Reply To: Am I being too pushy on dates? I could use some advice.

To Copa: And I agree with you. I accepted that it COULD come across that way. I am literally not disagreeing. That is why I’ve concluded that asking once is best from here on out; it avoids confusion.

My disagreement is mostly against that I’m intentionally pressuring her or that I “should know better”. Dating, hookups, sex, consent, is tbh confusing. And if you think it’s black and white and I’m some kind of predator, then that’s fine too. But I legit came here looking for advice and understand and I’m confused… and I think I did a good job accepting advice before Anonymousse came in with an attack (read my prior post and hers/his)

I do actually think she ended things seperately from the hookup. She mentioned that chemistry was more the issue. I think the hookup was consensual, she was enthusiatic, and that she still would prefer that she didn’t go home with me. She was probably like 60% enthusiastic about the idea and that makes sense. I’ve been there before too.

That make sense about online dating and I think that sheds light on why moving slower, even though I feel like it’s in some ways silly and regressive, is best. It avoid confusion and presents me better.