Reply To: What do I suffer from?

You need a new therapist, one who actually helps you and probably a new dose or new kind/type of antidepressant. A little tweak can change things dramatically.

Random advice forums online are not going to help you the way actual professionals who are medically trained to handle the (yes, it sounds exactly like depression) mental health issues you are having.

Instead of spending your off weeks trying to change yourself and reinvent the wheel, why don’t you try to get organized, get a planner and get better and more intentional and routined about being a mom so that it doesn’t throw you for such a loop?

Your therapist helps you in what way? You sound stuck and like this is as far as therapy can take you but it doesn’t really seem like you’re doing any work in therapy right now?