Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

My friend Emily posted on her Insta stories today that she won a contest on Instagram, writing the happiest story she could using only four words (her story: “Mitch McConnell hemorrhoids forever.” ). It sounded so fun, I’m stealing the idea and inviting you all to write the happiest stories YOU can using only four words. I will choose one winner (by Friday morning), and in honor of midterms in less than three weeks, I’ll send the winner the brand new book, Shade: A Tale of Two Presidents, by Obama’s Chief Official White House Photographer, Pete Souza.

Here are a few to start:

1. Thank you, Madame President.
2. We heard the heartbeat.
3. She found love, finally.
4. 10-hour work week.
5. Blue house AND senate.

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CIRCLE ICON DW 0127145

This week in the forums we’re discussing:

Is my boyfriend being too judgmental?

Cultural appropriation

Need advice for encouraging my husband to find a job

Catfished

“My Wife of 21 Years No Longer Wants to Have Sex With Me”

I need advice on my mil desperately!

Anxiety over making out with someone else before things got serious

Husband going out with other women really bugging me. Am I being irrational?

Help? Friend’s GF driving me nuts

An indecisive man

Follow along on Facebook and Instagram.

If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at [email protected].

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I went out with two of my co-workers last weekend and got way, way, way too intoxicated and said some extremely inappropriate things about our other co-worker. My memory of it is pretty hazy, but I’m pretty sure I said some things along the lines of how hot I think he is and how I’d sleep with him even though he has a girlfriend, though I’m sure I expressed this is more vulgar terms. While I was saying all of this, the two co-workers I was out with were telling me to stop, saying it wasn’t cool, etc. I don’t know what got into me or what came over me; I would never, ever dream of making a move on someone who is in a relationship, and while I do have a crush on the guy, I never planned to do anything about it.

I’m so mortified and am pretty sure the co-workers I was drinking with have told him everything I said because they have a friendship with him outside of work. I’m so ashamed and embarrassed that I’ve been losing sleep over it, thinking about my behavior all day every day, and I am terrified of going back to work and having to face everyone. I know that there’s no way the co-worker I have a crush on will be able to view me in a positive light after learning the things I said about him. I don’t know if I should speak to him privately or speak to the two guys I went out with and try to clear up the situation. I know that even though I was drunk, I’m to blame for my actions. I acted like a complete idiot and crossed a line that I should not have, I’m beating myself up about this so much, and I’m so embarrassed and scared of what it’s going to be like when I go back to work. FYI, I’m a full-time student who works at a bar, so I only have to be there three nights a week, but I’ve worked there for a while and have good relationships with my co-workers. I’m afraid now everyone will see me as a vulgar sloppy drunk and a home-wrecker! — Not Always a Vulgar Sloppy Drunk

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I’m a 21-year-old single mom of a little boy who is the center of my world. Just 20 months ago my fiancé (and son’s father) committed suicide in our first family home. It was very sudden and no one saw it coming. Our relationship hadn’t been the best, but we stuck by each other regardless. Since his death, his family and friends have blamed me for his dying. They have harassed me, abused me over social media, and just made my life hell, and because of that my son and I haven’t seen them in over a year. (They haven’t asked to see my son or tried to.)

About a month ago I started seeing a guy I used to work with when I was younger. We’ve always been friends, and seeing each other in a romantic way came completely out of the blue. But my ex-fiancé’s family have already been interfering and have been trying to scare him off. It started with them sending him messages saying he shouldn’t be with me. When he didn’t reply and blocked them from social media, they got other people to message him instead on their behalf. In total, about six different people have messaged my new partner. They’ve even gone as far as to invite him to their house to discuss why he’s in a relationship with me and to justify why he wants to be with me. Only two days ago my ex in-laws tracked down my new partner’s parents and have started messaging them telling them that their son shouldn’t be getting involved with me, spreading cruel lies, etc. It’s taking its toll on me and my new partner, and I don’t know what to do. I’m so scared that if it doesn’t work out with this guy, it won’t ever work with anyone else.

I feel completely hopeless and so down about the whole situation. Will they always be there to ruin things for me? Will they ever leave me alone? It’s hard enough dating as a single mom, but to date while I’ve got ex in-laws who hate me just makes everything so much harder. I don’t know what to do. Any advice will be appreciated. — Harassed By Ex In-Laws

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