It’s time again for Shortcuts. For every question, I’ll give my advice in three sentences or less, because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great, being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to go. Today we discuss being a Baby Mama, meddling in your parents’ affairs, and dealing with jealous friends.
I definitely wouldn’t trust a guy who said he wants to marry you two weeks after you met him.
My mum and dad look reasonably happy and hug and kiss, etc. But my mum can have a bit of a temper and argues over lots of small stuff and she has put weight on lately. Do you think my dad is having an affair, and if so, what I should do? I really don’t want to break the family up and I don’t want them to get a divorce because my mum doesn’t work fulltime so would not be able to realistically look after herself, AND she doesn’t get on brilliantly with her parents.
— Worried about Mum and Dad
For all you know, “Adam” is a pet name your dad has for your mother, and even if it isn’t and your hunch about an affair is correct, you would be utterly incapable of cleaning up any mess your meddling might create. Since the stakes are so high, you need to do everyone a favor, butt out and mind you own business. Your parents can deal with their own issues, and surely there’s enough drama in high school to keep you occupied, right?
Unfortunately, you can’t force your friends to be happy for you, but you can force them to move out, which is probably what they resent most of all. Offer to help them find new homes, show excitement for the things going on in their lives, make an effort not to disappear into your couple bubble, and if they’re still acting like snots, thank your lucky stars that your future includes much more than living like a character from “Sex and the City.” Besides, in another year or two, your friends will most likely be settling down, too, and turning to you for advice and practical insight.
*If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, send me your letters at firstname.lastname@example.org and be sure to follow me on Twitter.