. It’s funny, I’m in a period where my patients are cancelling left and right and my coworker across the hall is in the opposite. Soon we’ll switch and ALL of mine will come and none of his. I wish they would coordinate better.

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    iwannatalktosampson December 30, 2013, 7:22 pm

    Oh God I really want to re-read my forum, but also don’t even a little bit.

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