I met Aaron at university, and we hung out every day for the next week. He introduced me to his friends and he took me everywhere he went. I immediately felt connected to him, and it was amazing being together. After a week we kissed and I was in heaven (he looks like my dream guy). For our first night having sex, he had prepared a romantic setting and it was amazing. He was such a gentleman. I didn’t know what to do afterwards, so I asked if he wanted me to sleep there. He said, “Whatever you feel like,” so I stayed to show him he was not just a one-night stand for me.

Beginning the next day, he transformed into someone else. He started ghosting me until he finally agreed to meet me before he left for a long vacation. I asked him directly about us, to which he answered: “I promise when I’m back everything will become clear,” and he kissed me goodbye. I counted the days for his return, but he didn’t even let me know he was back. I saw him a few days later at a bar where I was with friends. I was angry at him for disappearing, so I wasn’t so friendly. After a few days of silence I finally confronted him. He said he is not the relationship type but if I wanted, we could “meet” once in a while. I didn’t agree, so we hugged and said goodbye.

I cannot understand how someone who seemed so perfect changed completely and shut me off after having sex with me one time. I am angry at him for making me feel like we had something special. And I’m angry at me for still obsessing over him and looking at his and his now-girlfriend’s pictures on social media. But most of all, I feel guilty because my boyfriend really doesn’t deserve this.

I keep thinking of my mistakes and what I could have done differently so that he would have stayed with me. I don’t know if I lost true love or if this is just a hit on my self-esteem and ego that I need to get over. Truth is, I had never had a one-night stand or even been dumped before, so this was the first and only time I had to deal with something like this.

After weeks of feeling conflicted and increasing pressure from my family of origin about attending, I made the difficult decision not to go to the party because I do not feel safe. I expected disappointment from my family, but I was instead met with anger; they are not speaking to me now. Apparently, I am the only guest who feels unsafe and thinks that having the party is a bad idea right now (for a multitude of reasons).