Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Kavanaugh Vs. Women

Like many of you, I have been infuriated by the reaction to Christine Blasey Ford’s allegation that Brett Kavanaugh sexually assaulted her at a party when he was 17, from people claiming she’s making it up for attention or a political diversion to those saying it shouldn’t matter that it happened because it was so long ago and Kavanaugh was only 17 and he was drunk, as if a 17-year-old’s behavior is never a reflection of his character or core self. “Infuriated” isn’t even a strong enough word. I’ve been so sick about it that I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s directly tied to my getting Shingles. Honestly.

Christine Blasey Ford was 15 when she says Kavanaugh assaulted her. I was 15 when I was sexually assaulted by a stranger in an elevator. I’ve shared this story before, but as a refresher: I was on a school trip to a Model United Nations conference, staying in a hotel with my group from school. At our hotel were groups from other schools and lots of people traveling on business trips. The hotel had a nice pool, and during our stay (which was maybe five days or so) there were a couple evenings that I hung out in the pool after our daily sessions at the conference. During these times, I rode the elevator down to the pool in just my swimsuit – no coverup or anything. Maybe I forgot to bring a coverup, maybe I was just in a hurry. I’m sure I thought nothing of it. I was 15 – I still felt like a kid. Kids ride hotel elevators in just their swimsuits sometimes. I’ve seen adults do it, too. I didn’t think anything of it.

Anyway, I was assaulted in the elevator, but not when I was wearing a swimsuit. It was morning and I was dressed in business attire for our conference sessions that day. I’d finished breakfast and was taking the elevator down to the lobby to wait for my group. I got into the elevator and there was this man in an ill-fitting, outdated powder blue suit. I’d see the man a few times that week (usually in the same suit). He was creepy looking and I always tried to avoid him, but here he was in the elevator I was about to step into and there was no way to avoid him unless I walked away or let the door close and waited for a different one. But that would be rude, and I didn’t want be rude. So I got in the elevator, the doors closed, and he pushed the stop button, pinned me against the wall, grabbed my breasts, grabbed me between my legs, and started sliding his hand down my underwear—at which point I was able to break from his grip, knee him in the groin, push a bunch of buttons to make the elevator start again, and run as fast as I could when the door opened. I was able to get away from him and get back to my room, which I was sharing with some classmates who were still there getting ready. I told them what happened and they told me I had to tell our teacher.

I didn’t really want to tell our teacher. I felt embarrassed. Like, really embarrassed, and I didn’t want to draw any more attention to myself. I wanted to just forget it had happened. My my friends convinced me I needed to tell our teacher and tell the people at the front desk so the man could be dealt with and not try the same thing again to someone else in the hotel. So, reluctantly, I told our teacher. And she looked at me and said, “Well, you’ve been running around the hotel all week in nothing but your swimsuit….” … Like, what did I think would happen? Of COURSE some creepy businessman would assault me. My teacher was a liberal, progressive feminist who was beloved by students. If SHE thought a teenager could basically ask to be sexually assaulted by the way she dressed, who would sympathize with me? I kept my mouth shut after that. I didn’t even tell my parents. The teacher never followed up with me in the weeks after, to see how I was feeling, to make sure I was ok. On a self-report I turned in after the conference, she commented that I would have gotten more out of the experience if I hadn’t spent so much time flirting with boys and hanging out at the pool.

People want to know why a 15-year-old victim of sexual assault wouldn’t come forward for over 35 years? Because girls in America are given every message available that even if their allegations of sexual assault are believed, they probably brought it on themselves, that it’s not that big a deal, that the assaulter simply couldn’t help himself, and that there’s no reason to bring him down over something that you were partly responsible for (by your attire, your behavior, by existing). And that’s if a girl is believed! Many are not. Many rightly believe they wouldn’t be or that their character would be dragged through the mud or that it would be a He Says/She Says debate that they are almost sure to lose because a male’s voice is ALWAYS valued more than a female’s. Christine Blasey Ford is a goddamn hero for coming forward, to protect the sanctity of our highest court and all of us affected by decisions made within it, when she has so much to lose (her privacy, her personal safety, her reputation, to name a few things).

Even now, in 2018, I have been hoping other women who were assaulted by Kavanaugh would feel called to make a similar personal sacrifice, risk being victimized all over again, and come forward with allegations against him because: you know there are others! If there was one, there are others. A guy like Kavanaugh — rich, white, celebrated, private school-educated, supported by a social circle that shares the same value system — doesn’t strike just once. He does it again and again and again because he knows he can. Like Trump, he believes he is entitled to whatever he wants, especially a female’s body. Egged on by classmates who think it’s funny, fueled by liquor, and supported by a society that values rich white dudes above all else, guys like Kavanaugh physically attack women more than once (to say nothing of all the other non-physical ways they attack us and compromise our lives and personal rights). So I hoped some of the other victims would be brave enough to come forward because the other given in our society, besides rich white boys getting away with whatever they want, is that the voice of one woman is worth maybe a quarter of the value of a single man’s voice (even less if that man is a celebrity, very wealthy, or a powerful political figure). You really need a chorus of at least four women refuting one man in order for their voices to matter enough to make a difference.

We now have the voice of a second woman, another hero — Deborah Ramirez — now alleging that Kavanaugh assaulted her. Two more women and even Republicans may begrudgingly take their allegations seriously. Just kidding, they won’t — not when a seat on the Supreme Court is at stake, as well as the ability to police women’s bodies and compromise our autonomy and our rights even more than they are already. But there just may be enough public outcry to prevent Kavanaugh from taking a seat on our highest court. Maybe.

I want to believe that Kavanaugh’s nomination will be withdrawn. I want to believe that even if it isn’t withdrawn (and it won’t be), the Senate vote will fall clearly on the side of decency. But I don’t know. So much of the reaction to Ford, and now Ramirez, has triggered all the fury I’ve ever felt about the way females are treated. I am furious and I am exhausted, and I am laid up in bed with Shingles, and I don’t think it’s a coincidence. I am literally fucking sick over this shit. Come on, America — step up and be better than this; our daughters are listening.

Related: Can we talk about Ford/Kavanaugh? and What it’s Like to be a Woman in America in 2012.

69 comments… add one
  • juliecatharine September 24, 2018, 9:20 am

    Thank you for sharing your story again Wendy. You’re not alone in feeling outraged and just goddamn sick and tired of this bullshit. I hope you recover from shingles quickly!

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  • bondgirl September 24, 2018, 9:25 am

    I also really want to think the outcome of all this is to disqualify Kavanaugh from his nomination…..but it’s blatantly clear that McConnell couldn’t give two shits and is gonna just push it through anyway. Beyond despicable.

    Also, I find it interesting — in the most horrifying way — that Dr Ford’s accusation is hugely doubted. But at the same time people are outraged over the Catholic church sex abuse allegations from 30 something years ago, and also believe Bill Cosby should be held accountable for the sexual assaults he’s committed from the same time period. So why is her very credible accusation put in so much more doubt than these other accusations? I’d love to know why.

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    • Kate September 24, 2018, 9:28 am

      Multiple accusers always get more cred than a single accuser. At least we’re heading in the multiple accuser direction now.

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      • Taylor September 24, 2018, 8:44 pm

        Up to four now!

    • Dear Wendy September 24, 2018, 9:45 am

      That’s what I’m saying: the voice of one woman is meaningless to those who don’t value women. You have to have MANY female voices speaking up, making similar allegations, to actually gain traction. And even then, a person — if he’s white and rich and male — can still be elected president so…

      I’m not holding my breath on Kavanaugh not still making it to the Supreme Court, but we’ll see.

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    • MaggieB September 24, 2018, 12:02 pm

      Over the course of decades since we had an idea of the magnitude of the problem, the response to the Catholic Church molestation problem was horrifyingly tepid from right-wingers, until the most grossly backward side of the Church recently seized upon it as a convenient atrocity to blame on Pope Francis and teh gayz.

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    • meadowphoenix September 25, 2018, 8:39 am

      Are you certain there’s a great deal of overlap? Because I’m not seeing a great deal of belief for any of those situations (yes including the Catholic Church abuse) anywhere.

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  • Bittergaymark September 24, 2018, 9:38 am

    The New Yorker has a KILLER piece on this.

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    • Kate September 24, 2018, 9:43 am

      God bless Ronan and Jane. I heard a rumor they may have the apprentice tapes too, where Dump uses the N word and such. Not that that would bother 36%+ of the country.

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  • SpaceySteph September 24, 2018, 9:51 am

    They must really think they’re gonna lose big in November or they wouldn’t be pursuing his confirmation, they’d withdraw him and put up some other conservative white dude with hopefully a less checkered past.

    That’s at least an encouraging thought.

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    • LisforLeslie September 24, 2018, 10:49 am

      That is exactly what’s happening. They screwed Obama and now they’re really worried that if the blue wave crashes … the Dems will stop all of this as payback (which they should). That Garland didn’t get even the smidge of a hearing and this shit for brains who has lied his way through his nominations and has serious gambling issues is seen as a viable judge. The Democrats should be yelling about the lies (Thank you Booker) and should be screaming at the gambling debts – a man who goes $200K in debt over gambling is not a man with common sense.

      And this is the one time that I want to scream “Not all Men!”
      Not all men try to sexually assault partners
      Not all men try to sexually assault inebriated women
      Not all men slap their damn dicks on a drunk woman’s face
      Not all men select their interns and clerks by how screwable they are

      Not all men are rancid creeps. Therefore when someone does do this – we should be aghast and cry out that this behavior IS NOT NORMAL and we should call out the men who do this as the assaulters, abusers and creeps that they are.

      and now Rod Rosenstein (schmuck…)

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      • Dear Wendy September 24, 2018, 11:24 am

        I agree that it’s not all men And this isn’t “normal” per se, but there is a boys’ club culture — which has historically been a most powerful culture in our society, lifting its members to the highest offices and positions — that DOES see this behavior as normal because it is for them. It’s what they grew up with and participated in, and they don’t understand what the big deal is. It’s all just for fun! Just guys being guys, having a good time! What’s all the fuss about? Why ruin a “good” man’s (i.e. rich and white) reputation over a little drunken “horseplay”?

      • LisforLeslie September 24, 2018, 11:48 am

        Agreed, which is why I think we have to say “No, it’s not normal to assault people. And no not everyone has done it. So stop saying that your desire to slap your dick on someone’s face is normal. It’s not.”

        It’s like when someone learns that getting beaten every day is not normal parenting. We need to call out not normal. Loudly.

      • SpaceySteph September 24, 2018, 1:02 pm

        For the record, I do not think the Democrats should hold up all of Trump’s nominees just because the Republicans did it, or just because they don’t want to swing the court conservative. They shouldn’t allow that fuckery to become some kind of precedent.

        However they absolutely should hold up the confirmation of this particular asshole.

      • LisforLeslie September 24, 2018, 3:58 pm

        @Spacey – if I thought for one second that if another nomination had to go through Le Dump would not pick a hypocritical, misogynistic, anti-LGBTQ, racist fuckwad, I’d agree that the Dems shouldn’t stand in the way. None of this is normal.

      • Dear Wendy September 24, 2018, 5:14 pm

        Agree! The dems should hold that SC seat until we have another president.

      • meadowphoenix September 25, 2018, 8:43 am

        I mean, not all of anyone does anything, but that is rather irrelevant when we’re talking about societal behaviors and miens, and that the grand majority of people are content to let bad behavior happen without some type of social structural overhaul.

        And behavior can ABSOLUTELY be normal while also being despicable. It’s silly to pretend that male violence against women isn’t ingrained into the very fabric of gender roles.

    • LisforLeslie September 25, 2018, 10:12 am

      Meadow – I think we agree more than we disagree on this. Calling assault “normal” – aka “Boys will be boys” is the normalization of aggressive and violent behavior. Calling out that Assault. Is. Not. Normal. is something that we have to do.

      Softer example is the “Grab Her by the Pussy” tape – and the excuse that it’s just locker room talk. How many people stood up and said “No, people don’t talk like that in locker rooms – you’re simply abhorrent. “

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  • keyblade September 24, 2018, 10:05 am

    Kudos to you, Wendy. With all the pain and loss you are currently living through, you are a really strong person to be able to use your talents, this way. Thank you for being willing to write about what is undoubtedly a painful experience and the other awful way people react to these things. I think writing columns like these has to take a lot of your personal time and energy. It isn’t easy to turn this stuff off and focus on your own children, recovery, and personal health.

    I feel like at this point, I’m not going to change any minds and it’s crazy-making to try with people who need long-rooted misogynistic culture in their life. One can’t make anyone care about another person’s injustice, but it should at least be heard and considered for a supreme court nominee. Of course, the dissenters can’t be made to care, so it’s up to the people who do care to make as much noise as they can within their own parameters. Thanks you taking the time to write about such an emotionally exhausting and legally important matter. Get well, soon.

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  • Kate September 24, 2018, 10:10 am

    And … Dump is firing Rod Rosenstein… looks like it’s really happening. Help!!!

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    • LisforLeslie September 24, 2018, 10:52 am

      @Kate all that keeps me sane is remembering that Mueller got four freaking plea deals from the four people he indicted. With Manafort agreeing to go on record, Dems and Republicans should be shaking in their boots about which lobbyists they’re connected to and that Mueller would release information damaging to them.

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      • Kate September 24, 2018, 12:09 pm

        Ok, phew, crisis apparently averted for now. He’s staying in the job.

  • Vathena September 24, 2018, 10:54 am

    A-fucking-men, Wendy. I am so sorry for what you experienced on that trip. Fuck that guy, and your teacher, too. Disgusting.

    People had better get out and vote in November. I’m giving to as many candidates as I can (so many women are running for office!) I’m going out canvassing in my nearest swing district for a second round this weekend. I don’t know how much it will help in the end, but it makes me feel slightly less sick about it all.

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  • Taylor September 24, 2018, 12:57 pm

    Your teacher was beyond wrong. What the actual fuck. Solidarity with your rage.

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  • convexexed September 25, 2018, 2:41 am

    Wendy I just wanted to say I hope you feel better soon. I got shingles when I was 29 in nursing school, probably from the stress. It wiped me out like I’ve never been, and I’m allergic to one of the only medications that would’ve helped with the nerve pain! Not only was I exhausted, but I couldn’t stay still because it was so uncomfortable, so I was just a restless wreck.
    Keep taking care of yourself and resting! I thought I was some anomaly but I’ve since met several other young people who’ve had it (previously I’d thought it mostly affected seniors). We live in acutely stressful times…obviously…

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    • Dear Wendy September 25, 2018, 6:47 am

      Thank you! I definitely underestimated the pain and discomfort I’d be under. At least I can sleep though. Last night the pain was so bad and I was so exhausted, I ended up falling asleep at 8 pm and slept 11 hours! Woke up still in pain but a little more tolerable.

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  • Bittergaymark September 25, 2018, 9:11 am

    Hah. Now K’s freshmen Yale college roommate has come foward with the none too surprising news that K was often rudely and belligerant drunk. More, said roommate knows the second woman making claims and fully supports her dick waving claim as true as it certainly sounds like something K abd his social circle would do… He knew the accuser very well and that she had a reputation for honesty and integrity…

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    • Kate September 25, 2018, 9:17 am

      But hey, let’s ignore all that. We are gonna plow this thing through! No pun intended!

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      • LisforLeslie September 25, 2018, 10:15 am

        Well, if you know that your nominee has significant issues it’s much better to ram that through rather than say… find another nominee.

        If I were a candidate, I’d be calling out this bs in every ad I could afford.

  • Bittergaymark September 25, 2018, 10:31 am

    The clear message of the week is that the rape women simply doesn’t matter. And not just with Kavanblah either. It matters little with Cosby. (a measely three year sentence?). It matters even less in Alaska. Where a CONVICTED rapist got probation.
    The message all this is clearly sending the next generation? It’s painfully and frightfully clear. Go ahead and rape, boys. Go ahead and rape. This fucking confounds and astounds me…

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    • LisforLeslie September 25, 2018, 12:42 pm

      SIgh- another day, another judge (or three) give rapists less time had they stolen a car.

      BGM – I couldn’t understand homophobia until I realized that straight men were terrified of gay men because they assume gay men are as predatory as straight men are to women.

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  • Lorraine September 25, 2018, 12:29 pm

    While I disagree with you on most political issues, I am a daily reader. I never comment because I find political discussions online almost always escalate to name calling and unnecessary hostility.
    However, in an effort to give you and your readers an honest view of the other side of the argument, I decided to respond. I am of the mind that with he-said, she-said issues, the truth probably lies somewhere in the middle. If I believe that a watered down version of her story did occur, I do not believe that would preclude him from serving on the SC. Even with the additional (in my opinion, non-credible) accusations there have been 0 complaints against him for the last 30 years. He was confirmed to the Court of Appeals without incident. There have been no questions about his conduct while serving as a Judge for over a decade.
    Calls for blocking any Trump nomination(s) as payback for Republicans’ blocking Obama’s final appointment are not how this country is supposed to work. The Republicans blocked it because it was a Presidential election year and Obama had less than a year left to serve in office. While I did not agree with it, it is not the same as what is currently happening. In addition, the Republicans did not mislead the public as to their motives. It was stated outright.
    For people to hope that more ‘victims’ are found is troubling to me. It is a sad commentary as to how politics has come between us as a society. Hoping that more women have suffered some kind of sexual assault in order to undermine a president you do not care for seems wrong to me.
    It should not be this easy for an unprovable claim to ruin a man’s life and career. As noted in your updated letter today, women are certainly capable of bad behavior and should not be taken at their word simply because they are women. Yes all victims of sexual assault should be believed and taken seriously but no person should ever be punished without some sort of evidence or corroboration. Particularly 30+ years after the fact.

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    • Dear Wendy September 25, 2018, 1:14 pm

      I do not hope that more women have suffered and I stated that clearly. I believe the women who have already come forward and I believe 100% that a man who behaves that way with two women, has behaved that way with others. My hope is that THEY come forward. You are twisting my words and that’s not cool.

      You say that “no person should ever be punished without some sort of evidence or corroboration. Particularly 30+ years after the fact.” If not getting a lifetime seat on ur highest court is “punishment,” Kavanaugh will survive. It’s not like he’s being threatened with jail time. He’s at risk for not getting a job that nine people in the whole country are lucky enough to get. And I don’t care if what he’s accused of happened over 30 years ago. There are no statute of limitations of terrible character, and sexually harassing someone at 17 is absolutely a reflection of someone’s character. He didn’t somehow over the past 35+ years develop the kind of character a judge on the Supreme Court should have.

      I’m curious: how many women would have to come forward before you believed them? What if women came forward who voted for Trump? Would you believe them then? At what point is a woman’s allegation believable for you?

      You want to know why nothing was said for over 30 years and now suddenly people are speaking up? Because he was never nominated for the Supreme Court until NOW!! Why didn’t women whom he sexually harassed before now speak up? Because he’s been in a position of power for a long time. speaking up against them could have cost women their careers, their reputations, etc., etc. Do you not understand this? Do you, as a woman, really not understand how infrequently women are believed when they speak up? How little effect their speaking up has on their except negatively on their own lives? The women who are speaking up now are doing so out of a sense of civic duty because this is by far the biggest and most powerful position Kavanaugh has ever been up for and it’s impertinent to stop a creep from him from holding such an important position.

      Are you opposed to an FBI investigation into the allegation against Kavanaugh? If so, I’d love to know why. People who lie don’t typically want an FBI investigation into allegations they’ve made. People who do lie have a much bigger reason to fear them.

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      • Lorraine September 25, 2018, 2:03 pm

        I in no way twisted your words as I did not attribute them to you. Several posters on this thread (and others) HAVE expressed hope that others come forward.
        Only one woman would need to come forward with a credible accusation that could be somehow corroborated. Thus far, no one has come forward to even confirm such a gathering even took place never mind that an assault occurred. How many women came out against Bill Clinton? On the flip side, how many people does it take who come forward and say no such event took place (including a life-long female friend) before we can conclude the accusation is without merit?
        Ford has not even testified yet and you and others have 100% concluded he is unfit to serve. I also to do ascribe motives to people without some first hand knowledge. It is interesting that you conclude that she is doing this out of a sense of civic duty while others conclude she is doing it to disrupt the confirmation. Neither side’s opinion has any more validity than the other as it is impossible to know what is in someone’s heart and mind.
        As for the FBI investigation, no I do not believe they should conduct an investigation into a 30+ year old uncorroborated potential state crime. It is a complete waste of time and money and is not the role of the FBI. It is the job of elected representatives to vet and vote on nominees.
        I too was sexually assaulted as a teen. Should the FBI investigate that or should the only old sexual assaults to be investigated ones that have potential political ramifications?

      • Dear Wendy September 25, 2018, 2:27 pm

        Yeah, if the person who sexually assaulted you when you were a teen had been nominated to sit on the Supreme Court, absolutely the FBI should investigate. I mean, yeah, duh, of course the FBI should investigate any and all assault allegations that super high-ranking civil servants, regardless of party, and those pursuing high-ranking civil servant positions.

        And, yeah, Bill Clinton was and is a fucking dog! I have no problem calling out democrats for bad behavior. This isn’t about him though. Did you also want to throw in Hillary’s emails while you’re at it?

      • Dear Wendy September 25, 2018, 2:35 pm

        And the thing is, it doesn’t even matter if these allegations could be proven true. People like you would likely still support his nomination. I’m guessing you voted for Trump even after you heard him brag about sexually assaulting women by grabbing them by their pussies. So, yeah, we don’t care what you think. Your “honest view of the other side” is completely meaningless to us. Your view of the other side includes handing the presidency over to a guy who brags about assaulting women (and whom 13 women had alleged assaulted them). You — the other side — does not care believe that sexual assault should preclude someone from holding high-ranking positions in our government. That’s your value system and we can’t change that. All we can do is try to galvanize the people who DO share our values, who believe that sexually assaulting people should preclude them from holding office, to get out and vote.

      • keyblade September 25, 2018, 2:27 pm

        “Only one woman would need to come forward with a credible accusation that could be somehow corroborated. ”

        Nobody is willing to let that occur. They don’t care if it did happen, as you so clearly evidenced,

        (” If I believe that a watered down version of her story did occur, I do not believe that would preclude him from serving on the SC.)” they don’t think it is a big deal to anyone other than Dr. Ford. “)

        “On the flip side, how many people does it take who come forward and say no such event took place (including a life-long female friend) before we can conclude the accusation is without merit?”

        It would be good, if the people named were allowed to come forward and testify.

        But don’t pretend like you’d care if they did, or that the right wouldn’t attack republicans for even entertaining the idea of not just proceeding for the jugular.

        Using your logic, it should be perfectly fine for me to examine why you would use your sexual assault to make a political argument and therefore doubt the merit of bringing your personal experience into the threads at all.

      • LisforLeslie September 25, 2018, 2:39 pm

        I’ve concluded that he’s unfit to serve because he lied to the nominating committee repeatedly about the work he did within the past 15 years.

        As for FBI investigations – if he is going to sit in the top most branch of the entire Judicial office, I would hope that he would be put through as rigorous a background check as a field agent.

    • Kate September 25, 2018, 1:15 pm

      “All victims should be believed and taken seriously” doesn’t jibe with “in a he-said, she-said situation, the truth lies somewhere in the middle.” Why would it? Why wouldn’t it be that he assaulted her and he’s lying?

      The reason I hope more women come forward is because I DO believe Ford and Ramirez are credible. I think he did what they’re saying he did. And I don’t want a guy who did those things, even at 17, 18, years old, to be making decisions that affect women’s rights. I don’t want this creep on the Supreme Court. Period. It’s not to spite Dump, or get back at the Republicans for Garland. It’s because this guy has credible allegations that he’s a sexual assaulter and attempted rapist.

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      • Lorraine September 25, 2018, 2:04 pm

        And if the accusations are proven to be false? Would you still object to him being confirmed?

      • Bittergaymark September 25, 2018, 2:10 pm

        They won’t be proven false. Just wait.

        Meanwhile Kavanaugh has PROVED himself a liar with his bullshit about his drinking. Exhibit A: his freshmen college roommate who stares rather plainly that Kavanaugh was often an obnoxious abd brlligerant drunk. So much so said roommate has NO reason not to believe the latest allegation. More — he personally knew that accuser and states she has a reputation for being honest.

      • Kate September 25, 2018, 2:21 pm

        That’s the thing, Lorraine, no one is going to prove them false. If they can, great, move forward. That’s fine. But the guy has already shown himself to be a liar and perjurer. He doesn’t want the FBI to investigate or Mark Judge to be called as a witness. He’s sketchy as hell. What’s probably going to happen is more of these women will come forward with credible allegations which can be corroborated.

    • anonymousse September 25, 2018, 1:15 pm

      Nobody hopes he assaulted more women. People hope if there are more victims-that they come forward.

      Not getting to sit on a lifetime appointment to the Supreme Court is hardly ruining his life or just punishment.

      As far as everything else you wrote, it honestly turns my stomach. When someone accuses someone of assault or rape, you really think the truth is somewhere in the middle? Sickening.

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      • Dear Wendy September 25, 2018, 1:40 pm

        Right? So far, no one is accusing Kavanaugh of rape (“only” attempted rape), but if someone did, what even is “somewhere in the middle” of a rape allegation?! What, “just the tip”? Give me a break.

    • Dear Wendy September 25, 2018, 1:22 pm

      And, honestly, if you truly believe that a “watered down version” of a sexual assault allegation should not preclude a person from a lifetime position on our highest court where he will make rulings that affect people’s lives and rights all across the country, I’m positive we will not find common ground on this issue. All I can hope for is that people who share your opinion and your value system are outnumbered on Election Day.

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    • keyblade September 25, 2018, 1:48 pm

      ” The Republicans blocked it because it was a Presidential election year and Obama had less than a year left to serve in office.”

      Personally, I think this is much worse, then taking time to really investigate the claims being made.

      I happen to think American Pie high school and college culture should preclude someone from being a Supreme court justice and interpreting the constitution on the highest levels. It isn’t as though President Trump won’t get to pick another supreme court justice to nominate if it turns out Kavanaugh, most likely did traumatize a fellow high school student while he was in a drunken stupor. If he doesn’t, personally, make it to the highest court, nobody has robbed him of the position. Nor has anyone undone thirty years of life. He will go on having a Yale law degree and a family he’s proud to present and being the man he has subsequently been the last 30 years.

      A lot of teenagers do stupid things. I personally feel I’m in no position to judge if what he drunkenly did or didn’t do 30 years ago, is the most accurate reflection of his fitness of character as a human being.

      Lot’s of people do lots of foolish things in fraternities, high school, and as when they are young. But to me, this isn’t a conversation about how much culture has shifted and human kind has stayed the same. What is in question is how what our current standards are. I question if we will ever make progress in how we treat people who come forward to testify about sexual harassment. I’d like to be hopeful that Dr. Ford’s claims could be treated differently than Anita Hills, that congress could actually act in a manner that suggests that the office is more important than their politics of rushing him onto the bench.

      But sexual harassment will never be as important as politics. Democrats almost never have control of both the house and senate. I doubt they will after the election. People are panicking over the seat because a lot of people aren’t convinced our own President is fit for office. They do not trust members of the republican caucus to hold him accountable even if he does violate the rule of laws or constitution.

      I’m not convinced the powers which be won’t ignore, forgive, and excuse Trump of anything and everything he does domestically and abroad. He treats members of his own cabinet with contempt but they don’t care as long as they still have a job.

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    • Skyblossom September 25, 2018, 2:24 pm

      From the New Yorker. https://www.newyorker.com/news/news-desk/senate-democrats-investigate-a-new-allegation-of-sexual-misconduct-from-the-supreme-court-nominee-brett-kavanaughs-college-years-deborah-ramirez

      “During his confirmation hearing before the Senate Judiciary Committee, Kavanaugh swore under oath that as a legal adult he had never “committed any verbal or physical harassment or assault of a sexual nature.”

      People are coming forward to say that he did do that type of behavior while he was in college. If he did and he lied about it then he perjured himself very recently. He did that as an adult who is wanting to be on the Supreme Court knowing that if he had verbally or physically harassed or assaulted a women he would no longer be considered qualified to sit on the Supreme Court. The sexual behavior itself disqualifies him and the very recent perjury certainly disqualifies him. To commit perjury as an adult man who is both a lawyer and a judge is unacceptable. Unacceptable in the same way it was unacceptable when Bill Clinton perjured himself when testifying about sex.

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      • Kate September 25, 2018, 2:29 pm

        He also said in his interview on Fox last night that he was a virgin until many years after high school/college. Come on, really? That can be disputed easily.

    • LisforLeslie September 25, 2018, 2:29 pm

      He’s been proven a liar in terms of his ACTUAL WORK PRODUCT and what he knew/did not contribute to during his time working for Bush. He lied about his involvement to nominate a guy to an appeals court and the 5th circuit court. He lied about his involvement and then they found emails indicating he was very involved. They withheld 100,000 documents from the nominating committee – why? Don’t tell me these Senators don’t have security clearance to see this information – it’s to hold evidence back.

      The “last minute” stuff – was not last minute. Almost as soon as Kavanaugh was nominated did the first victim come forward. Feinstein has a letter from JULY. The Republicans tried to sweep it under the rug. Feinstein sent a letter to Grassley in JULY. Not September. JULY.

      So the Republicans are trying to ram this through so they get a win before the mid-terms because they see the writing on the wall.

      Even without the assault accusation – they should have pulled his nomination. Now it’s just getting embarrassing .

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  • Bittergaymark September 25, 2018, 1:56 pm

    There is a tremendous difference between wishing for more victims versus wishing more victims’ tales could be heard…

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    • LisforLeslie September 25, 2018, 2:33 pm

      It’s not wishing more people were hurt, but that those who have been hurt are able to come forward.

      Go read Andrea Constand’s personal impact statement at Cosby’s hearing -she prompted the exposure of a Dangerous Sexual Predator (judge’s categorization) because she refused to be silent.

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      • Bittergaymark September 25, 2018, 2:36 pm

        Exactly. I agree.

  • Bittergaymark September 25, 2018, 3:03 pm

    PS — for somebody who pretty much owes her entire present career to her very own sexual harassment — Megan Kelly is — sure as fuck — feckless and an outright Republican shill when it comes to Kavanaugh. Talk about a vapid and empty vessel…

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    • keyblade September 25, 2018, 5:03 pm

      I can’t claim to know what is happening on The Today Show, but I’m doubtful her entire career and where she is now is simply a by-product of the presidential debates or sexual harassment, though I’m sure the exposure from the debates didn’t derail her from her professional opportunites.

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      • Bittergaymark September 25, 2018, 5:11 pm

        She is laughably mediocre as a journalist. And only passable as an anchor.

  • Bittergaymark September 26, 2018, 10:41 am

    Damn. Who knew you could drunkenly gangrape underage girls at parties and still claim to be a virgin?
    Oh, wait! Wait, wait, wait! I forgot — silly me! None of this is on his high school calendar — so obviously it simply never ever happened. For fuck’s sake — the “Hey! Look at my highschool calendar!”defense is the silliest thing I have ever seen put forth. And this is from a judge — mind you? Exactly how dumb do Republicants truly believe the American Voter to be? EVERY man, woman, and child should be up in arms over such dimwitted utter nonsense…

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    • Skyblossom September 26, 2018, 11:23 am

      We had a woman in yesterday at work saying that she was getting really excited about politics. Then she said she wished everyone would be civil so I was beginning to think that she was leaning toward the side of the accuser. Then she said Kavanaugh was a nice man and if what happened didn’t bother his wife it was no concern of the rest of us. As if this was a matter of him cheating on his wife and if it didn’t bother her it shouldn’t bother us. I couldn’t reply. I can’t get into an arguement with a patron. I had to walk away while someone else talked to her. I’m thinking what about the victim. This wasn’t between Kavanaugh and his wife. This is about the lifelong negative affect on the victim and it is about his amoral actions where he treated women as objects to be used for his own gratification. He assumed he could do whatever he wanted without consequence because he came from a family with enough money to send him to a privileged prep school.

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      • Skyblossom September 26, 2018, 11:24 am

        I was thinking she was leaning toward the accuser because people are threatening to kill her and that is about as uncivil as you can get.

  • LisforLeslie September 26, 2018, 11:24 am

    Just because he didn’t get laid, doesn’t mean he wasn’t aggressively trying to.

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  • Miss MJ September 26, 2018, 11:47 am

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  • ele4phant September 26, 2018, 12:21 pm

    Kavanagh will definitely be confirmed.

    The GOP was already in danger of losing of the house and losing ground in the Senate – fury over confirming Kavanagh may make the losses they sustain worse, but they were already looking at losing ground.

    The likelihood they will be able to confirm a conservative court justice after the mid-terms is about to evaporate, so the trade-off of taking on some additional short electoral damage vs long-term goal of making the court more conservative is totally worth it for the GOP.

    Then they can spend the next two years blaming the Democrats for gridlock or any new issue that emerges, like the economy softening, and make an effort in 2020 to re-elect Trump and regain the seats they lost in 2018.

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    • keyblade September 27, 2018, 7:38 am

      I agree he will be confirmed. This whole thing for them is just some silly formality they have to sit through politely.

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      • Kate September 27, 2018, 8:54 am

        I just – please, Lisa Murkowski and Susan Collins. Please.

  • Dear Wendy September 26, 2018, 6:46 pm

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  • keyblade September 27, 2018, 7:36 am

    I feel so nervous for Ford. If I could talk to her, I’d wish her good luck and solidarity. She’s brave to put herself through this and she’ll be remembered for her effort to acknowledge what happened to her under Oath.

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  • Kate September 27, 2018, 10:03 am

    God, can you guys fucking IMAGINE going through what CBF is undergoing right now?

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  • Bittergaymark January 3, 2019, 4:13 pm

    It is so maddening —how none of this matters whatsoever. None of it. They always ALWAYS win.

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