Miss Manners recently answered a wedding-related letter I thought DW readers would have a field day with. Here’s the question:
Recently our friend, who is 55 and marrying this spring (her third marriage), has told her friends that she intends to host a potluck wedding. She is inviting 100 people to an estate property lent to them for the weekend. She and her husband-to-be will ask guests to bring an assigned dish. They are both employed, own two homes (they intend to consolidate into a single household) and are planning a post-wedding vacation. Many of her friends (myself included) are somewhat distressed that she made this decision, indicating that she did not want to pay for caterers. Several friends have suggested economical alternatives. But she is now more committed than ever to require her guests to contribute all the food, beverages, paper products and alcohol. Very specific wedding gifts have also been requested.
We will dutifully bring whatever we are assigned (fingers crossed that we are not assigned filet mignon), but we are still holding out hope we can change her thinking.
Any suggestions about how we should approach her? Or should we just grin and bring the food?
You can click here to read Miss Manners’ reply. What would you say to the LW? What do you think about couples who have potluck weddings and assign specific dishes to each guest? And what if those couples are getting married for the third time AND requesting gifts on top of the potluck contributions??