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Happy News

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In early November, about a week before we moved into our new apartment — the bigger, three-bedroom apartment our family could grow into regardless of whether we remained just the three of us or were lucky enough to add a fourth Condellberry to the mix — we grabbed some dinner at Shake Shack one evening. At the table next to us was a woman who used to own an upholstery and design store in our neighborhood until she closed it a couple years ago. She was there with her tween daughter. “Hi,” I said as we sat down, “You reupholstered a chair for us a few years ago.” It was a chair we’d bought on Craigslist for our soon-to-be nursery. She did a beautiful job with it.

“I remember,” she replied. “You were pregnant then. How old’s your son now?” she asked, gesturing to Jackson who was already making a mess of his food and demanding my attention.

“He turned three last month,” I replied, as he knocked over his whole cup of water. Our table mate jumped up to grab some napkins.

“Oh, thank you!” I said as she helped clean up.

“Girls have such a different energy,” she said calmly, glancing at her daughter who was sitting quietly working on homework. “When you have your daughter,” she continued, matter-of-factly, “You’ll see.” And without missing a beat, she slid back into her seat and finished her meal.

Ohh-kay, I thought, shooting Drew a look. I wasn’t even pregnant. At least, not that I knew of. But a few days later, I took a pregnancy test and it was a clear positive. After my chemical pregnancy/ miscarriage in September, we held our breath in the weeks that followed, but, when my first OB appointment in early December showed a strong, healthy heartbeat and we got to see a glimpse of our teeny baby-to-be, we breathed a big sigh of relief. This was happening! We were doing it again! We’re having a baby! And it has been no less thrilling this time around than it was when I was pregnant with Jackson.

Because of my age (38), we opted to do genetic testing. (We did the MaterniT21 test, which is new in the last couple of years, and which I highly recommend for women over 35; it’s a simple blood test with higher accuracy and much less risk than more traditional chromosomal testing like an amniocentesis). I went in for the test just a couple days before Christmas and was told it would be 7-10 days before we received results. Seven days passed, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve. TWO WEEKS passed and we still hadn’t received results. Why I didn’t just CALL my doctor, I don’t know. I just thought I would get a call when the results were in and didn’t want to bother anyone, which is sort of ridiculous, I know, especially considering how worked up I’d made myself. I was sure the results weren’t good and my doctor was waiting until my next scheduled appointment (a couple weeks after I had the tests done) to tell me the news in person.

I went in one afternoon just after the holidays, a bundle of nerves. It had been two weeks to the day since I had my blood drawn for testing. Unfortunately, Drew was stuck at work and couldn’t make the early part of my appointment, so I sat and waited in the exam room alone for 20 minutes, imagining the worst. Finally, the doctor came in and said, “I’ve been trying to call you for a week!!” (It turns out they had the wrong number for me on file). “I have good news!” she said. Oh, thank God.

“Everything is good,” she continued. “The tests were all normal.”

Thank God, thank God, thank God. I felt overwhelmed with relief and gratitude.

“Do you want to know what you’re having?” she asked.

“Yes!” I said.

 

“We’re having a girl!” I told Drew when he arrived from work. I met him in the lobby and showed him the strip of ultrasound pictures my doctor had given me to take home. “Here’s your daughter,” I said, my eyes filling with tears again, and we hugged and laughed and hugged some more.

Though I hadn’t wanted to be greedy and hope for anything more specific than a healthy baby, I’ve always wanted a daughter. A daughter!

I’m 15 weeks along now and everything is going fine. My first trimester was pretty easy except for the bone-crushing fatigue I remember from my pregnancy with Jackson. I was lucky enough to be spared the terrible morning sickness that plagues many a pregnant woman, but just when I thought I would manage to skate through two pregnancies without much nausea, it hit me a couple weeks ago. “That’s because you’re having a girl,” a friend reasoned. “They make you sicker. At least, that’s the myth,” she said.

I’ve also heard they “steal your beauty” when you’re pregnant with them, causing break-outs and face-bloat and lots of weight gain, oh my. But then, I’ve heard that, once they’re born, their “energy is very different” and they’re much calmer than boys. I guess time will tell!

We told Jackson a few days ago that he’s going to be a big brother (after reading him this book and this book). Fortunately, he’s been asking for a baby sister for months, so he took the news pretty well (not sure how it would have gone if we were having a boy…). He was a little overwhelmed (or maybe underwhelmed?) the evening we told him, assuring us it was “just pretend” and there wasn’t really a baby in mommy’s belly (despite my quickly-expanding waistline). But then the next morning he woke up and the first thing he said was, “I’m going to teach my baby sister the ABCs, I’m going to teach her to count, I’m going to read her books.” He’s going to be the sweetest big brother and this baby is going to be one lucky little girl.

She’s due in July and, needless to say, we’re so excited to meet her.

 

108 Comments

  1. Congratulations to you and Drew, this is fantastic news !!! I’m so happy for you guys, and this was beautifully written.

  2. Congratulations! One of each. Lucky you!!

  3. rocketgirl says:

    Congratulations!! So happy for you all! Lovely news to start the day!

  4. Oh hooray Wendy, congratulations to you and Drew!

  5. Avatar photo GertietheDino says:

    Congratulations Wendy and Drew (and a Jackson). Why am I crying?

  6. OMG CONGRATS I’M SOOOOO EXCITED FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!

  7. Avatar photo Dear Wendy says:

    Thanks, you guys! Sharing the news with the DW community is one of the best pre-baby experiences!

    1. Avatar photo Dear Wendy says:

      Congratulations to you too! When are you due?

  8. I’m so excited for you! Congrats!

  9. Sunshine Brite says:

    So exciting!!! Congrats!

  10. Congrats Wendy!!! So exciting! 🙂

  11. Avatar photo Pamplemousse Rose says:

    Congratulations!! I teared up reading this, so happy for you, Drew, and Jackson. I’m somewhat biased but daughters are awesome 🙂

  12. I am so, so excited for you! Congratulations Wendy!! What wonderful news 🙂

  13. Congratulations! Glad it’s a girl this time!

  14. Congratulations Wendy! I’m just so happy for you!

    Our journeys are so similar! I had a miscarriage in August and found out I was pregnant again in October. I had my NT scan with bloodwork just before Christmas and it took FOREVER to get the results. Everything looks good! We already have 3 year old little girl, so we were ecstatic to find out we are having a little boy. I’m 19 weeks now, and after an extremely rough first trimester, I’m finally feeling a little better.
    .
    I hope you continue to have a wonderful and healthy pregnancy. Cheers!

    1. Avatar photo Dear Wendy says:

      Yay — congrats to you! You will love having a boy — they’re so sweet (if also rambunctious). Isn’t that wait for the test results excruciating?

      1. It was the worst. I had myself convinced that my doctor was waiting to tell me at the appointment because she needed to give me the bad news in person. Not the case at all.

      2. Also, Thank you!! Little girls are awesome too.

  15. Laura Hope says:

    Wonderful news!! Congrats!!!!!

  16. Avatar photo Boobs Magee says:

    Congratulations!!! *happy dance*

  17. Avatar photo Addie Pray says:

    Best news ever!!!!

  18. snoopy128 says:

    yay! best news to wake up to! Congrats!

  19. Congratulations to you and your expanding family Wendy! That’s very exciting news and I’m so happy for you!!!! That story was absolutely lovely.

    I have to say, little girls may be physically calmer…. but my nieces wear me the eff out. All the make believe play and chatting can be exhausting in an entirely different way. I’ll be curious to read what you think in a few years about the differences between raising a boy and a girl.

    1. Avatar photo Dear Wendy says:

      I’m interested to see the difference myself, too. Jackson’s friends are pretty split between girls and boys and I have noticed moderate difference between the sexes, but I’m sure it will be different when I’m actually raising a girl and around her all the time.

  20. Congratulations! Daughters don’t make you fat, I gained MUCH less weight with my daughter than I did with my son, & yes much different energy. So happy for you all!

    1. Avatar photo Dear Wendy says:

      Interesting! I only gained 18 lbs. with Jackson, so we’ll see what happens with this pregnancy. So far, my my belly has popped sooner, but I’ve only gained a pound at most (thanks to the no-booze diet). I’m not really worried about it either way.

      1. YAY! Congratulations!!! Don’t worry about popping out sooner with the second pregnancy or thinking this is going to be a bigger baby. When I got pregnant with my second the doctor explained that because the uterus had already expanded with the first one, then it “filled up” quicker with the second pregnancy, making one appear further along. At the end, I wasn’t any bigger than my first.

  21. Avatar photo muchachaenlaventana says:

    This is so great!! I definitely teared up reading this, beautifully written. CONGRATS. Little girls are just the best.

  22. This is wonderful news!!! I’m so happy for you and Drew and Jackson!!! 🙂

  23. jilliebean says:

    Congratulations!!! I’m seriously as happy as if I knew you personally. Such great news!!! I have 2 girls and they are the loves of my life. Enjoy!!!!!

  24. Avatar photo veritek33 says:

    Oh that’s so exciting!!! Is it wrong that I want her to have your pretty red hair? Well, selfishly I want all babies to have pretty red hair because I’m biased, but still! Congratulations on your little girl and here’s hoping for some pretty red hair!

    1. Avatar photo Dear Wendy says:

      I would not be opposed to having a little redhead girl. 🙂

    2. Avatar photo Addie Pray says:

      Oh yes – a little redhead girl would be darling! I still think in some of the pictures Jackson’s hair looks like it has a little red in it. (Does it? I know I’ve met Jackson, but I can’t remember.) Maybe Jackson will have a red beard one day.

      1. Avatar photo Dear Wendy says:

        Sometimes in the sun, you can see a little red in his hair, but he’s definitely a brunette and not a ginger at all. Maybe a red beard one day, who knows!

  25. absurdfiction says:

    Yay! Congrats Wendy! 🙂

  26. Congratulations!! It must be a very exciting time for your whole family!

  27. Congratulations!!! How exciting, a daughter! I have a son a little bit younger than Jackson, and I’ve always wanted to have a son first, but since I was a kid I’ve dreamed of having a daughter…hopefully next time around I’ll be as lucky as you 🙂 Awesome that you get to experience having one of each. I’m sure Jackson is going to be a wonderful big brother!

  28. Avatar photo something random says:

    OMG OMG OMG. Congratulations!!! Its so weird how excited I feel for you! I don’t even know you, but I’m so happy for you and your family. I wish you a continued happy, healthy pregnancy.

  29. Crazy_Pug_Lady says:

    Congrats Wendy!

  30. Woo hoos from the Great White North!

  31. Yay! This is awesome! Congratulations!!!!

  32. Congratulations! I’m so excited for you. I’m sitting up in court for work and nearly started crying when I read this.

    1. Avatar photo Dear Wendy says:

      Oh, those crazy pregnancy hormones — they’ll make ya cry over everything! 😉

      1. The new McDonald’s commercial with all of the sentimental signs is now banned in our house because it turns me into a puddle of mush.

  33. Avatar photo findingtheearth says:

    Congrats! This is such fantastic news!

  34. Congratulations on your wonderful news!! So glad that Jackson will get the sister he wants. As I mentioned last week, I have two sons (3 1/2 yrs apart). And when I was pregnant the 2nd time my firstborn was pretty adamant about wanting A BROTHER… no two ways about it. When we asked “what if it’s a girl?” He said, “send it back.” 🙂 Lucky for me, from the beginning boys just felt “right” for me and I never felt I missed out by not having a daughter of my own.

    And now they are all grown up… oldest will be 27 in June; youngest just turned 23. And they have always been great, very close brothers!

    1. When my bonus kids’ mom was pregnant with her youngest, my bonus soon said if it was a boy he would sell it on eBay.

      1. I love the phrase “bonus kid.”

      2. I always thought “step” just had some kind of weird (negative) connotation. Well, probably because when I was growing up with my stepmom – it did. She made it clear that I wasn’t on the same level as her bio kids. I never wanted my kids to feel that way. They know that I couldn’t love them any more than I do and that I don’t consider them just an extension of their dad, but that they are truly my kids. Now that I’m pregnant, people keep asking if its my first so I’ll tell them that I have two children, but this is my first pregnancy. They usually just leave it at that, but if they want more explanation, I tell them a little more.

      3. Congrats on your pregnancy! Maybe I missed that earlier???

        Sorry to hear about your “step” experience. I had a college roommate who would say “my 1st father” and “my 2nd father.” I liked that too!

      4. By the way, did the bonus son get the sister he wanted?

      5. I think so??

      6. He did. She’s 6 now. And he wants our baby to be a boy, but said he doesn’t care either way (as in, he’s not going to sell this one on eBay?)

      7. Avatar photo Boobs Magee says:

        I only have one kid – a daughter. When she was about 6-years old, and there was a ‘possibility’ that I might have another child, her response was that she would ‘put it in the blender’ if I did.

  35. Avatar photo Stonegypsy says:

    Congratulations, Wendy! That’s wonderful!

  36. Aw! That is the best news! Congrats and here is wishing you an easy pregnancy and a beautiful, healthy and happy baby! And a girl! I’m biased by they are just the best. So happy for you!

  37. captainswife says:

    I’m so happy for you! Girls and boys are absolutely different…but girls can be different from other girls, too! It’s fantastic seeing all of them growing into who they’re meant to be.

    Good luck, and give us pictures!

  38. Yay!!! I haven’t had a chance to come on here yet, but Kate texted me and told me so I immediately came to the site – hooray!!! So thrilled for all of you! And a girl, what joy!
    *
    I know this is selfish, but I am bummed I can’t get my drink on with you in March!! We will just need to plan another NY Meet-up once baby girl makes her debut 🙂

    1. Avatar photo Dear Wendy says:

      I bummed too! Believe me, the not drinking for 9 months part of this is definitely not my favorite.

      1. My good Mormon doctor told me a glass of wine now and then was fine. 🙂

  39. Avatar photo the_optimist says:

    AHHHHHH CONGRATS WENDY!!!!

  40. RedroverRedrover says:

    Oh Congrats!!!!!!! That’s fantastic!!!!!! 🙂

  41. Congratulations Wendy!!

  42. Avatar photo Skyblossom says:

    Congratulations! As the mother of a son and a daughter I’m always pleased when someone gets to parent both. They really are different experiences, both fun and exciting and tiring and entirely unique.

  43. I was hoping it was this when I saw the headline! Congrats Wendy! You will make an awesome mom for a daughter— she’s so lucky!

  44. Avatar photo Moneypenny says:

    Congratulations Wendy and Drew!!!

  45. stickelet says:

    Congratulations! So exciting. Add me to the list of people who teared up while reading this.

  46. Congrats! That picture of him kissing your belly is priceless. 🙂

    But… I’m creeped out by the lady who seemed to be able to tell you were pregnant with a girl before you even knew you were pregnant. Even though she seems like a very nice lady. How freaky!

    1. Avatar photo Dear Wendy says:

      I think she’s probably a little psychic. She just seemed so sure and matter-of-fact.

  47. Avatar photo kmentothat says:

    I just want to thank you for your honest commentary as you contemplated trying for your second baby. Overjoyed for you and your family and wishing you health and happiness!
    .
    Also, we need to start a poll for best girl names!

    1. Avatar photo Dear Wendy says:

      Thank you! I definitely took my time coming to a decision (about trying for a second), but once I did, a weight was lifted from my shoulders. I still have worries, but I feel like this is the right choice for our family and we’re so happy it has worked out so far.

      And I think we have a girl name, but I’d love to hear guesses/ alternative suggestions.

  48. Congrats Wendy!! That is SUPER Exciting news! I’m so happy for you and the whole family.

    I also started tearing up reading this–my husband and I are talking about starting a family soon, and while it’s pretty exciting, I also think about your previous story and all the responses it garnered from women who had also gone through chemical pregnancies or miscarriages–and how in that time frame it had also happened to my sister in law (who has now given birth to the most adorable and wonderful baby!) and a close friend (who has not gotten pregnant again yet). And for some reason I’m pretty nervous to make a Drs appt and get the ball rolling. Maybe nervous to say it out loud, nervous about what that entails on the medical end (I don’t know why I hate going to the gyno so much LOL, I love my doctor and I have no problem at the dentist/with needles/having blood drawn etc that other people dislike! 🙂 and thinking about the different possibilities. Maybe it’s just been hard to watch people I care about go through this stuff.

    In summary and off that tangent, YAAAY I can’t wait to see pictures of what is sure to be an amazing baby girl, and the quote from Jackson was THE CUTEST 😀

    1. Avatar photo Dear Wendy says:

      It’s a roller-coaster, for sure. And I haven’t even experienced a fraction of what some women go through. But if you end up with a healthy baby at the end, I think any all hardships and challenged and heartaches and bumps in the road are worth it.

  49. Avatar photo veracityb says:

    Cool beans – congrats! (Has anyone said the slightly odd “well done!” to you yet?)

  50. Sue Jones says:

    Congratulations! I always wanted a daughter, but sons are pretty awesome too. Plus I would probably go broke dressing her up in all of the adorable outfits. When I go to buy my son dress shoes at Nordstoms kids shoes (only about a year left until he is in adult sizes!!!!! and $$$$$) I always kvell over the little girl sparkly red shoes and sparkly clothes…

    But my husband’s family only seems to make boys.

  51. Oh what happy, happy news! Congratulations to you and your family. Can’t wait to read your postings regarding this pregnancy and the differences with this baby. My first was a boy and my second was a girl (third was a boy) and I’ll tell you, changing my baby daughter’s diaper the first couple of weeks and not seeing a penis was . . . weird! And cleaning her up was more complicated too. LOL

  52. What happy, wonderful news!! It was heartbreaking to hear about things a few months ago so what a joyous thing! And a little girl! 🙂

  53. Congratulations, Wendy!! Such happy news.

  54. I am beyond thrilled for you guys! You’re a great Mom and this is one lucky little girl. Hugs!

  55. Avatar photo mrmidtwenties says:

    That’s so awesome, congratulations Wendy

  56. Oh wow! Congratulations so much! What happy and exciting news this is!

  57. Avatar photo eelavocado says:

    Congratulations, Wendy! Enjoy every moment.

  58. Hurray Wendy!!!! Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Little girls are the best =)

  59. Congratulations to you, Drew, and Jackson! I’m so excited for y’all.

  60. tbrucemom says:

    Congratulations! As the mother of a boy and a girl I can tell you that yes girls do have a different energy. I also didn’t have morning sickness with my son but did with my daughter so I think that’s true (too much estrogen in one body I think). I love both my children equally but I have to admit, especially now that they’re both grown, that having a daughter is awesome! You just have different relationships with them. Boys tend to put their moms on pedestals and girls can literally talk about anything. My daughter was also born in July (on my birthday)! The comment that lady made is so cool (and kind of spooky)!

  61. Avatar photo SavannahAnna says:

    Congratulations — what marvelous news! And Jackson’s plans for being a wonderful big brother to his baby sister are just precious. So glad for you all!

  62. Avatar photo bittergaymark says:

    Congrats! Wow. What big news!!

  63. Avatar photo LadyinPurpleNotRed says:

    YAY! Congratulations! That’s so exciting!!

  64. Avatar photo Mr. Cellophane says:

    Hoorah!! Many Cuban-dancing rodents!!

  65. snarkymarc says:

    My daughter says “girls rule, boys drool”. I guess you’ll find out soon enough. Congrats.

  66. karenwalker says:

    Congratulations!! How exciting!

  67. Such good news – Congratulations!

  68. That’s really great news Wendy! So much has changed, for the better, since you left “that other place” and went out on your own.

    And a huge *cyber* ^5 to Drew!

  69. OMG SUCH WONDERFUL NEWS!! Congratulations to you and your family:). And a GIRL. A girl that will have all your wisdom at her disposal while growing up… We are talking first female president material here, I think (if Hillary doesn’t beat her to the plate).

    1. Avatar photo Dear Wendy says:

      Ha ha. With my genes, I don’t think she’ll be first female president of anything except maybe fan club of whatever chocolate is popular among the kid set when she turns five.

  70. aurorealis says:

    Awesome news! Congratulations!

  71. theotherbarb says:

    How did I miss this yesterday??!! This is such wonderful news! Yep, girls are awesome, and so are boys – having had one of each (back in the ancient day) I can tell you that! I’m so happy for you, and wish you all the best – great pregnancy, short labor, and healthy baby!

  72. Avatar photo suzyinthesky says:

    I’m late to the party, but CONGRATS WENDY!!! Mazel tov! This is wonderful news. How very exciting for you all. I bet Jackson will be a great big brother. And I’m crossing my fingers and toes for red curls for your girl. So beautiful!

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