Dear Miles: “Should I Buy Pricey Sunglasses?”
Today is my birthday (35, y’all!) so I’m taking the day off to celebrate, enjoy a little R&R and squeeze in a sonogram appointment at my OB’s office. In my absence, Miles, who is handling his new diabetic diet like a champ, by the way, has offered to guest write a few columns. Here’s one of them:
Dear Miles,
Should I buy those sunglasses at Sunglass Hut? They look real cute on me but they’re pricey. Stephanie says I should go ahead and buy them. Ryan is always telling me not to hang out with Stephanie because she’s irresponsible and immature. I’m tired of Ryan always bossing me around. But the sunglasses cost $900. I’m gonna buy them. — Angie
Should I buy those sunglasses at Sunglass Hut? They look real cute on me but they’re pricey. Stephanie says I should go ahead and buy them. Ryan is always telling me not to hang out with Stephanie because she’s irresponsible and immature. I’m tired of Ryan always bossing me around. But the sunglasses cost $900. I’m gonna buy them. — Angie
Dear Angie,
I am feeling good. I woke up at the crack of dawn and then took a 5-hour nap. I had that dream where I work in a delicatessen, everyone is my friend and they have a sandwich named after me (“The Miles”).
Sometimes I wonder what a pannini tastes like. I heard the man say that they’re not so good. But I’d like to find out for myself.
Miles, have you ever had a sandwich? Imagine your wet catfood between two layers of dry catfood, then pressed under an iron on both sides. That’s what a panini is like.
Dear Angie,
I’d just steal them and hide them under the couch.
Signed, Link the ferret,
Dear Miles,
Sometimes my Daddy makes a sammich, but he leaves it on the table. Sometimes I like to go where his sammich is and take a nibble. Usually they are good. Also, I drink from his cup of water when he’s not looking. He gets upset and throws it out but he should be honored. I’m a tuxedo cat.
Love,
Melaina
Melaina,
I am also a tuxedo cat! We are superior to all others. My Person also gets upset when I drink out of her glasses, especially the round ones on the stems. The stuff she puts in those glasses always smells more interesting than anything else, but she refuses to share.
Sincerely,
Shakespeare
Miles….those shoes cost $300……let’s get’m.
I wish I could hit the green thumb on your comment at least six more times
Oh my god, shoes.
Dear Miles,
The panini is good. The man is just lying to you so that he can have it all for himself. Steal it off the table before he sits down, you deserve it.
Best regards,
Charlie
Gatto, the Italian cat here. The best panino is prosciutto, which is also the best ham. And the best fish are anchovies. In Rome, there are many cats and people bring us food. I see a bird!
Eh…not into the Miles columns….
It’s called humor….
Miles is the cat’s MEOW. He totally helped me with my dilemma regarding my cat Hocus Pocus. Don’t make Miles rally against humankind now – we’d totally lose!
NINE HUNDRED DOLLARS FOR FRIGGING SUNGLASSES! Please tell us your kidding…or really, really rich. ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FREAKING MIND!
ninehundreddollarsunglasses, ninehundreddollarsunglasses,ninehundreddollarsunglasses,
(muttering to no one in particular)
*sigh* You and me both, Eddie. I can think of better things to spend $900 on. So many books… a new windshield for my suburban maybe. Carpet for my living room, staircase, and upstairs hallway; plus new paint for the entire downstairs of my house AND new flooring for my dining room and kitchen.
A bigger freezer. A bigger shed. A new greenhouse and upgrades to my current garden set-up. A complete winterization/tune-up for my suburban and detailing.
See – I can think of LOTS of things to spend $900 on, and all better and much more worthy than a pair of freaking sunglasses.
Which will probably get sat on the first time they aren’t put back in the case…
*laugh* I wonder if those glasses come with a complimentary case, or if you have to pay extra?