I think sometimes, for reasons we’re unsure, two people have a chemistry that makes them act very irrationally, and that seems to be going on here. This is Schrodinger’s boyfriend. You simultaneously want and don’t want him.
It seems to be you want him to want you, but don’t actually want him. That’s what your actions are saying at least. This is probably worth exploring in therapy.
Leave the poor guy alone, if not for your sake, than his.