Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Friday Links

Here are a few things from around the web that may interest you:

My In-Laws Are Careless About My Deadly Food Allergy!

And here’s a response to the column from Marie Claire: “Hot New Trend Alert: Poisoning Your Son’s Wife”

“Not so long ago, Japanese women who remained unmarried after the age of 25 were referred to as “Christmas cake,” a slur comparing them to old holiday pastries that cannot be sold after Dec. 25. Today, such outright insults have faded as a growing number of Japanese women are postponing or forgoing marriage, rejecting the traditional path that leads to what many now regard as a life of domestic drudgery.”

Craving Freedom, Japan’s Women Opt Out of Marriage

This was interesting: How Social Media Shapes Our Identity

This is a long but riveting story worth a read on your lunch hour: “The Harvard Professor and the Paternity Trap”

It Might Be Time To Cut My Right-Wing, Trump-Loving In-Laws Out Of My Kids’ Lives

Thank you to those who submitted links for me to include. If you see something around the web you think DW readers would appreciate, please send me a link to wendy@dearwendy.com and, if it’s a fit, I’ll include it in Friday’s round-up. Thanks!

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14 comments… add one
  • csp August 9, 2019, 10:34 am

    I have been reading a lot about the Japanese work culture and women. Basically, they have the same problems as the US does but with a smaller, denser population. They now have a very huge declining population and the country is going to need to change.

    Unfortunately for the US. because of our large immigration numbers, our population continues to grow. But you are starting to see the problem with the work culture. Very interesting.

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    TaraMonster August 9, 2019, 12:17 pm

    That Harvard Professor story is WILD. I feel really badly for Bruce Hay. He was easy prey to those women and they knew it.

    There’s also a follow up to the story that is equally crazy because Haider and Shuman have scammed and attempted to scam a ton of other men. Holy crap: https://www.thecut.com/2019/08/bruce-hay-paternity-trap-maria-pia-shuman-mischa-haider-follow-up.html

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    • Kate August 9, 2019, 12:29 pm

      Since we live in that same neighborhood, I told my husband about this so he can make sure to get a selfie with her if she approaches him and tells him he’s attractive in hushed tones. I’m pretty obsessed with this story right now.

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      • anonymousse August 9, 2019, 2:26 pm

        The hushed tones detail is so funny. Be careful, Kate!

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      Miel August 9, 2019, 12:46 pm

      Yes that story is just CRAZY. I just don’t understand what’s wrong with these women…? Like, what’s the motivation?

      Like, there are much more lucrative scams out there if that’s your thing… Or does she just want smart babies or what? I really don’t get it.

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      TaraMonster August 9, 2019, 2:26 pm

      Lol, Kate!

      I’ve been thinking about this story alll day. It’s just so freaking cray!

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      • Kate August 9, 2019, 2:39 pm

        The house is on the next street over from us, I can see it out my back window. That’s part of why I’m so into this, because it happened right here, but it’s a completely bonkers story regardless.

        Back in the winter or early spring when it was still dark in the morning, we were walking the dog, and going by that house we saw that the drivers’ side car door was wide open. It had been pouring all night, so that was weird. My husband went to check to make sure no one was in the car, and no one was, but a big raccoon jumped out of it and hustled away. I thought it was really weird at the time, and now I wonder if they did that to mess with him?

    • ArtsyGirl August 9, 2019, 2:54 pm

      Do not read the comments on this article – it must have circled a bunch of men’s right activist pages because tons of comments are about how evil feminism is and how this women voted for Hillary

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      • Kate August 9, 2019, 2:57 pm

        Yeah, I figured that. There’s a lot going on in this story, what with feminism and Title IX and the trans issues. I think it’s just a fascinating story, and it’s too bad the MRAs jumped on it, but I can sort of see why. The thing is, it’s just a couple of complete whackos, not in any way representative of feminism.

  • Part-time Lurker August 9, 2019, 2:05 pm

    RE Hay story: I read that story a week or so ago and was just stunned. Completely flabbergasted didn’t even describe it!

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    MaterialsGirl August 9, 2019, 3:03 pm

    So many interesting sub stories from the Japan article. I need to wait until i can read more times articles!

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    Cleopatra_30 August 9, 2019, 9:09 pm

    Wow the Ask Polly letter is just nuts. I cannot believe a group of people can be so inconsiderate about a persons allergies and deliberately include it in meals and be so closed off.

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    • Fyodor August 10, 2019, 10:35 am

      It’s terrible but I believe it. There are some people that just take other people’s dietary restrictions weirdly personally and believe on a gut level that they’re all either BS or selfish and unreasonable demands and push back on them.

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    • ? August 10, 2019, 1:23 pm

      As a parent of a child with several life threatening allergies. This is my worst nightmare for her. And also not totally unsurprising. Some people just genuinely don’t think they are real/inconsiderate.
      There’s research to show that food allergy rates are definitely increasing; I think that without that knowledge of willingness to believe it people see the increase in frequency as part of “fad” diets.

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