Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Friday Links

I continue to be heartbroken over the thousands of children the Trump administration has kidnapped from their families with zero plan to reunite them. Many of these migrant children have now been shipped off around the country, housed in shelters and now some with foster families, with no paper trail to track them. Meanwhile, their parents are detained at or near the border or have been deported and many have no idea where their children are or when or even whether they will ever see them again. I am heartened that so many of you and my friends and fellow Americans and people all over the world share my outrage, and I hope and pray that this outrage fuels a desperately-needed change in direction and leadership in the U.S. November cannot come soon enough.

A few related articles:

Trump Retreats on Separating Families, but Thousands May Remain Apart

Immigration experts say there is no system in place to bring separated families back together.

“The shift leader came over very aggressively and told me, ‘Tell them they can’t hug each other!’ And I at that point told her, ‘No. As a human being, I can’t do that.'” — Antar Davidson was told to separate tearful Brazilian siblings and stop them from hugging, so he resigned in protest.

Beata Mariana de Jesus Mejia-Mejia says she and her son came to the United States seeking asylum, fleeing death threats and domestic violence from her husband in Guatemala. They crossed the border May 19 near San Luis, Arizona, and were immediately approached by Border Patrol agents and taken into custody. Mejia told CNN this week that she’d been trying to learn her son’s whereabouts for weeks. But no one had given her a clear answer.”It’s not fair for a mother,” she said. “It’s like they’re putting a knife in your chest and killing you.”

— She got her son back after suing the Trump administration.

Melania Trump’s excursion in her “I Really Don’t Care” jacket did not send a hidden message. It was there for all to see.

There are currently over 239 migrant children being kept, thousands of miles from their parents, at a center here in NYC. As of yesterday morning, a councilman from the district was accepting donations of diapers and clothes and toys at his office to deliver to the shelter, and I had planned to do a short fundraiser on Dear Wendy, like I did after Hurricane Sandy, and use all the donations to buy supplies to deliver to the councilman’s office. However, by late afternoon, he announced that the office was so inundated with donations they couldn’t accept anymore (which is at least a little bit heartening). People are desperate to help, to do something. Here are some ways you can do just that:

Donate to one of the many fantastic organizations working to support the families affected: The Florence Project is a an Arizona organization that offers free legal services to families in immigration custody; RAICES is a nonprofit in Texas that is paying the bond for parents currently being held in detention and is providing legal services for parents and their children; Young Center for Immigrant Children’s Rights, champions the rights of unaccompanied immigrant children; and ActBlue, divides your contribution evenly between 14 organizations working to support the families affected.

Protest. Together, a number of organizations are organizing protests in Washington, D.C., and around the country on Saturday, June 30th. On Thursday, June 28th, the organizers of the Women’s March are holding a protest in Washington, D.C.

Call your congresspeople. If you don’t know whose you are, go to this great website. Enter your zip code and you’ll be given the appropriate names and numbers to call. Tell them that you want them to publicly demand a plan be immediately formulated and implemented to reunite the children and parents who have been separated, and that children shouldn’t be detained indefinitely. (Here’s a script you can follow).

And while it seems hard to believe, there has also been unrelated stories published this week:

Turning a Breakup Into a Positive Experience

In their podcast, the Sugars (Cheryl Strayed and Steve Almond) tackle a similar question to this one that I answered last week.

This political ad from a mother in Texas running for Congress is amazing

Thank you to those who submitted links for me to include. If you see something around the web you think DW readers would appreciate, please send me a link to [email protected] and, if it’s a fit, I’ll include it in Friday’s round-up. Thanks!

Follow along on Facebook, and Instagram.

38 comments… add one
  • avatar

    bondgirl June 22, 2018, 9:29 am

    Melania wearing that “I really don’t care” jacket has got to be one of the most tone deaf actions I’ve ever seen. Like, really??? Beyond moronic.

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      anonymousse June 22, 2018, 12:19 pm

      It wasn’t tone deaf. It was a deliberate choice with an explicit message to the American people.

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        Kate June 22, 2018, 12:23 pm

        Agree. She knows exactly what she wants to communicate when she puts on an outfit. That was a message. I don’t think she was saying she doesn’t care about kids, but I think it was a message to the media and Americans in some way.

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        anonymousse June 22, 2018, 12:26 pm

        I do think she doesn’t care about children with darker skin. The way the right talks about these kids, infants even, it’s sickening. I didn’t know I was still capable of feeling shock at the depths of their hatred and depravity.

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    • Dear Wendy

      Dear Wendy June 22, 2018, 1:38 pm

      Yeah, I think her husband was correct saying that the jacket was a message to the media (and, to an extent, the American public). She knows as she is walking onto a plane to go anywhere, the media (and the American public) will be dissecting her wardrobe choice (just like with any any and every First Lady before her), and her jacket was a direct message to them and us. There was no message to the kids because she’s indifferent to them. She wouldn’t actively try to hurt them and I’m sure she doesn’t take joy in seeing them separated from their families like so many of her husband’s supporters do, but it’s not like she has anything invested, emotionally or otherwise, in their getting reunited with their families.

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        SpaceySteph June 22, 2018, 1:47 pm

        I think you’re right. She wasn’t sending a message to the kids because she didn’t think about the kids enough to make a statement to them (and apparently took it off before going to see them…. and how many of them read English anyways?). It WAS a message though. Its not coincidence that after her last trip to Texas where everyone focused on her shoes, her next trip to Texas was bearing that message.

        What I really want to know is why a clothing store makes such a ridiculous jacket? What’s the message they’re trying to send? And how did Melania come to own such a cheap piece of crap?

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      • avatar

        anonymousse June 22, 2018, 7:27 pm

        I don’t think she’s was trying to send a message to the kids, otherwise she would have worn the message on her shirt, she would have has it screenprinted on balloons. She’s telling us and the world at large that she doesn’t care about this travesty, or any other her husband and family are responsible for.

        There’s one thing they all care about…$$$

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  • avatar

    CanadaGoose June 22, 2018, 11:19 am

    As a Canadian, I am really torn about what I can do to express my outrage. It’s absolutely sickening what is happening in the US. I don’t understand how he gets away with it – and I mean that I actually do not how the US system works enough to understand how someone so clearly unfit can stay in office. Here, a non-confidence vote in the House and out he’d go (that’s a bit simplistic but it can and has been done).

    Trump’s actions will absolutely result in deaths and I am truly amazed someone hasn’t taken extreme steps to remove him from office. For the first year, I refused to go to the States, but that just hurts the sane people who run tourism-focused businesses. I came so close to cancelling Xmas in Hawaii over this border policy but Hawaii’s government is asking tourists to come because they need the money and the volcano is scaring people away. What to do?

    Also, what the fuck is the deal with the gun-loving? I so do not get that. I remember being in Arkansas a few years ago and heard some guy on TV asking for gun control and telling people not to worry, he wasn’t talking about taking granny’s purse gun away. !?!

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    • avatar

      CanadaGoose June 22, 2018, 11:20 am

      Ack, typos! Is there a way to edit comments?

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    • avatar

      anonymousse June 22, 2018, 12:23 pm

      The problem with removing Trump, is Mike Pence.

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      • avatar

        keyblade June 22, 2018, 1:05 pm

        Pence can’t hide anymore. Not under the issue of abortion. He is doing the world a favor by displaying how charlatans look and how easy it is for the people’s worst instincts to take over when personal ambition and religiosity are tied together.

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      • avatar

        anonymousse June 22, 2018, 1:38 pm

        Not sure how that correlates to him being next in line for the presidency.

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    • Lucidity

      Lucidity June 22, 2018, 9:07 pm

      What you can do is write to your MP and demand that parliament repeal the Safe Third Country Agreement so that Canada isn’t forced to deport refugees who make it up to our border simply because they set foot on US soil before ours. This would also mean immigrants currently in the US who fear deportation could apply for refugee status here. You can also attend one of the protests being organized here to pressure the Canadian government to repeal the STCA and to put pressure on Trump to reunite families.

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  • bittergaymark

    Bittergaymark June 22, 2018, 12:32 pm

    Melania and Ivanka are both now proven vile horrific monsters who are deserving to be forever tied to Forrest Trump. May they all burn together in hell soon enough. The Trumps are monsters. They should forever be spit on wherever they go. And that’s just for a start…

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      Kate June 22, 2018, 12:43 pm

      Lol I told Ivanka to burn in hell on her Instagram. She’s a hideous vile monster. They’re all cruel and sick and fake humans.

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        Kate June 22, 2018, 2:30 pm

        And like not to body shame you, ivanka, but please spend some of your $82 million or whatever you make a year on some bras and profesh tops that don’t put your nipples on display. Do what you want on the weekends, but nipples don’t belong at work.

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      • avatar

        ron June 22, 2018, 3:35 pm

        Kate —
        That’s not body shaming, that’s fashion shaming and particularly appropriate for a young woman trying to build her own fashion empire, based upon her father’s celebrity/power and her husband’s $.

        American presidents have had fame/celebrity for over a century, but only the Clintons and Trumps have so obviously been willing to step over the line to monetize it. They are all bribe magnets.

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      • avatar

        Kate June 22, 2018, 3:41 pm

        Grifters and whores.

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    • bittergaymark

      Bittergaymark June 23, 2018, 3:07 am

      Eh… her nips are proudly on display so daddy can slurp away on them like a l’il piggie…

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  • avatar

    Vathena June 22, 2018, 12:40 pm

    There was a protest outside Kirstjen Nielsen’s house early this morning! I’d been reluctant to do anything involving shouting, on account of my other nice, normal neighbors, but man it was a salve on my soul to look out the window and hear the shouts of “Free the kids!” and “No Justice, No Sleep!” Once they’d moved away from her place and were right across from my house, I went out on the deck and gave them a hearty “WOOOO!” Some other neighbors and I have a few quieter things we’ll do with the kids this weekend, if the weather cooperates. And assuming she doesn’t resign today…

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  • avatar

    memboard June 22, 2018, 2:09 pm

    Maybe she’s saying the doesn’t care about helping her cheating, lying, eventually ex-husband?

    Still as a figure head of the country, that wasn’t the way to do it.

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    • avatar

      Kate June 22, 2018, 2:25 pm

      I doubt it. She’s sitting pretty. She could erase herself from this narrative any time, but she hasn’t. She won’t.

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    • Lucidity

      Lucidity June 22, 2018, 8:20 pm

      I wondered if it was message for Trump, too. Like maybe he told her not to go visit the kids but she went anyway. She sure seemed to hate him and be trying to subtly undermine him for awhile there (the slapping away of all his attempts to hold hands and how on Twitter, @FLOTUS follows @barackobama but not @therealdonaldtrump). But she had to know how that would be interpreted, given the context of her trip. I think she’s far angrier about the fact that he cheated on her than about anything he’s done in office. She’ll probably never leave him because a) then she wouldn’t be First Lady and b) she likely had to sign an ironclad pre-nup.

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        Kate June 23, 2018, 5:28 am

        I really really really don’t think it was a message to Trump. I think Melania gets WAY too much of a pass because she’s younger than him and pretty and doesn’t speak much in public. People think, oh, poor Melania, she’s this lovely woman who’s somehow imprisoned in her marriage to this disgusting man. No way. Noooooo waaaayyyy. She chose this. She is just as much a piece of human excrement as the rest of them. Yeah, she may not like or respect him, but she’s not going anywhere. That message was for us, not him.

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        Kate June 23, 2018, 5:32 am

        I don’t think she’s angry he cheated on her either. This was not a love match marriage. She could not have had any expectation of fidelity from him. She was probably well aware of what he was doing and just had nothing to do with him privately. She’s angry at the media for embarrassing her, maybe, but the cheating itself is whatever for her, he’s not her husband in any sense but a bogus public image.

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      • bittergaymark

        Bittergaymark June 23, 2018, 11:10 am

        Yeah, I am so sick of people feeling sorry for a gold digging brat who really has the blandest of semi good looks. She created an alimony baby and is a user and thus scum. She deserves Trump.

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        Kate June 23, 2018, 12:37 pm

        I see comments from semi-literate trump supporters and they have disgusting things to say about Michelle O’s appearance, because God forbid a gorgeous African-American woman should be in the White House. They say she looks like a man. Well, no joke, I think Melania looks more and more like a skinny drag queen all the time. But they gush all over her, “she’s so beautiful and classy!” What?? She’s a hard-looking, orange, former cheesy softcore porn model who married the scum of the US for money. Is 40% of the US on drugs… oh. Yeah.

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        Kate June 23, 2018, 12:54 pm

        Yeah, I’m talking to you dipshits in your baseball caps with your goatees and your fat stomachs so you can’t see your little dicks when you look down. And you brassy-haired, doughy hos in Capri pants and stretch tops with your filthy-ass, hoarders-style living rooms in the background. Please leave the US.

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      • Dear Wendy

        Dear Wendy June 23, 2018, 5:47 pm

        This is accurate.

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  • Lucidity

    Lucidity June 22, 2018, 8:42 pm

    For anyone going to a protest:

    https://www.wildfang.com/ultimate-wf-bomber.html?split_id=21327

    All proceeds to RAICES. Comes in black and as a t-shirt.

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  • Guy Friday

    Guy Friday June 23, 2018, 9:53 am

    Just to add to the list of non-profit organizations you can donate to, I’d 100% advocate for donations to Kids In Need of Defense (KIND). They actively fund the legal defense of children in immigration proceedings, and while the focus has been (understandably so) on the Mexican border, the reality is that CBP and ICE are pulling the same crap on the other borders as well but getting less press for it. KIND sends its own lawyers to defend cases AND it will pay for admission fees to district court bars to allow other attorneys to jump in and appear on cases, allowing the lawyers who do to focus their energy and money on the defense and not on the administrative costs. It’s not sexy, but it’s much-needed.

    https://supportkind.org/about/

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  • Copa

    Copa June 23, 2018, 1:06 pm

    A guy I haven’t talked to since high school was trying to put me in my place on Facebook yesterday over something I posted about what was going on at the borer. He was trying to tell me that undocumented immigrants cannot seek asylum legally, and that’s just not true. So I told him that, and he kept trying to bait me into an argument with his “facts,” which I kept telling him weren’t even accurate. I called him out for being a troll (we literally haven’t’ seen each other in 16 years!), told him I didn’t want to argue or engage, and he was like, “I’m not arguing, just sharing facts.” Um, no. THEY’RE NOT TRUE IF THEY’RE NOT ACTUALLY FACTS! We met while I was living overseas as teenagers, and I’m completely baffled by how someone who spent some of his formative years as an expat grew up to be so narrow-minded and, frankly, stupid. He was using immigration quota stats to justify what’s going on at the border. But at the end of the day, it’s not even a political issue, it’s a humanitarian issue. He’s a new dad. Where on earth is his compassion? The family separations at the border has brought my mood WAY down this week.

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    • avatar

      keyblade June 23, 2018, 1:47 pm

      That is demoralizing. I’m sorry that happened. For me one of my biggest mental hurdles is that I don’t have policy answers about the broken immigration system, I just know cruelty when I see it. And the same people who think a good economy is the answer to everything, refuse to consider all the unintended consequences of that economy and the social costs.

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  • avatar

    keyblade June 23, 2018, 1:34 pm

    Here is a follow-up article about the raid in Salem.

    http://www.vindy.com/news/2018/jun/22/immigration-fresh-mark-probe-by-ice-ongo/

    Sixty of the Hispanic people were released because they did have proper documentation. Eighty Six workers are still being detained. Kudos to the St. Paul Parish in Salem for helping to care for the children the night of the raid and for Sister Rene Weeks being willing to speak on behalf of the local Gautamalen community, who may have been fleeing violence.

    “For those interested in helping, Sister Rene said to make monetary donations to St. Paul’s Church or First Christian Church in Salem, both of which have outreach programs for the local immigrant community. She asked people to indicate that they want their checks to go toward those affected by the raid. The money will go toward rent, utilities and food for affected families.”

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  • avatar

    ktfran June 23, 2018, 1:45 pm

    I’m sitting at the San Juan airport, waiting to go home, catching up on news and of course, DW. I’ve been unplugged, minus a couple hours here or there, since last Friday. I’m horrified to finally learn about what’s been happening at the border. Thanks Wendy for posting about it. And linking the CoJ article. Another blogger I read linked it too. So powerful. I love and appreciate that the three women bloggers I read most use their voices and share their opinions even if it means they might lose a few readers. Keep fighting the good fight.

    Guy Friday, I’m absolutely going to donate to Kind. Thank you for sharing.

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