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The last straw was bailing on New Years Eve. He had bailed the previous Friday because of work and I was soooooo pissed I told him I was done, however, he promised he’d be down for New Years and that he really likes me and misses me. Then, the day before New Years Eve I get that infamous text that he has to work. I about died.
When he bailed NYE I honestly texted him, “F*** YOU” because I’m so fed up and disappointed. He’s done it so many times, I really thought he would pull through this time. I’ve told him a million times that he may live 2 1/2 hrs away — which really isn’t that far — but that after six months we should be seeing each other every other — if not every — weekend. Four times a month is not asking for a lot.
A couple months ago I brought up the serious relationship talk and what he wants out of this and he said he really likes me and does see a future. But I kid you not, if there were 48 hours in a day, he would work them all, seven days a week. It’s strange…like, why does he keep texting me and not letting me end it if he is so busy or if there’s someone else? I’m so exhausted with giving him chances. I’m really interested in what you think. — Phoning it In
Oh, honey, MOA. This guy is not into you. He’s so not into you, he hasn’t bothered to see you in over two months despite living less than three hours away. He’s so no into you he can’t even be bothered to TELL you he isn’t into you. He just wants you to take the hint and move on already. Seriously. He keeps you around because it would take MORE energy to cut you loose than to answer a random, flirty text here and there. If he wanted to be your boyfriend, he’d start acting like a boyfriend.
Every once in a while I like to publish letters like yours in hopes that other young women in your situation will recognize themselves and see with more objective eyes how pathetic they’re being. Ladies, listen up: if someone you’re interested in wants to be with you, he’ll be with you. It’s that plain and simple. Don’t listen to what he says, watch how he acts. If he isn’t acting like a boyfriend, he doesn’t want to be one (not to you anyway), and it’s time for you to MOA. That goes for you, too, LW. Erase his number from your phone and move on.
*If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, send me your letters at firstname.lastname@example.org and be sure to follow me on Twitter.