Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Housekeeping: Forum Moderation, Etc.

It came to my attention over the weekend that there’s some confusion about the role of the forum moderator. For the record, Kate, whom many of you know as a longtime and frequent DW commenter with an amazing memory for details, has been a volunteer forum moderator for a couple years. She is not an employee of the site! There are no paid employees of the site. There’s Kate, who volunteers as forum moderator, and my mom, who is a retired English teacher and volunteers as a copy editor, and I’m very grateful to them both for the time and energy they invest to help keep the site running smoothly and looking at least a little professional. They do these jobs because it’s fun for them, they enjoy the site, and it’s something of a “pastime” (Kate’s word here, and I think my mom would agree, too).

Someone asked me if Kate speaks for me, if the views she expresses in her comments reflect the site/me, and the answer is: Kate speaks for herself and I speak for myself! I don’t think either one of us has a problem speaking for ourselves. Kate’s role as keymaster is to keep trolls under control. She very rarely deletes or edits a comment — almost never from regulars, and only if there’s, like, a slur in it. Sometimes a comment may automatically go to spam because of a glitch or something, but I promise that, when that happens, it is not Kate or me deleting comments that we simply don’t like or don’t agree with. In summary: Kate’s comments are her own; they do not necessarily reflect the views of the site. She is not employed by me, but she has a full-time job and does the forum moderation in her free time and on a volunteer basis. In addition, the only other person who pitches in is my mom, who edits, also on a volunteer basis, and I don’t believe she has any presence in the forums or comments at all, but if she did, it should be noted to avoid confusion, my mother’s comments would be solely a reflection and expression of her own views as well.

I do not employ any staff at all, I am not in a position to employ a staff; this is a part-time gig for me that pays a part-time salary and supplements my main job as a mom of two small kids. (If you’re curious, know that my salary comes from ad revenue — with major support from my ad network — and from affiliate commissions.) As always, I am really grateful to everyone’s support — as readers of the site, as advice-seekers, as commenters, and as volunteers who help keep things running smoothly. I hope this clarifies things for anyone who may have been confused.

24 comments… add one
  • avatar

    MissD February 19, 2018, 3:25 pm

    Well now I’m curious and I wanna know who said what! Lol.

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  • avatar

    keyblade February 19, 2018, 3:35 pm

    I love reading the comments in the forums. Clearly Kate (and Wendy) are doing excellent work, here. This site is a breath of fresh air from so many other comment forums. Thanks for all the extra volunteer work you’ve done here, Kate.

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  • avatar

    keyblade February 19, 2018, 3:36 pm

    Wish I wrote prettier.

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  • avatar

    TheHizzy February 19, 2018, 4:05 pm

    @MissD there was a guy last week who claimed Kate or Wendy were deleting his comments on years old post because they were “pending moderation” since he wasn’t signed in.

    There’s been just some general confusion over time too.

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  • avatar

    Kate February 19, 2018, 4:11 pm

    I think Wendy makes it clear when she says “forum moderator,” but jic, I don’t touch the main page columns at all, just the forums.

    And it’s not any work on my part. I see trolls, like that kid in the movie saw dead people. I was doing it anyway, but Wendy gave me the magic power to make them go away.

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    • avatar

      SpaceySteph February 20, 2018, 9:57 am

      Hah… except the dead people didn’t know they were dead and the trolls totally know they’re trolling.

      Thanks for all your work making the forums a nice place to hang!

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      • Cleopatra Jones

        Cleopatra Jones February 20, 2018, 10:28 am

        I dunno, if they know they are trolling. I think they think they are being ‘helpful’ or expressing an unpopular opinion.
        But hey, trolls gon’ troll.

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      • avatar

        Kate February 20, 2018, 10:40 am

        It’s more people who make up completely fake scenarios or post the same nonsense week after week, than it is people being mean to each other or expressing unpopular opinions, though there’s a bit of that.

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      • avatar

        keyblade February 20, 2018, 10:58 am

        I almost felt like putting up a Nixon image and proclaiming “I am not a troll” but I restrained myself from trying to make a serious point using humor that is only funny to me. I’m learning, Kate 😉

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      • avatar

        SpaceySteph February 20, 2018, 12:42 pm

        Oh dear, didn’t mean to start something.

        But I think the dude who came to “warn” us about Wendy knew he was trolling. You don’t assume your mean comments are getting deleted because the site mods can’t handle the truth without understanding that you’re posting mean/unpopular views in the first place…

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    • avatar

      Kate February 20, 2018, 12:06 pm

      Keyblade, Wendy said it already, but I’ll say it again. No one is moderating you or any regulars. I think I could count on one hand the times I’ve edited or deleted a comment from someone who comments regularly, and it would have to have something really aggressive in it.
      One more time – you have never been moderated.

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      • avatar

        keyblade February 20, 2018, 12:22 pm

        @Kate: Thank you for clarifying. I know my phrasing can be provoking. To me it reads silly but I accept that others may read it as hostile, vague, or confusing. I will carefully avoid accidently trolling any thread or crossing Wendy’s posting guidelines.

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      • avatar

        Kate February 20, 2018, 12:28 pm

        Ok, one MORE time, you are not a troll. You have not crossed any posting guidelines. If I have disagreed with you it’s because I as a commenter disagreed with you. Say whatever you want. It’s fine.

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  • avatar

    brise February 19, 2018, 4:14 pm

    Thanks, Kate, always very good and lucid posts.

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    • avatar

      Kate February 19, 2018, 4:16 pm

      Thanks Brise, you too.

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  • Lianne

    Lianne February 20, 2018, 9:38 am

    Wow. I can’t believe Kate and Wendy don’t have identical views. I feel like my DW-reality has been shattered.

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  • avatar

    keyblade February 20, 2018, 12:39 pm

    I really am sorry, Kate. Lets go back to gun control and alcoholic mothers. I think I’ve gotta call it a day, but FWIW I generally enjoy reading your comments.

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    • avatar

      Kate February 20, 2018, 12:45 pm

      Well then maybe you’ll enjoy the new blog I’m starting soon called “The Lord is My Shepherd,” where I’ll be buying clothes, trying them on with a spiked Starbucks in my hand, linking to them, and then returning them. That’s going to be my new F/T job, but I’ll still volunteer on here, to, again, delete threads started by people who are making stuff up to waste people’s time. Wendy started this post to clarify that, and I don’t want it to be further confused. Good day.

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      • avatar

        Kate February 20, 2018, 12:45 pm

        Blog name credit: Lianne

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      • Lianne

        Lianne February 20, 2018, 2:28 pm

        You’re all welcome.

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      • Cleopatra Jones

        Cleopatra Jones February 20, 2018, 2:42 pm

        I’ll read it because I want to be Kate when I grow up. 🙂

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      • avatar

        ktfran February 20, 2018, 2:57 pm

        I hope this is true.

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  • Dear Wendy

    Dear Wendy February 20, 2018, 4:10 pm

    I should have included these links in the post, but for new readers or anyone who missed these the first time around:

    Reader Recs: Kate’s Fabulous Finds
    http://dearwendy.com/reader-recs-kates-fabulous-finds/

    Reader Recs: Kate Shares More Beauty Products
    http://dearwendy.com/reader-recs-kate-shares-more-beauty-products/

    Reply Link
    • avatar

      Kate February 20, 2018, 4:21 pm

      Ohhh, just wait until I start mixing religious inspiration with fashion and alcohol. I’m going to be dressing you all like a little army and retiring at 45.

      PS, Wendy, why don’t you do try-ons?

      Reply Link

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