Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Comments of the Week

This site wouldn’t be what it is without the active participation of all of you. Your insightful, funny, smart comments add different perspectives and valuable advice that I’m sure goes a long way in helping others sort through the issues in their own relationships. After the jump, some of the more memorable comments of the week (maybe you’ll even see your own!).


Amy in His Take: “Why Won’t He Label Our Relationship?”: “[Why are] women so often willing to give in to things that they probably aren’t really OK with? […] It turns your basic expectation of exclusivity into a “win” rather than just a standard that you expect to be met. I’ve done this before too and I’ve seen my friends do it as well – I have NEVER seen it end well – I lowered my standards of expectation with my exhusband significantly and finally became miserable enough that I was able to realize that he wasn’t worth the hassle and heartache. In the future I will not lessen these basic standards that I have in place – as they represent my needs in a relationship. We’d be so much better off if we expected others to treat us as good as we expect ourselves to treat others – and if we didn’t settle for less.”

Lexington in His Take: “Why Won’t He Label Our Relationship?”: “Don’t be with someone who isn’t proud to be with you. Finis.”
HmC in His Take: “Why Won’t He Label Our Relationship?”: “Having needs is not the same thing as being needy!”
Jess in “My Boyfriend’s Brother Died. How Can I Be Supportive?”: “The preacher at my friends funeral described grief this way: In the beginning the grief is the center of your universe, and everything else revolves around it. With time, the grief is just a planet in orbit… one of the things in your life that will *never* go away and will always be there, but not always the center of everything. Right now, the grief is the number one thing in your boyfriends life. I’m afraid that will only change with time…”
SpaceySteph in “Should I Stay With My Boyfriend or Move Back Home?”: “[…]As an aside, I had to move 1400 miles away from home for my dream job- it would be a 20 hour drive from my house to my parents’ house, and its about a 3 hour flight. I left a boyfriend (we did long distance for awhile but it didn’t work out), my best friend, and my awesome family behind. It bums me out a little that grandma and grandpa won’t be right down the road when I have kids, the way my grandparents were when I was growing up… but I did what I had to do. I talk to my mom about once a week. They come visit me about twice a year, and I visit home about twice a year too. In the time of Skype and Southwest Airlines, the people you love are never really that far away.”
WatersEdge in 15 Signs He Really Loves You: “I was in an LDR, and I knew my now-husband was really serious about me when he asked me for all my toiletry item preferences to stock up the house before my first weekend visit. I knew he REALLY loved me when I saw that he bought economy-sized everything. It takes a lot of weekend visits to get through 6 bars of Dove soap!”

spaceboy761 in “How Do You End a Relationship?” How Do You End a Relationship?: “I usually fake my own death, move to a new town, and start over with a fake identity. I’ve done it four times so far and it gets pretty easy once you know the drill.”
spaceboy761 in Your Turn: “How Can I Get Over my First Broken Heart?”: “Here’s a little advice from the overprotective male perspective:

Whenever you decide to get back into the dating pool, do NOT publicize the fact that you’re just getting over your first major breakup. This will have the dual effect of driving away the guys that actually care about you and attracting the predatorial doucheholes that circle around emotionally wounded women a la sharks vis a vis baby seals. When the topic comes up on the early dates, just be cool about it. If you’re still too hurt to be cool about it, then you’re not ready to date yet.”

7 comments… add one
  • MissDre April 8, 2011, 3:10 pm

    Yay spaceboy761!!!

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  • SpaceySteph April 8, 2011, 3:23 pm

    Oh boy, my first Comment of the week! I’d like to thank the academy…

    Although my vote would be for that HmC quote. So right!

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  • HmC April 8, 2011, 4:19 pm

    Hurray! Thanks Wendy.

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  • Amy April 8, 2011, 4:27 pm

    Thanks! 🙂

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  • WatersEdge April 8, 2011, 4:40 pm

    I love reading these because even if I’ve just mostly skimmed the site, like I did this week, I remember all these quotes. They really are memorable and awesome!

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  • spaceboy761 April 8, 2011, 7:57 pm

    It’s no joke! I used to be spaceboy757…. 🙁

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  • Buglet April 19, 2011, 4:26 pm

    Link on how to end a relationship doesn’t work 🙂

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