Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Friday Links


Heidi Younger for The New York Times

Here are a few things from around the web that may interest you:

When Weddings Ruin Friendships

Towson University police warn of a woman on the loose, looking for a date for her son.

When Your Shared Netflix Account Outlasts The Relationship

I Had a Late-Term Abortion. Trump and Pro-Lifers Have No Right to Call Me a Murderer. (What it’s like to have the most devastating event of your life become a misrepresented political talking point.)

The Real Mommy War Is Against the State. Stop blaming yourselves. Blame the total lack of social supports.

Interesting:

Many women want monogamy. It’s a cozy arrangement, and one our culture endorses, to put it mildly. But wanting monogamy isn’t the same as feeling desire in a long-term monogamous partnership. The psychiatrist and sexual-health practitioner Elisabeth Gordon told me that in her clinical experience, as in the data, women disproportionately present with lower sexual desire than their male partners of a year or more, and in the longer term as well. “The complaint has historically been attributed to a lower baseline libido for women, but that explanation conveniently ignores that women regularly start relationships equally as excited for sex.” Women in long-term, committed heterosexual partnerships might think they’ve “gone off” sex—but it’s more that they’ve gone off the same sex with the same person over and over.

— The Bored Sex

Americans Lost $143 Million In Online Relationship Scams Last Year

The Cities With the Most Singles

How Lorena Bobbitt Reclaimed Her Place In History: The inside story of how she went from punchline to the subject of a serious Amazon documentary.

Thank you to those who submitted links for me to include. If you see something around the web you think DW readers would appreciate, please send me a link to [email protected] and, if it’s a fit, I’ll include it in Friday’s round-up. Thanks!

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6 comments… add one
  • Copa

    Copa February 15, 2019, 11:38 am

    The article about weddings ruining friendships was interesting to me. I’ve never dealt with a bridezilla friend or had a friendship ruined by a wedding, nor do I foresee this happening to me, but did recently experience the first time I ever felt truly slighted by a friend as she plans her wedding. I feel really silly for having these feelings in the first place — I know she’s not wedding planning AT me — and I was surprised to feel this way.

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  • bittergaymark

    Bittergaymark February 15, 2019, 12:00 pm

    That wedding article is interesting in that damn near all of the friends “victimized” by the brides curiously seem to have actually done the victimizing. The first one — Miss Mollello (spelling) especially. WHAT A DRAMA QUEEN / BRAT.

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    • Skyblossom

      Skyblossom February 15, 2019, 12:20 pm

      I didn’t get it at all. Why not be the maid of honor? Why think that you know better than her who she should have in her wedding. I could see her friend having a friend as maid of honor so that she didn’t have to pick between her sisters.

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    csp February 15, 2019, 12:28 pm

    I think the online scamming is just so sad. I just think there are all these people out there just wanting love and attention.

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  • TaraMonster

    TaraMonster February 15, 2019, 1:25 pm

    That wedding article was interesting, if unsurprising. I did lose one friend shortly after her wedding, but it wasn’t a big falling out or anything-we just slowly stopped talking. I wouldn’t say I blame the wedding directly, but certainly situations pertaining to her wedding made it increasingly clear that she wasn’t a particularly good friend to begin with.

    Just completely anecdotally, I found that the weddings of my friends who got married earlier in life were drama-filled (like the one I mentioned above) while the ones I’ve been a part of in more recent years had no trace of that whatsoever.

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    • avatar

      csp February 15, 2019, 1:38 pm

      I totally agree with this! I got married very young. People cared a lot if they were a bridesmaid. I also had never planned an event or learned to really negotiate with people like my inlaws. I will say that looking back, I shake my head at some of the things that we got upset about.

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